Off Topic "Like a Girl"

[Quadqueen]

Just saw this on another site and had to share:



It's so powerful and thought provoking!

 

[gymgymgymnast08]

Great video! I think gymnastics is really good at helping girls see how strong they are!

I had a poster that said:

"You run like a girl
you jump like a girl
you swing like a girl
you tumble six feet over a four inch beam like a girl."

It's over 10 years since I was in 3rd grade but I still remember when our class had to carry tables and our male teacher said that the girls couldn't help because the tables would be too heavy for us and then some of the boys in our class started making fun of us for not being strong enough to carry the tables. Me and two of my friends (who were also gymnasts) proceeded to carry a bunch of the tables and then later in the year we had to do the presidential physical fitness tests and the only people who passed the presidential were us three. Then the boys started complaining that it was easier for girls to pass because all the requirements were easier and then the gym teacher told them that we had passed for boys as well. After that they never bothered us again.

 

[Iwannabemargo]

my daughter loves arm wrestling her brothers friends (who are 2 years older than her)

 

[Flossyduck]

This has always worried me.

I remember taking my dd to buy a new coat, when she was maybe 6 or 7 (and still liked girls things!). She tried one on and stood in front of the mirror and the female assistant asked what she thought. My dd replied "I look like a princess" and the assistant looked quite surprised. Then she gave a huge smile and agreed that she did look like a princess, but as she was packaging up, and out of dd's earshot, she said "do you know how rare it is for girls to be so positive about themselves like that? I can't tell you how many girls I see, who just get embarrassed, don't like to look at themselves or don't see a princess".

I remember wondering at the time what age that self consciousness and negativity started to set in and was determined to do what I could to strengthen dd's self belief in the hope she could ride the storm.

I genuinely think gymnastics, and maybe sport generally, was the best thing she could have become involved with. She is 100% proud of her body and her muscles and I catch her checking herself out all the time! At sports day she was in a mixed running race and some of the boys were also a year older, but she believed she could win and she ran as if she could (she was a close second to a very sporty boy). Even now there were a couple of girls who set off down the track with barely any effort at all and just looked totally embarrassed by the whole thing. I completely understand not everyone likes sport and sports day is excruciating for kids who don't like sport (although truly I thought that happened later than 9 & 10)- but I just loved the belief my daughter had that she could win if she tried. And afterwards she was so happy "did you see how fast I ran, I felt as though my feet hardly touched the floor". And then she spent some time experimenting to see if it's possible to actually run so fast her feet don't touch the floor

I hope she sticks with the gymnastics long enough to get her through. I hope that if she quits next week she has learned enough about how amazingly strong and capable she is.

But I think there is a whole separate pressure which starts to kick in and which says that competitiveness is to be frowned on. We've discussed before how people don't bat an eyelid when kids practice piano every night and artistic skills are celebrated, but if you have a talented sports child people are much quicker to think it's pushy and/or that sporting achievements are not somehow as important or useful and musical or academic ones. Everyone has to be a winner, when it comes to sport.

It's a bit of a minefield, but I think she'll come out ok!

 

[LucyTRA]

I hate the 'like a girl' insult! I grew up in quite a non-gender stereotyped way, we weren't allowed Barbie dolls and were encouraged to play with things that interested us (which for me, a lot of the time, was science-y type toys, often regarded as being for boys...), so when someone first said to me that I did something 'like a girl' I looked incredulously at them and said 'I AM a girl!' I genuinely thought that they hadn't realised!

That said it did make me think that in training some of the things that get batted around most often are 'man up' and 'grow a pair'. I think amongst my group of friends and coaches (and we are talking about adult only sessions here) we are generally being ironic rather than serious, but it did make me think that we probably should be doing that.

Great video, thanks for sharing

 

[cbifoja]

I also find irony in the phrase "grow some balls" or "grow a pair" to indicate that you need to get tough. Please. Hit a man in his pair and he folds like a house of cards! What's so tough about that?!?!? LOL

One thing they teach in "teacher school" is not to have gender specific tasks. You ask both the girls and the guys to carry stuff. You ask them both to clean up areas.

 

[cbifoja]

I remember wondering at the time what age that self consciousness and negativity started to set in and was determined to do what I could to strengthen dd's self belief in the hope she could ride the storm.

Most girls take a HUGE hit in early middle school. But they will start showing signs earlier than that.

 

[ollieblueeyes]

My DH and I have really tried to raise our girls to be strong and confident. DH's motto since day one is 'you can't coddle them'! As babies and toddlers it was a little hard to take, but as they are entering their teen/tween ages I see that they are growing into strong, confident ladies that know they can accomplish anything and aren't held back by gender. It does not hurt that they have great role models in out combined family. A female FBI agent, attorney, business owners etc.

