Daughter wants more gymnastics--what would you do?

[mommyof1]

Edit: Since the consensus of the replies is that I am way too concerned, I am deleting the whole long venting part. Short version: My 5-year-old loves gymnastics and is frustrated that she doesn't get to do enough in her rec class. I am frustrated that the rec class is not rigorous enough and she seems to have no chance of being moved into a developmental program.

Here are the options I have come up with:

1. Observe classes at another gym and then look into getting her evaluated there, even though it would be difficult and maybe impossible to get her to class/practice there.
2. Sign her up for an extra rec class to see if that makes any difference, and look into moving at the end of the summer if it doesn't.
3. Have a serious conversation with the rec coach and explicitly spell out my concerns, even though she has already made it pretty clear that she thinks my daughter should stay in the rec program.
4. Set up a meeting with someone higher up to ask about the requirements for pre-team and request an evaluation, with the substantial risk of appearing to be overly pushy.
5. Suck it up and accept that I am just nuts, and keep taking her to the rec class until she either gets moved up or gets so frustrated with her lack of progress that she wants to quit.

Other parents, what would you do? Are there timetables that I need to be thinking about (e.g., new developmental groups tend to be formed at the beginning of the summer or the beginning of the school year)? Or am I just too worried about it at this early stage of the game?

 

[Geoffrey Taucer]

She's 5. Don't worry about it.

 

[bookworm]

She's 5. Don't worry about it.

Ditto......

 

[wallinbl]

If she wants to do it more than she gets to, try doing class two nights a week instead of one, or go to open gym.

 

[MaryA]

I would say try for #2. Signing her up for a second rec class will give her the extra time in the gym that she is looking for, help her reach her goals more quickly, and show the coaches that she's serious about gymnastics. It is true that some gyms/coaches are looking for a specific "type" to invite to pre-team, but personally I don't think that "type" should be anything more than kids who are willing to work hard and able to listen and follow directions, so if your daughter continues to be excited about gymnastics, and you continue to feel like her current gym doesn't think of her as "team" material, I think it's perfectly reasonable to take her to be evaluated somewhere else.

Personally, when my daughter was 5 I figured, "She's 5. Don't worry about it." In retrospect, if I had known this was going to become her great passion in life, I would have done some looking around into other programs rather than just following blithely along on the path of the gym down the street. I know my daughter wishes I had done that too. Just saying...

 

[AlwaysCuriousMom]

Personally, I would sign her up for more rec classes. Maybe twice, or even three times a week for a high-energy, super-motivated child. For children who are driven, one hour a week, or even two seems really ZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzz.... especially when the child will end up signing up for something else (like soccer, or dance) just to fill the other hours of the week. Depends what you think your child can handle. I have one child like this. The others are not. Depends.... go with your gut.

 

[Deleted member D3987]

She's 5. Don't worry about it.

^^^^^^^^

 

[justanothergymmom]

Edit: Since the consensus of the replies is that I am way too concerned, I am deleting the whole long venting part. Short version: My 5-year-old loves gymnastics and is frustrated that she doesn't get to do enough in her rec class. I am frustrated that the rec class is not rigorous enough and she seems to have no chance of being moved into a developmental program.

Here are the options I have come up with:

1. Observe classes at another gym and then look into getting her evaluated there, even though it would be difficult and maybe impossible to get her to class/practice there.
2. Sign her up for an extra rec class to see if that makes any difference, and look into moving at the end of the summer if it doesn't.
3. Have a serious conversation with the rec coach and explicitly spell out my concerns, even though she has already made it pretty clear that she thinks my daughter should stay in the rec program.
4. Set up a meeting with someone higher up to ask about the requirements for pre-team and request an evaluation, with the substantial risk of appearing to be overly pushy.
5. Suck it up and accept that I am just nuts, and keep taking her to the rec class until she either gets moved up or gets so frustrated with her lack of progress that she wants to quit.

Other parents, what would you do? Are there timetables that I need to be thinking about (e.g., new developmental groups tend to be formed at the beginning of the summer or the beginning of the school year)? Or am I just too worried about it at this early stage of the game?

A very wise gymnastics coach once told me that at the age of 5 it is always better to leave them wanting more at the end of class than to drill them so hard that they can't wait to leave. At 5 it should be all about having fun. In your original post (unedited) I think you said something about her being frustrated that she didn't get to climb the rope every class? I bet that leaves her looking forward to the next class where she may have the opportunity to do it!

IMHO, I think sometimes parents have a difficult time accepting that not everything in gymnastics is about more training/conditioning/hours in the gym. For some kids, strenghth, flexibility and skills can just take more TIME to develop. Sure you can force a very young kid to develop strength and flexibility more quickly by adding in more gym time/repetitions/strength training. Or you can be patient and a wait a little while for things to develop more naturally. The patience will serve her far better at the upper levels of this sport than being able to do 250 consecutive straddle presses by the time she is 6 years and 3 months old... lol!

