Parents When is time to move on?

[Kara]

Yes I think that’s my main thought, if this is the right place long term for us. I’m super big on my word so that’s striking a nerve, we also have a super flexible school schedule so I can make most things work, so maybe the environment of a gym wanting 17.5 hrs at level 3/4 5 days a week no other commitment, for my kiddo isn’t the right place. She will be at 10.5 with the change. I think it’s a lot bigger than the schedule change.

Wait, I'm confused, does OP have two accounts, or is this a different child?

 

[Amumcalledove]

There seems to be a strong assumption in the gym world that gym is the most important thing for any kiddo/family.
I feel your frustration with the change of scheduling. We too balance out our activities and each season/stage shuffle round for the best fit, including my work commitments.
I wouldn’t expect the gym to work around me or my kiddo but I would and have found it unreasonable when trainings are just changed and assumed that everyone will just accommodate to this.
Yes things change, but this can be communicated not assumed.
Fortunately not our team but we had one of the gyms teams - XCel equivalent where coaches just announced different days and number of days, starting the next week. Caused a lot of drama, enough to revert back to original schedule.
Well that was a bit more of a rant than I intended!

 

[JPC13]

There seems to be a strong assumption in the gym world that gym is the most important thing for any kiddo/family.
I feel your frustration with the change of scheduling. We too balance out our activities and each season/stage shuffle round for the best fit, including my work commitments.
I wouldn’t expect the gym to work around me or my kiddo but I would and have found it unreasonable when trainings are just changed and assumed that everyone will just accommodate to this.
Yes things change, but this can be communicated not assumed.
Fortunately not our team but we had one of the gyms teams - XCel equivalent where coaches just announced different days and number of days, starting the next week. Caused a lot of drama, enough to revert back to original schedule.
Well that was a bit more of a rant than I intended!

I totally agree with you, but if your kid is in the gym five times a week, doing essentially 20 hours a week, as a level 3 at a gym like WOGA (which seems to have a reputation as a meat grinder, fair or unfair) I think the expectation is that gym is the most important thing. If it's not, that might not be the best place for you, when there's a whole new crop of 6 year old level 3s that they would be happy to replace your kid with.

 

[JBS]

Had this same situation with a kid some time ago. I said "pick"... can't do high level of both sports. She did... she is off to college on a full ride swimming scholarship next year. Picking is not a bad thing.

I gotta say... as a parent I understand a bit about different activities... maybe try to fit a recreational activity in with competitive gym... that's good.

As a coach... I'm sick of competing with...

• dance
• tennis
• sailing
• lego robotics club
• downhill ski club
• water ski team
• rock climbing
• etc... etc.

I'm going to tell you what you need to hear at this point... then I'm just going to run the team as it needs to be run. If I need to change workout because I have a staffing issue or what not... I'm not considering lego robotics club.

What if you showed up for practice and there was a sign that said... "Please workout on your own on Tuesdays as I am out sailing... and Thursdays too... tennis on Thursdays."

 

[Amumcalledove]

I totally agree with you, but if your kid is in the gym five times a week, doing essentially 20 hours a week, as a level 3 at a gym like WOGA (which seems to have a reputation as a meat grinder, fair or unfair) I think the expectation is that gym is the most important thing. If it's not, that might not be the best place for you, when there's a whole new crop of 6 year old level 3s that they would be happy to replace your kid with.

Absolutely but then why would they offer a flexible program (I may have misunderstood the OP)- I’m not trying to be critical of any one way of doing a gym program, but be upfront about it and stick to it.

 

[wandrewsjr]

Had this same situation with a kid some time ago. I said "pick"... can't do high level of both sports. She did... she is off to college on a full ride swimming scholarship next year. Picking is not a bad thing.

This may be a difference of opinion, but I wouldn’t consider level 3 to be a “high level” of gymnastics. Did you ask this gymnast to pick when she was a 7 year old level 3?

 

[GYMMOMSROCK88!]

This may be a difference of opinion, but I wouldn’t consider level 3 to be a “high level” of gymnastics. Did you ask this gymnast to pick when she was a 7 year old level 3?

I get picking as an optional or level 9/10 absolutely…but level 3 seems like I said extreme this is baby stuff.

