WAG Is my kid over gymnastics?

[Orangesoda]

So many great thoughts! Thank you so much.

In answer to a couple questions, yes, she does 1.5hrs twice a week.

And yes, she does other activities: a ballet/tap class once a week. And she's excited to try soccer, which starts this Saturday.

And the reason I question her sincerity when she frowns in response to someone asking if she likes gymnastics is...well...what I observe is sometimes not congruent with what she says. Honestly I think SHE might have mixed feelings toward the sport. She loves to show off her perfect cartwheels when no one ASKS her to - she's proud and likes the positive attention. But if you were to ask her to show you one? No way. She's not an exhibitionist. She's kind of shy. It's almost like she doesn't want to give her old mom (or whomever) the satisfaction of thinking she's enjoying herself. She won't perform. She will for her coach, but not outside the gym.

My biggest concern is her behavior lately in class. It's not horrible or anything. She's a good girl and she does well, or she wouldn't be allowed to continue with the group. I've just noticed her dangling around on the bar and spacing off when she's supposed to be doing something else. It's subtle. And I don't say anything to her about it, but it's there.

I like the idea of asking her if she wants to continue when it's time to re-up. In a matter of fact tone.

 

[Orangesoda]

I guess I need to be prepared to act on her answer.

 

[Deleted member 18037]

For the record, five year olds attention spans, ummm not so much. Nor are they typically self driven. What a difference a couple of years will make.

And my daughter has no problem at meets with a couple of hundred people there and loves to tumble, but ask her too, no way. Children are odd that way they don't like to perform on command, but then neither did/do I.

ps wait until you see a bunch of 5 yr olds on a soccer field, lol

 

[littlegirlsdream]

I have one DD that has loved gymnastics from the age of 5, she loves very structured and rule oriented environments and always has. She isn't the best gymnast ever but she is a 10 year old level 8 and despite numerous challenges in the sport, still seems very passionate about it. My younger DD was/is arguably more athletic by nature (at the age of 5) but disliked greatly the structured envirment and level of discipline that seems to come with this sport. She is 6 and trying other sports now. There was a huge difference in the two of them in regards to how they felt about gymnastics at the age of 5. Not sure if that is at all helpful but it has been my experience so far.

 

[iwannacoach]

Sounds well within the normal. She sees gymnasts as her thing and she'll do it when and where she wants... rather than on command for other people requesting a show. She may change and really eat up the requests to show off or want to train for competitive gymnastics. Maybe a year or so down the road....

 

[sce]

Coaches, what are the signs that a kid is just not cut out for this sport? I'm having trouble sifting typical 5yr old laziness from actual signs that this ain't her thing.

I know you don't know my child. I get that. I'm hoping a discussion might open my mind up to the way I need to be thinking about the topic. TIA.

I don't know of 5yo that are typically lazy. At that age they either enjoy an activity or they don't. They don't get that there is a long-term to anything yet, they do stuff because it's fun. If they aren't having fun then they don't put their all into it. Can you tell if a 5yo is or isn't cut out for gymnastics, sometimes. But, many kids don't even start until 6 or 7yo. Do they enjoy it? Totally different question. Will they want to try again in a year or two , maybe? If you child seems to not want to do gymnastics, do not force it. Let her know that she can stop, either for a little while or forever.

 

[sce]

I understand that mentality. What if the child likes every activity for the first couple months and then wants to try something different when the "newness" wears off and the hard work persists? Hopefully you're not reading this as argumentative. I'm just voicing the struggle in my mind

Typical for a 5yo. Let her try stuff, she should eventually decide what she enjoys.

 

[Deleted member D3987]

she's 5? come back and ask when she's 8.

 

[Orangesoda]

she's 5? come back and ask when she's 8.

Huh?

 

[Deleted member D3987]

she's 5. what you described is normal for that age range. if she's still that way at 8 then she's probably not interested in gymnastics.

 

[auswi]

All kids are different - simple rule in our house- finish the season/ term/ then it's their choice
It works well because often part way through the season the child will have a 'flat' patch but by the end of the season is keen to carry on.... And sometimes they try something new.
Not the gymmy though - dispite offering her other options she's very passionate.
However as a small child she tried every sport going which was fantastic as now if / when she chooses to retire from gym she has a grounding in other sports.

 

[CameraShy]

My son is like what you're describing, down to the hours at the gym as well. He's also 5 and I need to decide if we want to pursue gym or take a break because he will be able to compete this next season (turns 6 in April). DD (L6) was never like this at his age so I'm assuming he's just not that into it. I'm leaning more toward taking a break and just focusing on other things and waiting to see if he asks about it. If not, then it really wasn't his thing after all! Good luck figuring it out!

 

[Orangesoda]

she's 5. what you described is normal for that age range. if she's still that way at 8 then she's probably not interested in gymnastics.

Thanks for clarifying. Got it.

