Coaches Crazy Parents

[caraburn]

Hi Everyone!

I am the head level 5/6 coach at my gym and this is my first year as head coach. I have almost 20 girls practicing at once and many of them were moved up before they were ready. It was not my decision to move these girls up because they had already been told they were moving up by the time I started coaching and the coach before me taught them many skills the wrong way, etc.. So, naturally, many of the girls are having a less than satisfactory meet season so far. They have all had incredible improvements but when they were so far behind there was no way I was going to have them ready to have a spectacular season. Well, parents are blaming me for this instead of the coach that actually had them for the majority of the past year, or realizing that they just werent ready, overlooking the improvements they've made. I've only had the 6's for two months. All the complaining is rubbing off on the kids and now they won't work or listen to me, I have no respect. It's been a nightmare. I get hate calls all the time from parents and it ridiculous. My boss tells me I'm doing an amazing job with the girls, but the parents want 1st places and 9's on every event and it's just not possible right now, but they won't back off. What do I do?

 

[gymmomntc2e6]

Would your boss be supportive of a L5/6 team meeting with you, boss and parents to set the record straight. Try to be able to show specific improvements made, required skills for their level, what skills they were missing or doing incorrectly when you took over and that you have worked hard to fix those / or teach them.

As a parent I would LOVE 1st place and 9's but hey, let's be realistic - not always going to happen all the time, for many reasons.

I wish you luck, you sound like a wonderful coach.

 

[gymnut1]

Hang in there. The above advice sounds spot on.

 

[gymjourneymom]

Would your boss be supportive of a L5/6 team meeting with you, boss and parents to set the record straight. Try to be able to show specific improvements made, required skills for their level, what skills they were missing or doing incorrectly when you took over and that you have worked hard to fix those / or teach them.

As a parent I would LOVE 1st place and 9's but hey, let's be realistic - not always going to happen all the time, for many reasons.

I wish you luck, you sound like a wonderful coach.

Some good advice here! I agree with gymmomntc2e6, Communication is the key!!! These uninformed parents have unrealistic expectations. They need to be informed of the situation your were dealt & that you are trying to do the right thing . Let them know that it's going to take time & a lot of hard work on everyones part, to turn this team around. Some times just having an open line of communicaton can solve some issues.

Also, I just wanted to say not all parents are like this bunch you're dealing with. Don't let this have a bad impression of parents in general & scare you away from open communication. Even in your group it's probably just a few squeaky wheels getting everyone else upset. Don't hold it against all of them. Some parents are quite embarassed by actions of others.

But I really think open & honest communication can help a lot. It's the not knowing/understanding what's going on that get rumors & gossip flowing between parents in the stands.

Good luck! I think you have the best interest of your team at heart...make sure the parents know it!

 

[Wally]

Always confront the situation head on assertively but also with the clear understanding that you are willing to listen to what their ideas/complaints are. Don't go into meetings being defensive... it sets up a confrontational situation. It would be best if your head coach chairs the meeting and you preplan some responses to the obvious issues that will be brought up. If your head coach isn't willing to support you in a meeting form, you will still need to cut the momentum of complainers off by communicating.

"Keep your friends close but your enemies closer!" is a great maxim here. Find out who the chief belly achers are and get them to be part of the solution of how to improve the situation. They then have to positively make things happen for the better with you or else they will be seen as part of the failure.

Remember they might ALL seem like Crazy Parents but it is more than likely that only a few noisy wheels are there and others nod along because that is what people do even if they don't agree.

What is happening now may have nothing to do with how you are coaching but more about your failure to let the parents know what you are trying to achieve. A news letter or start a habit of having a quick parent debrief after each fortnight of training to let them know what you are doing.

DON'T be defensive or reactive. You all have the same goals but just have to find the communication.

 

[CoachTodd]

Would your boss be supportive of a L5/6 team meeting with you, boss and parents to set the record straight. Try to be able to show specific improvements made, required skills for their level, what skills they were missing or doing incorrectly when you took over and that you have worked hard to fix those / or teach them....

Try to pick something specific to focus on with each event. i.e. Fixing tap swings on bars or front tubling or dance etc. Since L5/6 are compulsary levels, focus on the parts they would lose the most points on first and see if that helps calm the parents down.
On floor and beam, the dance skills are the most deductable skills. I'd focus on cleaning up their form on the leaps, jumps and toe turns as well as the specfic music timing on routines.
On bars, the tap swing is usually the easiest point saver to work on. i.e. Don't arch above low bar in the back, tap all the way to above high bar in the front. The 2 tap swings in the level 5 routine could cost more that 1.5 points if done incorrectly.
Vault is vault. It seem our judges here keep finding more and more deductions in compusory vaults even when they are done correctly.

Good luck

 

[Deleted member D3987]

come on everyone...compulsory. not compulsAry. thanks.