Parents When did you “know”?

[Puff]

I love all of what you wrote, but especially "she started advocating for herself". That is such a crucial skill to be proud of, that should be part the process. I feel like there's a less than 20% success rate when parents advocate for the kid (unless it means changing gyms but that can add a new layer of trauma), but maybe up to a 50% success rate when the kid advocates for themselves. Sadly, with a lot of coaches there is no advocating, it's my way or the highway. And sometimes the advocating just isn't well-reasoned, but the discussion itself can have value. I guess maybe it's because my daughter is older and a little bit known, but she has a coach on staff now that regularly asks her opinion of where they are at, the amount of numbers, what drills are helping, etc. It's been kind of shocking, incredibly refreshing, and also a feeling of well yeah of course she should be a participant in the decisions being made about her training.

 

[NYCMom]

I'm going to answer the question differently because my daughter graduated high school as a second year level 9.

By middle school it was clear she had neither the skill progression or timeline for a path to college gymnastics. But she loved what she was doing and set herself a goal of competing through the end of high school. I knew she would make that goal when she kept going even after ALL her peers had retired, when she built skills laterally when she wasn't making vertical growth, when she worked through/around mental blocks, when she maturely accepted repeating levels as necessary, and when she started advocating for herself with her coaches. She added a high school sport which helped build her strengths differently - funnily enough improving her gymnastics and helping keep her mostly free from injury - but gymnastics was still her primary sport and prioritized when their were conflicts. I was so proud of her being recognized as a graduating senior at her gym, states, and regionals because I knew that she had met her goal and that she felt satisfied with making the most of her gymnastics experience that she could.

I wanted to bring this perspective because success will look different for each athlete, and it is fulfilling as a parent to see the turning points towards a goal actually be important life skills.

I love this SO much!!! Congratulations to your daughter for accomplishing her goal.

 

[#BGymnast]

She was 9

 

[Happyfeet]

I was at a gym one time goofing around with a friend (we were around 16yrs or something) and she said want to meet an Olympian? And proceeded to point out a small child who was probably around 8yrs old at the time certainly not older than 10yrs. She said she’s going to be in the Olympics, I’ll bet you money.

Well the friend was wrong, she never did make the Olympics but got a full ride scholarship to UCLA. I guess sometimes you just know.

 

[josie55]

Well the friend was wrong, she never did make the Olympics but got a full ride scholarship to UCLA. I guess sometimes you just know.

FWIW I remember being a wide-eyed L3 gym mom, talking to a much more experienced gym mom (her older daughter was a promising L7 I think) and she told me that the UCLA coach was at the gym that day and "wanted to sign the whole group (of L7s) right there." I was so impressed. Needless to say, none of them ended up at UCLA. I think one quit shortly thereafter, one burnt out at L8 or 9, a couple made it onto ivy teams (no slouches, obviously, but from a gymnastics perspective not UCLA). Anyway, you really don't ever truly "know."

 

[Ty’s Dad]

The question is as a parent when did you know. You tagged me earlier and I was going to leave it alone, but what does injuries or a burn out have to do with a parent knowing when your kid is good enough for D1?

 

[NYCMom]

The question is as a parent when did you know. You tagged me earlier and I was going to leave it alone, but what does injuries or a burn out have to do with a parent knowing when your kid is good enough for D1?

Yeah, my original question was somewhat self-limiting in that I was curious to know whether parents of gymnasts who had actually made it to certain levels could look back and remember a time when things seemed to change or click. I completely understand that you can’t actually know with 100% certainty that it WILL happen until it DOES happen. But I do think you can (as you have) look back after it does happen and remember a time or a season when things changed and D1 or elite or D3 or competing through senior year became a real possibility as opposed to just a dream. For example in my own life, I “knew” I was going to qualify for the Boston marathon after I ran my second marathon, even though I was still many minutes away from the standard. It didn’t happen for many years and I very well could have gotten injured or burned out along the way, but that doesn’t change the fact that I can point to the time when I knew it would happen.

 

[josie55]

That makes sense. I was reading your question in a different way, and think that a pretty big part of "what it takes" to make it to D1 or elite is being healthy and not burnt out. It's semantics, though.

Congrats on the marathon!