Parents What do you think of this?

[my4buffaloes]

So both my daughters do gymnastics. One competes the other is developmental. Coach says to dd #1 last week "do you need me to have dd#2 to come in here and show you how to do handstands?"

My dd was upset as she has always struggled with handstands. I was offended and think the coach crossed the line. I have no idea if she was joking or not, she is kind of a joker, so maybe that is it. What do you think?

 

[bogwoppit]

I guess maybe they thought they were being funny. But really it wasn't very smart. I would write it off to foot in mouth disease this once, but if it happens more often I would have a chat.

 

[Deleted member D3987]

she was joking. if your daughter didn't fnd it funny let the coach know. i have gymnasts that are sisters, brothers, and both that would have found that funny but they're teenagers.

 

[gymmomtoo]

I'm sure she was joking--our HC would say something like that too and Beth wouldn't find it funny either. And then she'd argue with you about how he really wasn't kidding (yes, Beth, he was).

 

[Iwannabemargo]

weeeeeel, I would have a quiet word with the coach - she may have been joking but comparing siblings has always been a big no-no for me ! There is enough rivalry without stiring up any more - just my opinion.

 

[GymnastJoy]

From your post I'm assuming HC told older dd that younger dd would need to demonstate a proper handstand.

I agree with Bog that it is inappropriate but if it happens again to mention to the coach that older dd does not find it motivating- in fact the opposite.

I can empathize as I also have two dds in gymnastics and the older is fearful that younger will catch up somehow. When the coach talks about how well my younger dd is progressing in front of older dd, I quickly change the subject.

 

[Deleted member D3987]

just to keep this light...i have a brother and a sister that are both level 10's. she is 17 (soon) and he is 15. they thrive on the competition. they "one up" each other all the time during practice and us coaches make a big deal out of it. like i stated above, it can be playful but must be age appropriate.

we also have sisters. the oldest at 15 is a level 10 and the younger at 13 a level 9. we play like this all the time. but they have grown up in a gym culture where you are proud of your siblings accomplishments. they thrive to "one up" their sibling as well as other teamates. with games like "add on" and such and it is all very fun and healthy.

i guess it depends on who is cultivating that gym culture...

 

[my4buffaloes]

I appreciate everyone's responses! She was probably joking, so I guess we won't take it seriously this time. I told dd #1 that if she says something like that again that she should just respond with "that wasn't very funny" or "that wasn't very nice". I think that is an ok thing to say back to the coach that will get the point across. what do you think? If it happens more I think I will talk to the coach (she coaches both dd's), but will let it go for now. Thanks for helping me gain perspective!

 

[mtbmom]

My DD had a coach at a famous but not so nice gym ending in ettes that used to humiliate her by having a lower level gymnast demonstrate a skill she was struggling with. It was not a joke. Hopefully, this is not the case with your daughters, but I would definitely keep my eye on the situation.