 

[sce]

she's 5? come back and ask when she's 8.

Right?!?

 

[COz]

I've just noticed her dangling around on the bar and spacing off when she's supposed to be doing something else. It's subtle. And I don't say anything to her about it, but it's there.

She could just be tired or hungry.
I'd try feeing her a bit more beforehand and seeing if that changes this behaviour.

 

[GlobalNomad]

What is she doing just before practice? Sometimes it's not that they dislike the sport, it's that they dislike stopping the fun thing they were doing to get ready to leave, or feel like they are missing out on something fun because they were at practice.

 

[lovemygymnast]

That's tough because it depends on the child, the time of day and mood. Mine at 4 was super serious about gym, she's 7 now and still is. While she had friends her age at 4 & 5 that would cry not wanting to come to gym. Or would come to gym & just sob. One still cries about coming depending on the day. But that girl is a good little gymnast and once she's out there, seems happy & enjoys it. I think they're all just different about how they feel from day to day. So, as she ages up, I'd just ask each time if she wants to continue and if she doesn't, give her a break and she will likely want to come back to it later.

 

[rjb123]

I understand that mentality. What if the child likes every activity for the first couple months and then wants to try something different when the "newness" wears off and the hard work persists? Hopefully you're not reading this as argumentative. I'm just voicing the struggle in my mind

No, not at all. I just think that at 5, you shouldn't force a kid to do team gym. If she is consistently saying she doesn't want to go, this likely isn't her thing.
My (now 5) year old wanted to do ballet. Talked about ballet. Dreamed about ballet. So I signed her up for ballet. She hated it. Didn't want to go. I made her stick it out for a few months, but it just wasn't her thing. So I talked to her and we dropped it. Now she is doing gym (like her big sis only 5 hours vs the million that my older one does!) and really enjoying it. Is she amazing , eh not really. BUT she loves it, and 99% of the time is over the top excited to go.
My 9 year old loves gym. Loves it. She doesn't win all the time, things don't come easily to her all the time, she works HARD but she LOVES it. LOVES the hard work. Loves the workout and the challenge. IMO if a kid doesn't have passion for something, why force them to do it? This is an extra curricular activity, ykwim? Help them find what they really love to do and do that.

 

[rsm]

So many great thoughts! Thank you so much.

In answer to a couple questions, yes, she does 1.5hrs twice a week.

And yes, she does other activities: a ballet/tap class once a week. And she's excited to try soccer, which starts this Saturday.

And the reason I question her sincerity when she frowns in response to someone asking if she likes gymnastics is...well...what I observe is sometimes not congruent with what she says. Honestly I think SHE might have mixed feelings toward the sport. She loves to show off her perfect cartwheels when no one ASKS her to - she's proud and likes the positive attention. But if you were to ask her to show you one? No way. She's not an exhibitionist. She's kind of shy. It's almost like she doesn't want to give her old mom (or whomever) the satisfaction of thinking she's enjoying herself. She won't perform. She will for her coach, but not outside the gym.

My biggest concern is her behavior lately in class. It's not horrible or anything. She's a good girl and she does well, or she wouldn't be allowed to continue with the group. I've just noticed her dangling around on the bar and spacing off when she's supposed to be doing something else. It's subtle. And I don't say anything to her about it, but it's there.

I like the idea of asking her if she wants to continue when it's time to re-up. In a matter of fact tone.

For what it's worth, my DD was almost exactly the same at 5. I did ask every time we signed her up again and gave her choices for other things she could do. She got to pick 2, and always chose gymnastics as one of them (which I was secretly hoping for). But obviously, if she didn't choose it, I would have had to live with it. Once she signed up though, she knew she had to do the 8 weeks, and could choose again at the end of the session. She is not "passionate" about gymnastics as others on her team are. But she likes it enough and has bonded with her teammates. Now she is 9 yo finishing level 5 and still doesn't like to "perform" unless it's her choice. She is still shy about it. Some kids just are. When she's ready, she will bust out some moves, but being asked to do something is a recipe for assuring that she doesn't

 

[Judybird]

I would be surprised if any 5 year old gymmie didn't have times when they whined a bit about going to practice or got distracted at practice. It's the nature of the age. Now frequent tears and "stomach aches" designed to prevent attendance at practice would be another thing.

Although my DD is typically enthusiastic about gym, she does have an "I want to quit" phase that happens once a year around Mid-season. I always tell her she can quit if she wants after states and begin another activity. When it comes time to re-register, she always wants to continue. One year she may not. Who knows.

I'd say give your DD the option to quit at the end of the season but make sure she understands that she'll have to do something else (swimming, knitting, piano, softball, whatever). That might help her understand what she is deciding. When my DD was 5 or 6 and said "I don't want to do gym" it was because she wanted to play with a friend or watch a TV show. When I explained she would have to take up another activity that would fill her time, she opted for gym.