When my girls were younger, in order to get onto preteam, the coaches watched to see what their maturity level was, how good they were at listening and following directions, staying on task when the coach wasn't right on top of them, and waiting to take turns...these skills were equally important to how they were progressing skill-wise. I have also seen these very issues hold kids off of preteam that had all the skills they needed.

Has your daughter expressed to you that she is "frustrated with her lack of progress"?

 

[Geoffrey Taucer]

A very wise gymnastics coach once told me that at the age of 5 it is always better to leave them wanting more at the end of class than to drill them so hard that they can't wait to leave.

Not just 5 -- I'd say this applies at any age. The ideal amount of time for a kid to spend in the gym each week should be a little bit below what they would WANT to spend in the gym each week, so they always want more.

 

[justanothergymmom]

Not just 5 -- I'd say this applies at any age. The ideal amount of time for a kid to spend in the gym each week should be a little bit below what they would WANT to spend in the gym each week, so they always want more.

I think that the coach I mentioned would agree with you--that it applies to any age--she just happened to tell me this when my own DD was 5 and very eager for more gym time--hence the mention of that particular age.

 

[mommyof1]

A very wise gymnastics coach once told me that at the age of 5 it is always better to leave them wanting more at the end of class than to drill them so hard that they can't wait to leave. At 5 it should be all about having fun. In your original post (unedited) I think you said something about her being frustrated that she didn't get to climb the rope every class? I bet that leaves her looking forward to the next class where she may have the opportunity to do it!

...

Has your daughter expressed to you that she is "frustrated with her lack of progress"?

Here is one example of what she is expressing. At some random time during the week, she pipes up with "At gymnastics, I want to climb the rope all the way up to the top and ring the bell! I am going to practice and practice every week until I can do it." After gymnastics class: "I really wanted to climb the rope. Why didn't we climb the rope? I wanted to practice climbing the rope so I can climb it all the way to the top." It does leave her wanting more, but she is also old enough to understand that she is not going to reach the goal she has set for herself if she doesn't get a chance to work towards it. It is especially hard for her since her class doesn't follow a set lesson plan or schedule and she can't predict when she will next get to work on a particular skill or event. I totally agree that at age 5 it should be all about having fun, but for her a big component of "fun" is tackling challenges and mastering new skills. She must have inherited my Type A personality.

... When my girls were younger, in order to get onto preteam, the coaches watched to see what their maturity level was, how good they were at listening and following directions, staying on task when the coach wasn't right on top of them, and waiting to take turns...these skills were equally important to how they were progressing skill-wise. I have also seen these very issues hold kids off of preteam that had all the skills they needed. "

I get this, but in this case it appears to be skills or "talent" and not maturity that is keeping her in the rec class, even though there is a developmental program that starts at the beginner levels. Aside from a period of a couple weeks this winter when one of her friends from kindergarten joined the class and they were distracting each other, the coach has always been pleased with my daughter's focus.

I do think we are going to go the route of adding a second class, especially since her other activities are wrapping up for the year within the next month or two. She is also going to a real day camp for the first time this summer, and we are hoping that the swimming and other activities will help build her strength which will translate into more progress in the gym.

 

[gymnastmom38]

Are there open gym times that your gym offers? That's also a great way for her to work on some skills that she doesn't get to during class that she'd like to.

 

[emorymom]

Some gyms just do not want motivated kids in their development stream / on their teams if the child does not fit their talent / physical profile. Other gyms will take all workers.

Ropes are not cheap, but we got one at a garage sale and boy was it a favorite toy at our old house. If I had a tree to tie one on here at this house, I'd order one in a second. Another neighbor had one crazy tall in his yard (teenage ranger type).

 

[MaryA]

Ropes are not cheap, but we got one at a garage sale and boy was it a favorite toy at our old house. If I had a tree to tie one on here at this house, I'd order one in a second. Another neighbor had one crazy tall in his yard (teenage ranger type).

Eek! What do you put under it?

 

[gymmomtotwo]

Okay, I'll go against the grain a little here and say that you would not be crazy to look for another gym with a more open developmental program. I left a gym where only hand picked kids ever got to even try for team, much less have the opportunity for "real" coaching. (Ie attention to form, shapes, developing flexibility) They would just let kids kind of wander across the beam, and do skills without any attention to detail. They did about 2 minute of "stretching" before launching into circuits where the kids could just kind of bebop through the stations.

Moved to another gyms preschool classes. They had all the kids on a beam teaching them proper walks and went from there. In the spring, they had open tryout. She was picked for the first level of preteam for 4-6 year olds. The skill level going in was not high with the kids. Mostly they just all really love gymnastics. Well the first year is over, and you should see all of them. All are being moved to the next level of preteam. There is probably only one kid at the beginning of the year that would have had a chance at being asked to the preteam at the other gym. The rest would have been relegated to rec classes for eternity. They take kids really young and commit to developing them. And you know what, every level at our current gym beat the old gym at states. We love the new gym so much better and my 5 year old DD has a chance she would never have gotten at the other gym.
.
So, I would shop elsewhere if it is what she wants, and you are willing to commit extra time and money. Just my opinion. I'm not a coach, just a mom. But looking for another program worked for me (and my 8 year old who would never have made the team at the old gym and is now having a ball competing level 4)

 

[sally]

When my dd was 5 she was in the same boat. I went and looked at another gym just for an extra class as her gym you weren't allowed to do a extra day. But when we got there they said that she needs to go into a developmental class. Wow it was great they were learning a lot more then her kindy gym class and she loved it. Now she is a 8 year old birthday last week. She does 14hrs a week and is still the same she wants more. But instead of giving her more gymnastics I have put her in Ballet classes. I figure this will help with the gym, but will also give her something else. It has worked great for us. She loves her ballet and she is very good at it thanks to gym, but it has helped her in the jumps and leaps, so win win I think.

