Parents Signs of burnout in young gymnast?

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Amusibus

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I am wondering, my daughter seems stressed out lately and I'm not sure how to tell if it is gymnastics- related or just other things. She's almost 7, soon to leave her developmental group and she doesn't have a spark anymore- for anything- school, gym, dance. With ADHD and all homework does take much longer than the average kid- everything does- leaving her with very little time to herself monday thru thursday. She's more irritable lately, and her attention has gone down the tubes in many different settings. I've gotten complaints from the teacher about her not getting work done, and an email to the coach also revealed she is having the same issues. This may just be a medication issue and we are seeing that doctor on Thursday, but I am just wondering if there are signs that any of it is gymnastic- related? Anyone have a kid who's been thru stuff like this?
 
Have you talked to your daughter about her schedule and activities? My daughter is also 7 years old, and every few weeks we talk about her schedule and I ask her if it's too much, if she still likes gymnastics and her other activities, etc.... I consistently tell her that gymnastics should be fun and she can move back down to rec classes at the end of the year if competing is too much. Her answer has always been that she loves gymnastics and wants to stay on team, but I like to give her the option to talk about it. As her gymnastics hours have increased (this is her first year on team), she has dropped several other activities (dance, swim lessons, after school club).
 
My oldest dd, with ADHD quit when she was 9. She seemed to know it was time. But I did sit down with her and talk it all out, she was worried about school and gymnastics for the following year, knowing the school homework load drastically increases. It was her decision to quit, and I am glad she did that for herself. I think there comes a time, growing up, where kids (and parents) get confused on why they are doing gymnastics. There is a sort of a transition, where kids need to start going to gymnastics because they want to, not because the parents want them to. It is a grey fuzzy line, that needs to be crossed. Your dd may be at that point. Make sure she knows, that she is not going to gymnastics because you want her to, but because she wants to be there. Let her know there is a door out with no consequences, if she needs to take it. Let her know you will not be disappointed in whatever path she chooses. It is just as hard for moms to walkaway from gymnastics as it is for a child. It becomes such a huge part of our lives! ADHD and gymnastics is tough for some, but there is a whole world of sports and activities, out there where she can shine for who she is. My oldest dd went through everything, your dd went through, she made her choice, walked away and never regretted it for a moment. She has a new life and is a much more happy child, with still some organization issues. LOL
 
It may not be gymnastics at all. A medical condition, bullying, not getting enough sleep, food allergy, etc. Since you are seeing a doc about ADD, perhaps a physical or examination as well. Good luck - hope it passes!!
 
If I remember correctly, you are at a very intense-sounding gym that pushes home-schooling at an early age. Perhaps there is another program nearby that would be a better fit for your daughter's needs at this time?
 
If I remember correctly, you are at a very intense-sounding gym that pushes home-schooling at an early age. Perhaps there is another program nearby that would be a better fit for your daughter's needs at this time?

It is the nearby thing that is the kicker. There may be couple in the half hour to 40 minute range that are more laid back, but the local ones are all like this. This gym does have a "league" program, which is team with less hours and more local, thinking of doing this... We'll see, one day at a time. I read the burnout articles, and the "high-anxiety" definitely describes my daughter. Medical issues... God, if this kid gets another diagnosis...! She already has a lot going on medically. Thank you all for your replies. I will try and have a talk with her about it, and will keep you posted.
 
I have two boys with ADHD, and it could quite possibly just be that her medication needs adjusting. A couple of years ago, my normally straight A son suddenly started failing everything. I had no clue what the problem could be. Then the school nurse, who has a son with ADHD, suggested that I ask his dr. about increasing his dosage. We did that and it was like night and day.....immediately. It can be tricky sometimes.
 
My first thought when you mentioned medication, is that maybe she needs to adjust her meds. I know of kids that went from average, high-energy little kids, to almost a zombie like state on the ADHD meds. My nephew's best friend was like that. She said he literally acts like he has no interest in anything, even going trick-or-treat at Halloween, he just meandered along, sort of emotionless. I'd talk to her doctor before assuming it's gymnastics. Maybe they can adjust her medication and see if she gets that "spark" back.
 
