Anon Am I worrying too much about a 6yr old?

[Anonymous (4935)]

DD just turned 6. She struggled with paying attention and coachability at her last gym. She has been doing gymnastics at a recreation level for a couple of years. She was consistently passed over for preteam and team due to lack of listening skills.

She does struggle with listening and station work and flat out refuses to follow certain coaches’ directions. The problem is she is amazingly well behaved for other coaches and we have zero problems in school.

I have recently moved her to a different gym. She was immediately put on their elite team (unsure what level is would be as it’s based on age here) and the coach said she hasn’t seen a child with as much talent and ability in a long time. The problem is this gym’s standards are significantly different than my daughter’s previous gym. I have noticed the girls’ forms are not tight, they don’t break down the moves into shapes and drills, and the atmosphere is extremely laid back. It’s not in the US, but I feel like it’s a Rec track bc all of the girls (including my daughter now) are SO happy. They laugh and have fun and i haven’t seen my daughter so excited about gymnastics is maybe a year!

I want to be happy because she is happy. Honestly due to her behaviour I really don’t have an option to keep her in the “better” gym because she is levelled so far down due to behaviour, it’s painful for everyone. The coaches have really tried to work with her there, but we were all frustrated to see how talent she is but not emotionally/cognitively capable of matching her physical abilities.

I guess I’m looking to see if anyone has gone this path before and how it turned out for them? My biggest concerns here is if she learns skills incorrectly and develops bad habits (she is in there doing back walkovers on a low beam as I type) and would have never been allowed to do one on the floor much less a beam at her old gym. Or worse, I’m afraid she’ll get injured from poor form.

We will move to the US in 18-24 months, so will also have to learn US standards, so I’m also worried about that.

Does anyone have any advice? She is happy and so I’m trying to be happy, but I’m also worried about injury and limiting her future opportunities. I’ve even considered a clean break (ie focus on another sport) might be better than learning bad habits.

Any thoughts or am I just being overly dramatic/anxious? I think she enjoys being a big fish in a small pond and having more freedom to try skills, and I realise she is 6- no D1 scholarships are being given out this week lol., But, I also believe she has significant talent and she is doing so well right now bc she had coaches that emphasised the details and moved at a glacial pace to ensure no injuries and perfect form.

 

[Anonymous (ac4a)]

This might be insensitive, but it's better to be clear and direct for your benefit. Your daughter just turned 6! The ability of anyone, even an Olympic coach to identify a 5 yo as an elite talent does not exist. Some precursors might indicate the potential to develop, but that is all it is, potential. Also, unless you are an ex-elite or high-level gymnast, I am skeptical that you can ascertain proper technique/form/talent at this age. I still don't know what the heck my DD does during training or competitions (I can name about 2 skills) and she has been doing this for close to 10 years. I can't remember but I don't think much was happening in the gym at age 5-6 other than tumbling over and doing splits. Ultimately, maybe your DD is super talented, but at this age it is irrelevant. Take what a coach tells you as a compliment, smile, and forget about it. Let her have fun and develop that way. There will be a time when you will have more relevant information and data points to guide you on the "I want her to reach her full potential" path., maybe 3 years from now. That is why USAG calls it the developmental program. Until then if she is happy and safe, then she is in a good place.

Also, proper form all day. Colleges value that over big skills and proper form keeps gymnasts safe from acute and repetitive injuries when they start doing those big girl skills. Proper form lays the foundation blocks to build up to harder skills. I have known some girls that have come to our gym and had to completely relearn a skill from the ground up because their form was so bad when they got here even though they could "do" said skill.

 

[Anonymous (c41b)]

Is the future of your family predicated on how she does in gymnastics? If she doesn't make the Olympic team someday is she going to be considered a failure in life?

The most important skill that any athlete needs to have is a desire to be great in their chosen sport. If she loves gymnastics there then let her love it. Relax - She won't be correctly/incorrectly learning any skills on pre-team that could stop her from being an upper level gymnast someday. There will be a time when strict attention will need to be paid to all portions of her skills, but that time is not at 6 years old.

 

[Anonymous (532e)]

She is six years old. She is moving and loving it. All is well. So yeah, I think you are overthinking this. Let her be a kid. You already tried the stern approach with her at the other gym, it did not work at all. So what's there to loose at the moment?