JoyAvenueMom
Proud Parent
- Aug 24, 2012
- 525
- 795
My dh is a wonderful, loving dad. My ds (10) plays sports, and dh (who played varsity sports in HS) has helped coach. My older dd was in color guard with marching band, and that was something else my dh knew well from personal experience. He became an active volunteer parent during her years in that activity.
DH and I expect our kids give their best effort in everything, from school to sports, to relationships. DH is also very competetive and hates to lose. (I have scars from our one year of co-ed softball). With our other children, he understood the activities and what it means to "do a good job" and "put forth your best effort". They were always competing with kids their own ages. It's his "ignorance" of gymnastics that is really stressing him out.
We agreed to let DD move up this year (from L4 to Preo op Bronze/Intermediate Optionals AAU) for two reasons: 1) her training hours doubled to 12 hours per week, and 2) she would have been the only repeater (others moved or quit). As a result, she is competing as an 8 year old in 8-10 and 8-11 year old age groups, without having as many skills as most. This has meant finishing with decent scores (since it is rec and AAU) but at the bottom of the group. She has performed her routines well, and is steadily improving, so she is happy and I am happy. However, DAD is having trouble swallowing his pride.
We don't have huge issues, so please don't go down the tangent of him ruining this sport for my daughter. He continues to tell her he is proud of her, and that he knows she works hard. I can just see the pain in his face, and I know it really bothers him when she finished dead last. I have found this site to be invaluable in learning about the sport, and helping me stay sane. I am trying find ways to help dh begin to gain a better understanding of the complexity, and why she is doing great even if she isn't winning. I want this experience to be fun for him too.
Any suggestions for the care of keeping of gym dads would be greatly appreciated.
DH and I expect our kids give their best effort in everything, from school to sports, to relationships. DH is also very competetive and hates to lose. (I have scars from our one year of co-ed softball). With our other children, he understood the activities and what it means to "do a good job" and "put forth your best effort". They were always competing with kids their own ages. It's his "ignorance" of gymnastics that is really stressing him out.
We agreed to let DD move up this year (from L4 to Preo op Bronze/Intermediate Optionals AAU) for two reasons: 1) her training hours doubled to 12 hours per week, and 2) she would have been the only repeater (others moved or quit). As a result, she is competing as an 8 year old in 8-10 and 8-11 year old age groups, without having as many skills as most. This has meant finishing with decent scores (since it is rec and AAU) but at the bottom of the group. She has performed her routines well, and is steadily improving, so she is happy and I am happy. However, DAD is having trouble swallowing his pride.
We don't have huge issues, so please don't go down the tangent of him ruining this sport for my daughter. He continues to tell her he is proud of her, and that he knows she works hard. I can just see the pain in his face, and I know it really bothers him when she finished dead last. I have found this site to be invaluable in learning about the sport, and helping me stay sane. I am trying find ways to help dh begin to gain a better understanding of the complexity, and why she is doing great even if she isn't winning. I want this experience to be fun for him too.
Any suggestions for the care of keeping of gym dads would be greatly appreciated.