Yes, I understand what you are saying Aussie_coach. But there are a couple possible red flags in this particular situation and also, what you describe above I think brings up a larger issue to think about generally that may or may not apply to OP's situation.
According to OP, her child has been at this gym for "quite a while", and obviously assumed she could try out for this particular team at this time. Why did she think that? If that was an unrealistic assumption, the gym may be at fault for not being clear about how try outs work and what the basic team requirements are. At our gym, (if they ask) parents are told that a kid has to not only attain a certain level in Rec, but also be specifically recommended to team try outs by that level rec coach. And we are told that try out does not = getting on the team. No, each and every criteria for "making" team is not spelled out, but we do at least know what level of rec skills are needed to try out. But to find this all out, I did have to ask, and I did have to figure out who to ask, before I got a straight answer.
Also, it sounded to me as if, for OP, this is a single state program- which would mean only local meets? Not Junior Olympic, so no need to be a nationally or even regionally competitive. So it would not seem like a program where a team would be all that picky re body type etc. but as I never heard of this program before I could certainly be wrong.
My impression was OP asked why her kid could not try out, not what the kid should "work on." What a gymnast could "work on" would tend to be an endless list for anyone. "Why can't my kid try out for team" is a much more basic question, and in my opinion there should be a clear (and accurate, rather than untrue) answer. And I agree, a kip is too hard a skill to reasonably expect of any rec gymnast who is training once a week. So not having a kip is likely an untrue answer to the question "why can't my rec kid try out for your team."
Of course I understand what you are saying. Yes, gyms/coaches have their own criteria for team, and it might be difficult to explain this to every parent who wants their kid to try out for team. I am sure this is a problematic area for coaches. But in my opinion, the tendency in this sport to brush inquiring parents off with half truths and out and out untruths is very questionable.
Just because clear, honest communication is difficult, (and it often is) should we continue to accept avoiding it when it comes to gymnastics teams? Maybe we all (gyms, coaches and parents) should be looking at this honestly and trying in whatever small ways we can to better the situation. When basic communication does not happen, when something as simple as team try out requirements is shrouded in mystery, guesses, rumor and confusion, where some win and others lose in a game with obscure, unknowable, or irrational rules, that sets the stage for the creation of a cult like, abusive culture.
Not, of course, saying that this gym in particular is doing anything terrible or even slightly bad. I know nothing about that gym except what the OP said, and I live on the other side of the country from OP. I am talking about a gymnastics-wide issue of poor communication that naturally plays out very differently at different gyms. Practices and policies can be conducive to abuse but no abuse actually occur.