 

[gymgal]

I get picking as an optional or level 9/10 absolutely…but level 3 seems like I said extreme this is baby stuff.

The problem is that your gym does not view it that way given the number of hours for L3. 3x/week for a few hours each day is more typical for L3. 17hrs for this level shows the gym is very committed to high level gymnastics and expects full commitment. Is it crazy? That's up for debate. I would say yes and would not want to be part of that type of program but others would be fine with it (as evidenced by the families in your gym).

As long as they are willing to let her drop that extra day, I wouldn't worry about it. Yes, it is possible that she may fall behind her teammates and have to repeat but she gets to stay in dance. trade-offs. However, if dance will continue beyond this year, you may need to look into a different gym with more reasonable hours and schedules. As for placing her in another training group to accommodate, that's doubtful in this type of gym. A more flexible one would be fine with it.

 

[raenndrops]

I get picking as an optional or level 9/10 absolutely…but level 3 seems like I said extreme this is baby stuff.

Just accept the reduction in hours for this season. There really is no reason a L3 can't do well on 9 hours a week.
In our gym, ALL levels practice 7.5 hours a week (2.5 hours x 3 days). Mine is an Xcel Gold with hopes of moving up to Platinum mid-season ... but she only practices 3 - 5.5 hours a week.
She had been practicing gymnastics around dance and her driver's schedule. Last year, it was competition dance 2-3 days a week. This year, it was only doing classes. This past Tuesday, she made the tough decision to quit dance. With gym and dance, on top of multiple honors classes and a college class, it was too much. She checked her grades Tuesday and she had a C in one class. That was enough for her to make a change to have more time for studying. She is hoping with the extra free time she might be able to go to gym all 3 days each week.

 

[JPC13]

I get picking as an optional or level 9/10 absolutely…but level 3 seems like I said extreme this is baby stuff.

If you make level 10 and you haven’t picked years in advance then you’re a super human.

I agree that picking at level 3 is premature… at a normal gym. You’re not at a normal gym.

 

[GymAir]

Had this same situation with a kid some time ago. I said "pick"... can't do high level of both sports. She did... she is off to college on a full ride swimming scholarship next year. Picking is not a bad thing.

I gotta say... as a parent I understand a bit about different activities... maybe try to fit a recreational activity in with competitive gym... that's good.

As a coach... I'm sick of competing with...

• dance
• tennis
• sailing
• lego robotics club
• downhill ski club
• water ski team
• rock climbing
• etc... etc.

I'm going to tell you what you need to hear at this point... then I'm just going to run the team as it needs to be run. If I need to change workout because I have a staffing issue or what not... I'm not considering lego robotics club.

What if you showed up for practice and there was a sign that said... "Please workout on your own on Tuesdays as I am out sailing... and Thursdays too... tennis on Thursdays."

I agree, but if I’m putting gymnastics first (and I do) and scheduling work and all other sibling activities around it, I really need it to not be a moving target, at least for the season!

 

[Amumcalledove]

Had this same situation with a kid some time ago. I said "pick"... can't do high level of both sports. She did... she is off to college on a full ride swimming scholarship next year. Picking is not a bad thing.

I gotta say... as a parent I understand a bit about different activities... maybe try to fit a recreational activity in with competitive gym... that's good.

As a coach... I'm sick of competing with...

• dance
• tennis
• sailing
• lego robotics club
• downhill ski club
• water ski team
• rock climbing
• etc... etc.

I'm going to tell you what you need to hear at this point... then I'm just going to run the team as it needs to be run. If I need to change workout because I have a staffing issue or what not... I'm not considering lego robotics club.

What if you showed up for practice and there was a sign that said... "Please workout on your own on Tuesdays as I am out sailing... and Thursdays too... tennis on Thursdays."

Had this same situation with a kid some time ago. I said "pick"... can't do high level of both sports. She did... she is off to college on a full ride swimming scholarship next year. Picking is not a bad thing.

I gotta say... as a parent I understand a bit about different activities... maybe try to fit a recreational activity in with competitive gym... that's good.

As a coach... I'm sick of competing with...

• dance
• tennis
• sailing
• lego robotics club
• downhill ski club
• water ski team
• rock climbing
• etc... etc.

I'm going to tell you what you need to hear at this point... then I'm just going to run the team as it needs to be run. If I need to change workout because I have a staffing issue or what not... I'm not considering lego robotics club.

