Parents Gym implosion

[twinmomma]

I'm so angry. My DD's gym basically just imploded. I'm angry that someone who runs a business for and about kids basically screwed over every last one of the team kids in the program. Everyone is finding new homes, but we're 8 weeks from the start of season, and a MONTH from DD's new gym's intersquad and her old gym hadn't even taught them the sequence for the beam routine yet (the skills yes, just not put it together). Of course we go on vacation so she'll miss 5 practices this month.

DD fell apart last night (her second night at the new gym). She loves it there, the coach and the girls seem to love her (they squealed when they saw her and hugged her "you came back!!!" - I almost cried). But when we got home she cried, said she wanted to go back to her old gym, which I reminded her really wasn't there to go back to - no team coach and at least half the girls are in other places already. She said she knew, it just "wasn't fair." And it's not.

This all happened so fast that coaches didn't (couldn't) say goodbye and kids have just scattered. I'm so tired of adults in youth sports being in it for the wrong reasons. I really hope this new gym is the right place for DD.

 

[Flyaway]

I'm so sorry. She's right. It's not fair and it totally sucks. Sadly, I think it happens more than people think. My dd's gym went through something similar about 2 years before we came and it's just now gaining momentum again. It's a tough, tough thing. I'm sorry for all the girls and coaches involved who were simply collateral damage. I hope your dd adjusts quickly. ((Hugs))

 

[Mrs. Puma]

That's terrifying...I'm sorry! Good luck to you!

 

[sce]

That's awful. I'm glad your dd had a place tog o where she was warmly welcome. The sadness is also totally normal. Even a good new situation is still new and she is adjusting.

 

[beachgirl]

We had this happen last month. If the gym imploded it means it wasn't the right gym to be at in the first place. There were problems that led to the implosion. When our gym imploded my daughter and one other girl went to a new gym, while the majority of the team followed the head coach to another a gym. Sure, things are different at the new gym and my daughter misses her teammates and her coaches, but we sure don't miss the drama and it's been wonderful to see how a gym is supposed to run professionally. We have been at the new gym for one month yesterday and at first my daughter had tears every now and then (okay, I did too), but they are becoming fewer and farther between. I'm still very angry about the old gym, but I'm trying to let it go for my daughter's sake. Since there is nothing you can do about it or change things now, the best thing to do is embrace the new gym and try to forget what happened.

 

[twinmomma]

We had this happen last month. If the gym imploded it means it wasn't the right gym to be at in the first place. There were problems that led to the implosion. When our gym imploded my daughter and one other girl went to a new gym, while the majority of the team followed the head coach to another a gym. Sure, things are different at the new gym and my daughter misses her teammates and her coaches, but we sure don't miss the drama and it's been wonderful to see how a gym is supposed to run professionally. We have been at the new gym for one month yesterday and at first my daughter had tears every now and then (okay, I did too), but they are becoming fewer and farther between. I'm still very angry about the old gym, but I'm trying to let it go for my daughter's sake. Since there is nothing you can do about it or change things now, the best thing to do is embrace the new gym and try to forget what happened.

THIS. We've already experienced this in less than a week at the new place.

I do think the fact that one of her old teammates showed up at the new place, while she was happy to see her, almost made it worse because she was a reminder. But I also know DD was exhausted and it's been a long week for her.

 

[beachgirl]

Is the old teammate going to stay at the new gym with your daughter?

 

[twinmomma]

Possibly. We have another old teammate trying it out next week and hopefully at least one more too. Maybe one will stick.

 

[beachgirl]

Having one other girl sure makes it easier.

 

[Seeker]

She will adjust. It's hard to be forced into a change, but if this new gym is established and successful already, it will be such a welcome change. We moved gyms a bit over a year ago and it was like night and day. It's been a very good change.

 

[twinmomma]

The new gym is extremely established. 30 year history with college gymnasts to it's credit. I even ran it by dunno! lol

It was just so hard to have her cry yesterday. Our household has had to deal with drama this summer with both kids' sports and I'm over it.

 

[my4buffaloes]

Let her cry because it really isn't fair that it happened. But in time you will likely look back and see this was a good thing.

 

[Gymbee06]

Sorry to sound dumb I apologise in advance but what does gym implosion mean? I'm in the uk and I've never heard this term before.

 

[COz]

Sorry to sound dumb I apologise in advance but what does gym implosion mean? I'm in the uk and I've never heard this term before.

She just means that the program fell apart, due to mismanagement or something rather than an external party shutting it down.

 

[twinmomma]

She just means that the program fell apart, due to mismanagement or something rather than an external party shutting it down.

Yes, just that it was a victim of it's own issues. Or more accurately, that our KIDS were victims of the gym's issues.

 

[OHGymMom]

BTDT with the gym falling apart. Two years ago HC and Gym owner had a huge blow up after practice. That evening HC and every assistant coach walked out the door except one 16 year old assistant. It was an ugly situation and within 24 hours at least 2/3 of team girls had found a new gym including DD (there are 4 old team girls left from over 50 at her old gym). Dd was 13 at the time and had competed 5 years with essentially the same group of girls. She cried, I cried and it was really hard to go through so I feel for you and your DD. However 2 years later and DD loves her gym, teammates, and coaches as much if not more than she did her old gym and teammates. She's also progressed much faster skill wise than she ever would have at the old gym so it turned out good.

Give your DD and yourself time to adjust to the change (actually DD adjusted faster than me to the change). Hugs to you and your daughter and I hope it gets better for you like it did for us.

 

[GymCMLA]

We left 6 weeks ago. Dd has done well, but when we had camp there two weeks ago and old teammates came, we did have tears then as she was sad her old teammates had to go back to old gym she wished they could stay.

 

[Deleted member 18037]

Feelings are just that feelings. And they are mostly temporary (though some times last longer then others).

Life is sad, happy, angry, etc.....

Time, she needs time. And its OK to be sad or angry. Its very normal.

 

[Ausi_poppet]

The new gym is extremely established. 30 year history with college gymnasts to it's credit. I even ran it by dunno! lol

It was just so hard to have her cry yesterday. Our household has had to deal with drama this summer with both kids' sports and I'm over it.

It sounds like it's been pretty traumatic for all of you.

If I were you, I'd just make a nice cup of tea and find a quite place in your house away from everyone else and think through the pros and cons that led you to the new gym. Emotions can often overwhelm our rational thinking - or I know it does for me!

When you are ready, head back out into your family room and the world with your head held high, knowing that you've done the best you can in the situation and having faith in all of you that you are resilient and are going to be much happier in another couple of months. I bet your daughter will settle in really quickly if you can and she'll be rocking out those new routines just in time to wow the judges and show your old club what they are missing out on.

All the best!