 

[mommyof1]

Okay, I'll go against the grain a little here and say that you would not be crazy to look for another gym with a more open developmental program. I left a gym where only hand picked kids ever got to even try for team, much less have the opportunity for "real" coaching. (Ie attention to form, shapes, developing flexibility) They would just let kids kind of wander across the beam, and do skills without any attention to detail. They did about 2 minute of "stretching" before launching into circuits where the kids could just kind of bebop through the stations.

This sounds a lot like our current situation. What worries me the most, and the biggest reason I want to get my daughter out of the rec program and onto the developmental track, is that every single kid in her class is still struggling with handstands and cartwheels--even those who are repeating the class for a second year. Even the girls in the more advanced rec class can barely hold a handstand or do a pullover. If it were just my daughter struggling with the basics, I would be more inclined to believe that we just need to wait it out and give her time to develop at her own pace. But it really looks more like they just aren't being taught enough. Maybe it is time to look for a new gym.

 

[sportsmom22]

When my oldest started gym, I had NO idea about team, preteam, developmental programs, etc. I just had a little girls who loved flipping. She was naturally strong, and she was a super hard worker. She started gym just a month or two before she turned 5. We had been in gym for about 3 months when we went in for a make up class with another coach. She stopped me after class and asked why my dd was not in the invitational class. I had no idea one existed. I told her that we had not been in gymnastics that long. It was close to summer and schedules were changing. My dd went into an advanced kindergarten class (that I now know was the preteam class). Again, I still really didn't know about how the kids advanced through the levels. My dd just loved the gym. I talked to her coach about adding another class and she suggested private lessons. We had the whole gym to ourselves and dd loved them. We didn't do privates every week, but we did them a lot. At the end of the semester, she was asked to be on the level 4 team. It's been a fun ride. Oldest dd quit gym at level 5 (when she was 8) to move onto competitive softball. Youngest dd is now working hard on kip to (hopefully) be moved up to level 5. I say follow your heart, she's your little girl. Too much gym, not enough gym--only the two of you can decide. I had NO idea when my oldest started that my girls would love it as much as they did. Oldest didn't stick with it, but I think her years in the gym prepared her for other sports. She is one of the strongest and one of the most hard working kids that I know. The only advice that I can give is--it's her sport, let her enjoy it.

 

[GymBee97]

She is only 5. If you want a gym with more riggor to the rec classes then go ahead and look and get a different opinion. Your other option might be to go a head and do another rec class maybe with a different coach. different coach may have a different opinion. I think your last option is to accept the evaluation of your current gym and know that not every kid no matter how much their parents or the child may want it are team material.

 

[monkeysmom]

what?

In no way shape or form should you accept a gym's evaluation of a 5 year old that they will not ever be "team material." That is a bunch of huey from people who have had too much kool aid, don't believe it. If you daughter loves the sport, just let her keep loving it. Don't accept the evaulation of one rec coach, who may be a high school student. Talk (nicely) to the teachers of the developmental program, perhaps they would let her do a two week trial period. If they still say no, try a second rec class for a while. If it were me, I'd wait a year or so before doing all that extra driving. Understand that the "no" may have nothing to do with your daughter and everything to do with the fact that number of spots are limited and they may have already "picked" who they want based on any number of factors some of which have a little validity and some of which may not. And reality is that if she can't do the splits and some pullups and toe ups, she'll need to work on those at home when she is six or seven to get onto a team program.

Are short girls really better at gymnastics through level 10, or do gyms make it so incredibly difficult for taller girls to get into the team system, that statistically the system warps toward the smaller girls and there is no real scientific validity to it? Is it true partly just because the system makes it be true?

My niece is one of the top hockey players in our state in her age group at her position, and just won a skills contest among the top players in the state. She has her sights on playing college hockey in a top program, and probably has a legitimate shot at it. I think back to when I took her to hockey a few times when she was five years old. Seems like yesterday. There were falls, tears, and potty emergencies. It makes me laugh to think anyone would have lined up those little girls and "decided" who had potential to be good someday and not given anyone else the opportunity to get some good training or competitive experience. It would have been utterly impossible to spot the ones who have emerged over the years as top players. Yes, I know I know gymnastics is the hardest sport...... and yes it is hard. But has the system over the years missed and discouraged many talented athletes who indeed were "team material" by funneling the kids too early into separate tracks?