What if you showed up for practice and there was a sign that said... "Please workout on your own on Tuesdays as I am out sailing... and Thursdays too... tennis on Thursdays."

This is why communication is so important - this wouldn’t work for us. If practice is usually Tuesday and Thursday say, I’ll plan around that. But if it changes time or day, because of staffing or team rosters then nope - most days because of work. Can people really do this?

 

[JBS]

This may be a difference of opinion, but I wouldn’t consider level 3 to be a “high level” of gymnastics. Did you ask this gymnast to pick when she was a 7 year old level 3?

She was a Level 4 and the family was a known high performance family and made it very clear that they were looking for a scholarship. She would have been doing 9 days of workouts between the two sports.

She would have missed 2 of her four gym workouts… so 6 of 12 hours. She had no shot at a gymnastics scholarship either.

I did not tell the gymnast to “pick”… told the parents.

 

[Carly]

I get picking as an optional or level 9/10 absolutely…but level 3 seems like I said extreme this is baby stuff.

I do agree with what others are saying that maybe this is not the right gym for your dd if she wants to do both and cannot find the time. 17 hours is extremely high for L3. DD's gym is 10 hours for 3, 12 hours for 4 & 5, 16 hours for 6 & 7. Then 20 hours and up for 8-10. The girls place very high at meets and they have many girls competing D1 (a few high ranking colleges) and D3.

 

[GYMMOMSROCK88!]

The problem is that your gym does not view it that way given the number of hours for L3. 3x/week for a few hours each day is more typical for L3. 17hrs for this level shows the gym is very committed to high level gymnastics and expects full commitment. Is it crazy? That's up for debate. I would say yes and would not want to be part of that type of program but others would be fine with it (as evidenced by the families in your gym).

As long as they are willing to let her drop that extra day, I wouldn't worry about it. Yes, it is possible that she may fall behind her teammates and have to repeat but she gets to stay in dance. trade-offs. However, if dance will continue beyond this year, you may need to look into a different gym with more reasonable hours and schedules. As for placing her in another training group to accommodate, that's doubtful in this type of gym. A more flexible one would be fine with it.

I’ve completely come to this conclusion that’s something we will look into and determine what she wants once the season ends. I think this is very sound logical advice.

 

[Flipsrus]

That's too many hours. She's training like a college gymnast for level 3. Find another gym.

 

[JBS]

Many programs and coaches still do have the mindset that “team is team”. After all… most of these programs do offer recreational programs with much less commitment. All of the programs I listed above fit very well with out recreational program. We have classes almost every day to choose from and you can switch at will when sailing turns to Lego robotics clubs and then to downhill skiing.

 

[JBS]

Also… 17 hours at L3 is definitely above average. Not even a single program in our entire state that does this many hours at L3.

 

[GYMMOMSROCK88!]

She was a Level 4 and the family was a known high performance family and made it very clear that they were looking for a scholarship. She would have been doing 9 days of workouts between the two sports.

She would have missed 2 of her four gym workouts… so 6 of 12 hours. She had no shot at a gymnastics scholarship either.

I did not tell the gymnast to “pick”… told the parents.

No shot at level 4… how can you tell that young/early on. What are you looking for ? Wouldn’t they need to be further along to see scholarship potential? I say this as a parent who has no gymnastics background it’s a honest question.

 

[GYMMOMSROCK88!]

Just accept the reduction in hours for this season. There really is no reason a L3 can't do well on 9 hours a week.
In our gym, ALL levels practice 7.5 hours a week (2.5 hours x 3 days). Mine is an Xcel Gold with hopes of moving up to Platinum mid-season ... but she only practices 3 - 5.5 hours a week.
She had been practicing gymnastics around dance and her driver's schedule. Last year, it was competition dance 2-3 days a week. This year, it was only doing classes. This past Tuesday, she made the tough decision to quit dance. With gym and dance, on top of multiple honors classes and a college class, it was too much. She checked her grades Tuesday and she had a C in one class. That was enough for her to make a change to have more time for studying. She is hoping with the extra free time she might be able to go to gym all 3 days each week.

Yes… I think accepting and reevaluation later is the best plan. Once she goes to 4, we will look at rec dance only.