Why such a strong reaction?

[Linsul]

It makes me laugh too, I have to mock it a bit. From the relative safety that in a strong program (holla at my gym, SHAMELESS!) another place can take pieces here and there and not do as well since it's removed from the overall program. Still, part of me is sympathetic knowing what some owners have gone through to realize gym ownership, especially one whose life has been gymnastics. It's their passion, life, livelihood, and they are incredibly open with years of knowledge to their coaches. Getting caught between that and a parent with a situation can be tricky, but with utmost respect for the contributions of both you can get through it. I've put on the mediator hat before, and watched the smoke on a bridge that was about to burn go out. I've danced around the flames of one or two though as well if I'm being honest. DO WORK!

 

[gymdog]

Well if people want to keep things secret, that's their prerogative. But I mean, most likely what they're doing isn't unheard of anyway, so it's kind of like whatever to me.

Also, unless we keep gymnastics a viable, successful sport, it doesn't matter how amazing or wonderful your training methods are, because we will not have a sport and participants for them to be seen. It's pretty much in EVERYONE'S best interest to support gymnastics, and that doesn't just mean the relatively small amount of athletes you work with.

 

[Deleted member D3987]

and certainly i will be sharing anything i know...can't help it but the word "secrets" still make me laugh.

 

[nevertooold]

and certainly i will be sharing anything i know...can't help it but the word "secrets" still make me laugh.

Does that include IRL?

As in coaches could come to your gym for a week this summer and learn from you/your staff for reasonable compensation for your time and experience?

Or if that is not something you offer maybe you could recommend someone who does?

 

[Deleted member D3987]

i don't know what IRL means but of course anyone interested comes to our gym. a lot of that does take place in the summer but we do a lot during the season also. it depends on what the needs are of the coaches that we help and what their athletes need when they come along. and we usually don't charge...

 

[LMV]

i don't know what IRL means but of course anyone interested comes to our gym. a lot of that does take place in the summer but we do a lot during the season also. it depends on what the needs are of the coaches that we help and what their athletes need when they come along. and we usually don't charge...

Ok my kids will be proud of me...I think IRL=In Real Life [as opposed to fake life you know ]

 

[gymdog]

and certainly i will be sharing anything i know...can't help it but the word "secrets" still make me laugh.

Certainly, I can tell you have the best interests of all gymnasts at heart. I didn't mean to my direct my comments at any of the coaches in the thread. I just didn't want the parents to think all coaches think of it as a zero sum game to be won at every level. Overall I do believe most reasonable people involved with this sport have the best interests of all the kids participating at heart and want to see it remain a viable sport.

 

[Linsul]

When I post something specific, I get the feeling that it's getting twisted into something that it's not to fit into someones large scale, general point about the sport as a whole. I could be wrong, but in case I'm not, I don't always post on things I practice or endorse. When things come up that I've seen or experienced, I generally join in with the intent to elaborate, not promote. I don't apologize at all for that, as the Chalk Bucket isn't the personal PR campaign for me that I could make it. If I post something that isn't sunshine and rainbows, but is on topic, it feels pretty filthy to be used as a springboard/non-specific example for the nastier generalities.

 

[gymdog]

When I post something specific, I get the feeling that it's getting twisted into something that it's not to fit into someones large scale, general point about the sport as a whole. I could be wrong, but in case I'm not, I don't always post on things I practice or endorse. When things come up that I've seen or experienced, I generally join in with the intent to elaborate, not promote. I don't apologize at all for that, as the Chalk Bucket isn't the personal PR campaign for me that I could make it. If I post something that isn't sunshine and rainbows, but is on topic, it feels pretty filthy to be used as a springboard/non-specific example for the nastier generalities.

I'm not sure if this is response to me or if I understand what you mean, but I did mention in my previous post that I was not talking about any coaches here. I was replying to an example brought up in the thread that coaches are concerned about keeping coaching and spotting methods secret. Perhaps the moderators can weigh in on what is considered on and off topic posting. As always, if they believe my posts are not appropriate, I fully understand they can be deleted and I would have no hard feelings about that.

 

[Bella's Mom]

Certainly, I can tell you have the best interests of all gymnasts at heart. I didn't mean to my direct my comments at any of the coaches in the thread. I just didn't want the parents to think all coaches think of it as a zero sum game to be won at every level. Overall I do believe most reasonable people involved with this sport have the best interests of all the kids participating at heart and want to see it remain a viable sport.

I totally believe this. Our coaches are competitive and want to win. They work hard to develop our children into gymnasts. But I have also seen countless examples to show that they also want our children to be happy children as well. My own experience with my daughter's behavior just solidified that. Our coaches have said that they believe it takes a village to raise a child and if that child wants to be a gymnast, then we all (gymnast, coaches, parents) work as a team to help that child go as far as they want.

LOL....I don't think the monetary rewards that most coaches get from being a coach would satisfy if they didn't love children and want the best for them.

And this is why at this point, I cannot imagine leaving our gym. Because I know how much the coaches love my daughter (even when she is a BRAT!) and I've seen how much she loves them. To her, gym is just extended family..... to the point that she doesn't understand why it isn't appropriate why she can't ask her coaches if she can come home with them to spend the night.

