Missing out?

[SuperGirlmlm]

Do you guys (gymnasts)/your dd miss out on stuff a "normal" teenager gets to do? It can be a good and a bad thing...
I have three friends outside gymnastics, I try to balance them with my sisters (aka teammates) even though I train with them, and since we all have very similar life schedules, we hang out all the time.
I'm 13, and level 8, and I train a lot, and I'm missing out on a lot of stuff, like parties, dances, ect.

Though, it keep's me away from the dreaded drama and gossip. Also, it keeps you out of raging parties and drugs.

Does this sound like you/ your dd?

 

[Mack_the_Ripper]

Gymnastics definitely replaced my social life. I don't know if I would even want to be a "regular teenager" though...the only thing is, there are a lot of clubs and societies and programs like that that I would love to do at school - dance squad, theater, computer science club, math club, literary magazine, Gay-Straight Alliance. I know if for some reason I couldn't do gymnastics, I would fill up all my time with other things.

 

[LiveLoveTumble]

My friends think I'm crazy when I tell them I have to miss this party or that dance or the school carnival or something else because of gym. But it's totally worth it

 

[Deleted member D3987]

did anyone think that we're the ones that are normal, and maybe they're the ones that are "crazy"?

 

[SuperGirlmlm]

All gymnasts are crazy.

 

[Deleted member D3987]

crazy good...not crazy bad.

 

[Wanona]

This is such a good topic. My 6 year daughter is a young gymnast. She was invited to train this summer for possible team placement in the fall. We had a lot of summer travel plans this year, so we took a break from gymnastics and in the Fall she will begin another year preteam. She has one childhood and I want it to be balanced, healthy, and happy. I have a dear friend in her early 40s that I’ve talk with about this very topic. She went to college on a gymnastics scholarship. She is my “go to gal” on most things gymnastics related. She shared with me that she loved gymnastics so much that she never felt like she missed out on anything growing up. However, as an adult and with her gymnastics career behind her and an arthritic back, she sometimes wishes she had gone to that school dance and had been kinder to her body.

 

[Granny Smith]

I don't feel that my dd misses out on being a teenager. She does do tons with her teammates who, like you, have similiar schedules and are teenagers as well. I do admit that she does not do as much with her school friends, but it has been her choice. She has missed school events because of gym meets. Her freshman yr of HS she missed her freshman semi-formal, but like I say to her, it's not like she is sitting home doing nothing. She gets to do things that her school friends don't get to do. She travels the country to compete gymnastics. FTR, she did attend her Sophomore Catillion this yr though. She knows that this upcoming school yr she might miss her Jr. Prom, but knows that gymnastics will not conflict with her Sr. Prom. Sr. class trip might be in jeopordy too, but we will see.

Looking back, I can see where an adult sees things differently, but honestly I'm sure we all look back and wish we did some things differently (regardless of if we were gymnasts or not.)

 

[CoachGoofy]

When I did gym in high school, I didn't miss out on anything worth doing. I went to most of our dances...Junior Prom was the day before States so that was a big no but prom wasn't my thing anyway. I did choir (and got an award senior year.. I did a season of diving (and was not great at it). Made the honor roll. Did crew for drama & was a designated dancer for a musical one year-I "missed out" on acting I guess, except I can't act my way out of a paper bag so probably not. I had non gym friends, & my best friend was gym AND school.

I guess I "missed out" on a couple parties where people got into tremendous trouble, but that's not the kind of thing that's any sort of loss. Being a "good kid" is pretty easy when you've got other things going on.

 

[MaryA]

I just wanted to say that I am enjoying this thread. As a mom whose 11-year-old 6th grader will be in the gym after school every single day for 3.5-4 hours this coming school year I do wonder about what she might miss out on and if she'll have any regrets... especially since I think the chances of her ending up with a gym scholarship are relatively low (6th grade level 7? Could happen but she would have to rise through the ranks pretty quickly). Of course, I realize that this is a skewed sample... the girls who decided that it WASN'T worth it have quit gym and are probably not posting on this board any more. But keep the stories coming, and thanks for sharing them!

