MAG The power hurdle and the adult tantrum

[momto2js]

It seems that I am asking a lot of questions here this week. Possibly, we are ready for our head coach to return after a summer with the replacements So last night, one of the "fill in" coaches, who is a really good coach technically but is not a great communicator, spend the last 25 minutes of the practice having our diverse group do power hurdle drills, run power hurdle run. Well my kid struggled to separate the power hurdle from the next thing (for 5 years it has been part of something else and not an element on it's own. ) So after falling flat on his face several times, and then several attempts that still were not smooth or good, honestly he quit trying. Because his mode of operation is "if at first you do not succeed deny you ever tried". Add to that the 9 year old reasoning that he can do a good RO, BHS, BT why on earth do I need to power hurdle for 15-30 minutes its BORING!!

I get that my kid did not exert all if his effort to extract a beautiful power hurdle. But the coach just had him do them over and over and over, never once thinking perhaps I should change my approach for this kid. Maybe we need to slow it down? Maybe he needs some verbal ques? I understand that it is a little thing and my (hoping to be) level 6 should have been able to do it. But after the first 10 unsuccessful minutes, and the next 5 where the coach told him that "no gymnast" should struggle with this" and then the next 15 (when the other kids were sent to stretch) nothing in approach changed.

Then after the practice the coach left the gym, came to me and in a very loud voice in front of all the parents and kid said "did you watch the last 30 minutes of practice? We worked power hurdles, "little Jimmy here" can't even do one and he stopped trying, In the next few practices we need to get this issue fixed because, well really it is ridiculous that a level 6 can't isolate a hurdle." I just looked up and said, I'm sorry you had a tough practice, and we will not be back this summer (we are at camp next week thankfully, and head coach will be back next when we return)

I know the coach was frustrated, I know my kid is frustrated. But that conversation should have at least been held privately. Should I just thank my lucky stars the summer is almost over and this coach is only with us once and while during the season? Do I send an email that I would perfer, next time that my son is perceived not to be giving enough effort, he be sent home, and then he can try again a the next practice?? When there is a conflict between an adult and a kid, I tend to think that the adult is at least 50% responsible.

 

[Ali'sMom]

I hope it's okay if I answer on this thread (I have a daughter, not a son), but in my own experience, if I were in your exact same shoes, I'd just let it go. Especially since you'll be gone, then HC will be back. As hard as it is to not address his issue, (the coach, not your son), take a deep breath and be glad that was the last practice with him.
Sometimes addressing these issues ends up blowing up in your face. If you don't have a solid enough relationship with HC, you could come across as the whiny mom, etc.

 

[skschlag]

I kind of agree with ALi's mom, with one addition. When head coach gets back, I would talk to him and mention that he was having difficulty isolating power hurdles, and is this something he needs. I know our gym, all levels does that drill quite a bit, but it does seem to take some time to get it. But I would just bring it up wtih coach that while he was gone, ac was working on these and that your ds had a hard time. It may be something he can help him with and it may not be a worry for him yet.

So frustrating, isn't it?

 

[l.c.o]

Will this temporary coach ever be back? If not, I'd let it go.

Now, if said coach WILL be back, I'd maybe try to either address this with the temporary coach if you are comfortable (from a standpoint of, "this isn't an effective way to coach my kid" standpoint rather than "you're way is wrong" standpoint... That would likely only piss him off), OR again give a casual mention to HC in the same way, calmly and rationally and approach it from a standpoint of "oh hey, this happened, FYI, and does my son need help learning how to power hurdle?"

Good luck. I'd be frustrated too, and I'm glad you're done dealing with said coach for now... At least there's that? Coaches are human and sometimes say/do things when overly frustrated. It's not "right", but it sometimes happens.

LOL, yes what @skschlag said (must have posted at about the same time).

 

[sce]

Coach didn't handle it well, but neither did your kid. Everyone has a not great day. If this was a pattern then I'd be concerned.

It might be good to talk with your ds about how to handle his frustration without shutting down and not trying. I can definitely say that that is a hug frustration for coaches. Also, if your ds does not understand how to do what is asked of him, he may need to learn how to respectfully speak up, there is a difference between back talk and asking for help or clarification.

All that to say, we used to have a caoch that would beat a dead horse, asking for the same thing over and over and getting frustrated when he did not see the result. If this was an ongoing issue I would find a ind way of explaining that your ds might just need it explained an alternate way.