 

[cher062]

LOL....I don't think the monetary rewards that most coaches get from being a coach would satisfy if they didn't love children and want the best for them.

And this is why at this point, I cannot imagine leaving our gym. Because I know how much the coaches love my daughter (even when she is a BRAT!) and I've seen how much she loves them. To her, gym is just extended family..... to the point that she doesn't understand why it isn't appropriate why she can't ask her coaches if she can come home with them to spend the night.

I think any teaching/coaching position is underpaid and is done for their love of children. I've been in the education field for over 20 years and believe me it isn't the pay that keeps me in this field. I think everyone in these fields do it because they have a calling for it and love working with children. I hope all the kids have the same relationship as your DD has - my DD now after a year at new gym loves her coaches, teammates and just can't get enough of them. She had that at the old gym too but in the last year when the "new team coach" came in that was when things changed - Unfortunatly that loving feeling isn't always felt by all and that is when families should consider looking around, also many gymnasts just outgrow their gym too because they have gone past the skill levels offered by the program offered at their gym. It happens.

No one should feel guilty, disloyal or anything else if they feel they would like to check out other gyms and no gym should make the family or gymnasts feel that way.

 

[AGM78910]

Thanks for the insight. I felt that it was more than just chat. The gym owners in this area all know each other very well and most have been in business for over 10 years. But we were only after leotards (and got some great half price Shawn Johnson leos) so I felt it was a bit inappropriate.

 

[jdf]

My daughter left her first gym because:
-when we asked for information on our daughter's progress, they would never answer us, and talk about other girls by name and tell us how good or bad these other girls were.
-the booster club was always collecting more money to pay the owner, and browbeating us to contribute even more.
-the coaches were cliquey with certain families, and would walk by others without even a word.
-the coaches never gave important news to the parents- it was always told to the girl, and we were left out of the loop and yet still held accountable.
-the coaches did private coaching at the same time as team practice
That said, they were kind to my daughter and put a lot of effort into coaching her. I feel like we were right to move her, but I still feel guilty.

 

[MissBear]

Perhaps it is different here because the majority of competitive coaches are volunteers, yes as in 6-20 hours a week for free. I also think in general there are smaller teams and smaller groups here than in the US. If we have put our time, effort and planning into a child and tried our hardest for them it is hard when mum or dad decides to switch. I have found it the most difficult when gymnasts leave because, for example, they like the team bonding activities at gym y, but never approached any coach to express their interest in an activity or ask if they could set up a group to organise one. I strongly feel that rec and preschool gymnastics is a business, but competitive gymnastics is different.
Of course, if a different gym is in the best interests of a child, like if they have outgrown the facilities or skill level of the gym then that should be raised with coach and parents together to discuss the options available.

 

[BachFlyer]

Of course, if a different gym is in the best interests of a child, like if they have outgrown the facilities or skill level of the gym then that should be raised with coach and parents together to discuss the options available.

As somewhat of a new parent to this whole gymnastics thing, I wish I knew how to translate this into a real life converstaion that doesn't turn murky with emotion!

My daughter is quickly moving up, and although I don't believe she's outgrown her current gym YET, I think there is a strong likelihood that she will in the next few years. Especially specific to two events where our entire team struggles. I find myself seriously wondering if she would get more out of a better program. If she is putting all of this time and effort into training, and has a fair amount of talent, maybe she would be even more fulfilled at a gym where the coaches could help her more. She might not be in the category of elite gymnasts, but WHAT IF she could be college material with the right coaching? I don't know - I truly wish that I felt I could talk openly to the coaches about their plans as a gym, and also their plans for my kid - as in, what is the solution to the problem with team-wide problem with XXX event? Or, do you have plans to bring on more experienced coaches that can take our good program up to a great program. But...anytime I've asked about less serious things, I feel like they just brush question aside, and kind of just "try to make me feel better that it is all fine" and want me to think they have a handle on it. Because I'm not a very pushy parent and I don't want to cause waves - it's hard for me to force the converstation without worrying that I'm going to upset the coaches. I know they love my kid, and they are doing the best they can with the resources they have - but the problem is that their love for her and best intentions don't change the fact that they are lacking in certain areas.

And now, after reading this thread, I almost feel like it would be better to consider a change sooner versus a few years later. Before there is even more time and energy invested, and before there is more room for disappointment.

I guess what I'm saying is that it's a very grey area. Change (or contemplating change) IS hard, for the athelete and coach, but also for the parent. Many times we as a parent are tasked with evaluating a situation that our children CAN'T because they aren't really old enough, and our coaches don't want to because they are attached to our child as an athelete.

It feel like I'm caught on the fence, with no where to turn to but the awesome folks here at Chalkbucket! I'm open to feedback!

 

[bogwoppit]

Apach906, my advice is to start a new thread on the issue, to save it get buried here or becoming a hijack. Please do be careful not to give too much away about your situation, I know for sure that more than two families have been thrown out of their gyms because their clubs found out that they had posted too that they were thinking of gym shopping here. You should still be able to get good advice, but be careful with names, dates, levels and gym names.

 

[BachFlyer]

Noted, thanks