 

[SuperGirlmlm]

Level 7 for an 11 year old isn't bad. You could still go for college. Just think, in five years, she could repeat 2 of the levels once and still make level 10 by her sr. year.

 

[bookworm]

My daughter missed out on some of the "normal" teenage things (like a regular school dance, sleepovers) but for major things, I would tell the coach that she was going to : the Prom, the Father Daughter Dance, Sr Class Trip etc...I didn't want her to look back years later and say "I never missed a Friday practice and I never went to the Prom either"...fortunate for things like Nationals we've never had any conflicts so that has always worked out for her.

 

[MaryA]

Level 7 for an 11 year old isn't bad. You could still go for college. Just think, in five years, she could repeat 2 of the levels once and still make level 10 by her sr. year.

Oh, I don't doubt that she'll make it to 10 if she sticks with it. That's actually her goal... to make it to 10. And I'm sure she can do college gym if she wants to too, at some level, but it would take a "perfect storm" of moving quickly through the levels/lack of any major injuries/etc. for a full-ride scholarship to be a real possibility for her.

Anyway, to remain at least semi-on-topic, hopefully she will still feel like all of the time and energy and sacrifices are worth it, even without a tangible "pay off" like a college scholarship. And, if she reaches the point where she doesn't feel like the sacrifices are worth it anymore, I will support her decision to quit (it will break my heart, but I won't tell her that!).

 

[All Chalked Up]

I never feel like I'm missing out. I feel like everyone else is missing out on gymnastics

 

[LizzieLac]

I think that it has been hard for her to really stay connected and spend time with her school friends. However, that is not just becasue of gymnastics. Her other friends are just as busy with swim team and softball!

She would probably say she wants to perform more in the school plays and musicals. She loves to sing and perform. She has been able to do a select chorus at school but that's becuase the practice in the AM before school. Other school activities are hard becuase they conflict with gymnsatics practice.

As a family we try to make sure both of our kids are doing what they love - going to meets and tournaments, staying in hotels, and traveling is pretty cool and not every kid gets to do that and compete in a sport they love. But it is important that they do get to do the sleepovers, parties, and playdates that make them "a kid." I believe at times there are things you must give up to excel at something, but balance is the key.

 

[mommyof1]

I guess I "missed out" on a couple parties where people got into tremendous trouble, but that's not the kind of thing that's any sort of loss. Being a "good kid" is pretty easy when you've got other things going on.

...and this is why I hope my daughter stays interested in gymnastics all the way through high school! (Oops, just revealed my evil plot to keep her locked up in the gym where there are no boys.)

 

[maryRS]

My take on it is that as long as we as parents are not pushing them to do this, that any missing out is their choice. You do see some girls quit (not just gymnastics but other sports) because they want more of a life. There is nothing wrong with that either. Now if a kid is feeling pressured to do gym they may end up resenting the time they missed.

 

[GymGirl's Mom]

My daughter missed out on some of the "normal" teenage things (like a regular school dance, sleepovers) but for major things, I would tell the coach that she was going to : the Prom, the Father Daughter Dance, Sr Class Trip etc...I didn't want her to look back years later and say "I never missed a Friday practice and I never went to the Prom either"...

My DD's gym is fine with this too. That's why I like her gym. Bookworm it's encouraging to hear this from you as your DD achieved very high level gymnastics and didn't miss out on the "big stuff" excellent!

 

[bookworm]

My DD's gym is fine with this too. That's why I like her gym. Bookworm it's encouraging to hear this from you as your DD achieved very high level gymnastics and didn't miss out on the "big stuff" excellent!

Thank you...sometimes I had to be the bad guy by saying she was going but I always felt it was important for her to have a balance in her life. Don't get me wrong, gymnastics has been a HUGE part of all of out lives (especially hers) but there are some things I think kids need to do. And I wanted to be able to look back at decisions I made for her with regards to things she missed, without regrets.

 

[SuperGirlmlm]

Parents can get VERY scary if they start pushing you.
Imaginary Mother- "M!! YOU HAVE TO DO GYMNASTICS! YOU CAN NEVER QUIT!"
Me- "Yes, Mom."
Scary, right?
Oh, and also, boys are at the gym, there's a boys team. Though, all the boys there are super nice