Parents What to do when coach style not a good fit?

[GlobalNomad]

I would do what I could to get my dd to the "higher" group with less yelling.

 

[rjb123]

I think you need to give it time. When DD first started team she started working with this coach who TERRIFIED her. She was just loud, tough and had an accent that DD (five at the time) could not understand. The two butted heads a little at first, (coach didn't understand that DD couldn't understand her d/t accent, DD was too shy to admit this...) but now, several years later she ADORES this coach. Literally adores her. She recognizes that her coaching style brings out the best in her and I think that this coach really "gets" DD and what makes her tick. It took time, some talks, patience, but in the end it was a great growth opportunity for DD, and she can't even remember NOT liking this coach!

 

[SurpriseGymMom]

I'm pretty much just going to echo what everyone has said:give it time and check the coach out for yourself. Big difference between being loud and structured vs yelling and belittling. What little kids perceive as yelling, often isn't (in a gym setting especially, we do often have to contend with a lot of noise and being loud is sometimes necessary!).
As a coach, I most definitely fall in the "loud" category. I am by nature a loud person and I also run my classes VERY structured. I could see where if you were to just walk in and catch a moment, you could see me as "mean"... But if you stay and watch more, you would see that I also cheer the loudest for "my" kids when they do something great or overcome a hurdle, I care for them when they get hurt, I hug them when they need it and I support them in becoming great little persons as well as gymnasts.

My DD had one coach she was scared of when she started developmental team. She thought she was "mean". Fast forward to going into team and having this coach as her head coach...she absolutely loves her! Yes, this coach is still strict and still not the warm, fuzzy, huggy type BUT the girls all know this coach is fair, kind and cares for them both as people and as gymnasts. They know that if they get a kudos from this coach, they really earned it and it means a lot to them.

 

[xxStumpyxx]

I never even considered that some coaches are not a good fit, my daughter was in a mixed aged development group for a year and made progress in gymnastics but not as much as she could have, some of the problem was social and some was due to coaching style now I look back on it.

My daughter has just started a new group with more hours and an extra day, there are 7 girls in the group and two coaches, these coaches are more hands on especially when conditioning, in pull ups there has been a big improvememt, instead of being left to struggle on their own they now have help if they cannot do it in their own.

The differences in coaching styles had an effect on my young daughter, she has gone from being slightly withdrawn in the gym, on the outside and hanging back avoiding the coach, to a bouncy happy child full of energy , I know it is early days but I hope this continues. My daughter loved her old coach but admitted that she was not happy or comfortable in her old group, that might be due to my daughters personality of suspected condition (suspected Apsergers / Autism).

Also it doesn't pay for a coach to be a yeller in our gym this can cause you to get suspended if you doing it in a mean way instead of just shouting to make your self heard in a noisy gym.

 

[GlobalNomad]

So, to summarize between the two posts:

Your dd was placed in a "higher" group with motivated athletes and a coach she likes.

You're considering putting her into a "lower" group with less focused athletes and a coach that yells.

Your child is telling you that she would rather quit gymnastics than be in this "lower" grouping.

I do agree with the others that a child can get used to a coach. But, with all of the pieces between the two posts, I really think you should consider keeping her in the group that she was originally placed. Your gym just might know what they are doing and may have put her there for a reason, possibly knowing it's the best fit for her.

From my experience, team parents do tend to help each other. Have you tried to carpool?

 

[JennC4]

At least try and if it doesn't go well explore your options