My dd is not on medication but does have a diagnosed anxiety disorder. In October we moved her to a YMCA program and it has been wonderful for her! I vote for something less intense if it is available. At one point her anxiety was making gymnastics nearly impossible for her.
 
Is she tired ... does she have to get up with an alarm clock on her current schedule?
 
Update- We saw herDr., and her med did get changed. Waiting to see if that helps as today is first day on new med. She also has an IEP (independant education plan), and we are getting it written in to that that all her written homework will be completed on weekends. During the week I will quiz her orally on math and spelling but nothing written. This should free up 45 minutes each day. Another thing is Dr. agreed she is seeming stressed by the schedule in general, so we are probably going to have her join a more laid-back group at the same gym - not level 4, but level 3 "league". They train 6to 8 hours a week, the meets are all local, and it is more relaxed atmosphere. May be dropping dance next year if I can talk her into it. Being an Asperger child, she is never forthcoming with her innermost feelings so it is hard to get a read on her true feelings for gymnastics... But yesterday, my mom had put on a college gymnastics show then left the room. My daughter and her two friends wandered down from upstairs and began to watch. From the other room, I overheard my daughter say "See what she's doing? I'm going to learn to do that, I can't wait!!". So I guess she does have some enthusiam for gymnastics after all!
 
gosh how much homework does she get ??? My dd is 9 and get 1/2 hour a week. They are expected to read every day but thats it.

Hope the new meds wok out. I also find my children get "off" when they grow - just a thought.
 
Off topic but hi margo! Where have you been? Off getting a real life?!

Back on topic, good luck with the meds. Burnout is something I worry about a lot. My dd won't drop any hours, so all I can do is help her eat and rest well, and keep a close eye.
 
gosh how much homework does she get ??? My dd is 9 and get 1/2 hour a week. They are expected to read every day but thats it.

She is in first grade and gets usually 2 sheets of work and sometimes a short book to read every day. It should take a normal kid about ten minutes, but in ADHD it's a different story.
 
Hi Link Removed :wave:

We had an 8 month break from gym last year, pink and fluffy is just getting back into it at a new club and seems a lot less streesed so its all good.

It can be tough juggleing everything Link Removed catching up on sleep where they can ( non-gym days), homework/meals in the car on the way gym ( we have a 30 min trip each way) are some of the ways we cope, in the end we are all just trying to do the best for our children.

all the best

'Margo
 
Margo sometimes I wish we had a 30 minute commute. We are 10 minutes from gym so she has to eat really quickly - practice starts at four, school lets out at 3:25 (we are walkers), and we have to wait for big sis who is out 5-10 min later. Stop home to change, at which point gymnast daughter decides this is a good time to poop..... you get the idea. But I am trying to keep breathing.
 
New med going well, homework accomodations made, dance class-quit. Yay! Meeting with coach tomorrow...she will not be thrilled when I tell her we are doing level three as I know she wants her in level four... but kiddo's mental health has to come first. Well one day at a time, who knows she may yet be an amazing gymnast... just at her own pace!!
 
Being less busy (for now) could do wonders, adjusted meds or not. I've 2 boys with adhd, probably passed down genetically from yours truly. What I've seen over the past 4-5 years........The more crammed their schedule, the worse it get's. Not in every activity, and, not all of the time, but there are times when they go from one activity to the next, and they just keep collecting "whoopsies". I think when these whoopsies accumulate at a faster rate than they can emotionally process/absorb, they begin a downward spiral where their reactions to "corrections" change......and not in a good way, because in those lifemoments they pretty much stop investing in anything.

Just a little food for thought, nibble on it for a bit.

Just a merciful afterthought.......Kids with adhd, aside from being generally "bright" and beyond on the IQ scale, have the ability to concentrate to extremes. It's that concentration that absorbs them, in my opinion, to the point they appear and function as inattentive. There will be a day when your dd "catches on" and takes off beyond anyone's expectation. Which activity and when? Who knows, but when that moment comes.....it's your signal to get behind and push (supporting) as hard as you're willing.
 

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