A few weeks back YDD is no longer a gymnast but was at swim practice and the coach assigned pushups to the mixed team. He gave different numbers to the boys vs. girls. I asked her what she did. She said did the boys number is better form that all the boys. I have to say I was not really happy with the coach and debate weather this is something I should bring up at the next meeting.

Would you bring it up?

 

[profmom]

For swim practice?? Yes, I'd say something! For goodness' sake, they're doing the same strokes! I'd be seriously annoyed if my daughter were being held to a lower standard because she's female.

 

[profmom]

And let's not forget the enormous benefit that boys get from being in the gym, where, until they are upper-level optionals, they are surrounded by female athletes who are undeniably bigger, stronger, more competent, and tougher than they are. Both of my sons will be better men because they grew up with a sister who's a gymnast.

 

[ollieblueeyes]

For swim practice?? Yes, I'd say something! For goodness' sake, they're doing the same strokes! I'd be seriously annoyed if my daughter were being held to a lower standard because she's female.

And the funny thing is the girls typically get faster, younger.... So my DD is regularly beating the boys who were assigned more pushups....

But to be honest, this is not really typical for the program. They all do the same sets and whatnot at practice. This was a newer coach who is used to coaching the younger groups. Maybe DD made him re-think his approach with girls.....

 

[CreateMagic]

And the funny thing is the girls typically get faster, younger.... So my DD is regularly beating the boys who were assigned more pushups....

But to be honest, this is not really typical for the program. They all do the same sets and whatnot at practice. This was a newer coach who is used to coaching the younger groups. Maybe DD made him re-think his approach with girls.....

I'd say something, but non-confrontationally...and definitively mention what assuming girls are weaker will do to their self-image. The new coach may be young and new, but that's not an excuse, just an opportunity to learn!
I

 

[Flossyduck]

I just wanted to share this. The ad had me thinking, so when my daughter came home from school I asked her she thought 'run like a girl' meant and her genuine response was:

" I'd think it means show the boys what you're made of"

We had a little chat and I feel so heartened by the things she said.

I love my daughter so much!

 

[wnl256]

I saw that video on my facebook feed. And I responded to it with this: Chelsea Baker throws like a girl, and pro batters have a hard time hitting her pitches.

At 17 she throws a mean knuckleball and doesn't care about the fact that she is on an all-boys baseball team. She has already pitched two perfect games, and she makes boys cry when she strikes them out. She is my new girl role model.

 

[kaloss]

I asked my girls (6 year old gymmie and 8 year old book worm/artist) what it means to run/throw/fight like a girl. My gymmie did what the little girls in the video did, then she flexed her biceps and have each one a kiss! Sadly, my 8 year old did what the older ladies did in the video. Then I showed them the video and we talked about how strong and smart they are
I love little teachable moments.

 

[Gymgem05]

My gymmie takes so much pride in running laps with her brothers basketball team! She is faster and has way more endurance. I don't hear so much "you run like a girl"! But some of her non gym girl friends can be the ones that are the most insulting and mean. My opinion is it is just pure jealousy.

 

[raenndrops]

As a kid, I played football on a boys team... youngest player in the league by 17 days (3rd-6th graders)... the only girl... at the team banquet at the end of the season, the coach pulled my dad aside and told him that I had a special award they were giving me AFTER the banquet. This was the same coach that fought to get me on the team because I was 17 days too young, lol. My award had been decided on by the coaches of ALL the teams in the league... NORMALLY, it would be presented at the banquet, but because I was getting it, they decided to hold off.

I was the LEAGUE MVP and all the coaches thought i was the absolute BEST quarterback in the league... they just couldn't tell those 5th and 6th grade boys that a 3rd grade girl was a better QB.

I also played BASEball for 5 years and was on the all star team every year. Additionally, I participated in swimming, basketball, gymnastics, volleyball, track, and adult softball.

My gymmies are also strong girls. OG (age 12) can do it all... she played baseball and got the nickname "Rocket" on her first day because of her hard throwing and accuracy... she is awesome at football, basketball, and soccer, loves to swim and run, and caught on to volleyball in one lesson.

YG likes to run and swim in addition to gymnastics. She is only 9 and has also tried soccer and basketball and did well.

 

[Paint A Melody]

I think they should have given the award to you then. The boys might learn that girls aren't weaklings. Saving the boys pride is no reason to hold back.

 

[kaloss]

Kind of OT, but my older dd told my gymmie that her abs looked like a man's stomach

We had to have a long talk about that.