Coaches Funny/embarrassing things your gymnasts have told you?

[MaddieLynn]

This was inspired by the thread in the parent's forum on embarrassing things kids do in public. As I can't post over there, but I've heard PLENTY of stuff from the kids I coach, I though I'd start one here! I've coached predominantly preschoolers but have also worked with level 1-3 kids (T&T) so they're mostly younger, and we all know how kids will say anything at that age...

Some that I, or my fellow coaches, have heard include:

"I'm in foster care right now till my mom and dad learn how to 'work it out'."

"My mom is going to have a baby!" (No... she wasn't.)

"My daddy brought me today because my mommy threw up."

I know there have got to be more, but that's all that comes to mind at the moment... so, what are some that y'all have heard?

 

[CreateMagic]

I had a little preschooler once who informed me she was hot (it was summer and there was no air conditioning). Seeing as though she was in a leotard, there wasn't much I could do, sorry kid. Well she showed me...and when I turned back around from helping a student, she was naked.....

 

[raenndrops]

From a just turned 4 yr old (who was a wealth of these things): "I didnt getta come to 'nastics cuz mommy's poopy medicine didnt work fast enough." (with the mortified mother sitting 10 feet away).
3 weeks later: "The doctor said mommy gotsta use my swimming floatie to sit on the bench cuz she gots nematodes."

And one I overheard from my younger gymmie, when she was 6... "I betcha a dollar that I can pick you up." said to EVERY single girl on the team... then she would proceed to pick them up.

 

[BlairBob]

I follow Jason Mortimer's posts sometimes and he posts some of the really good ones from his girls.

Jason Mortimer being JAO, the guy who made the "When will my Suzie kip" video

Here are some:

Megan (8): "I do art. I design clothes for my cat. I have a scar from when I tried to put a jacket on her."

Me: "Anna, bend your elbows when you run. You're not the T1000 trying to kill John Connor."
Anna (6): "You know I have no idea what you're talking about."

Me: "Haley, I'm going to be worried when you become a teenager."
Megan (8): "Jason, I'm going to be worried when you become an adult."

Me: "Stop bending your knees. There are some cardinal sins we just don't commit."
Simultaneously:
Abby (8): "There should be gymnastics sins."
Allysa (8): "Jason stop using fancy words."
Megan (8): "A cardinal is a bird."

Lexi (4): "A baby kangaroo is called a joey."
Me: "But what if its name is Tom? Do you still call it Joey?"
Lexi: "Yes. ...Well, I think so."

"Jason, there's no reason to push girls anymore in this day and age. It's 2011." -Megan, 8.

McKenzie (6): "I like when the mats get sweaty. I can draw with my elbows. I like my sweaty elbow drawings."

Me: "Go to dance. Learn to move like water. Or deer."
Alyssa (8): "Deer?"
Me: "Yes. Deer move very pretty."
Alyssa: "Not when they get shot."

"But he has his cartwheel. He has his pike stretch all the way down." -Lauren, 7 years old, responding to my comment that she is too good for her "boyfriend" and deserves better.

"*sigh.* Jason, what am I going to do with you?" -Abby, 7 years old.

"Thanks for giving me a valentine Abby." "Yeah, we had extra."

"I've been practicing saluting my cat." -the 7 year old who forgot to salute the judge 3 times last meet.

 

[catou]

Wow, the last post is so funny!

• I had a 3 year old gymnast telling me she had brought her gymnastics juice (powerade)
• One asked another gymnast how many teeth her boyfriend had lost
• One asked me what was the superbowl last week-end
• I forgot my straight legs in Cuba during christmas break
• Me: keep your arms straight in your lunge... it looks like moose antlers

Just because I like kids quotes, here are some I heard in my other job:

• I threw it in the net hole! I made a point! (The net hole was a basket ball hoop)
• Yesterday I cried. Me: Why? I miss Santa Claus
• Tell me a pirate accessory starting with the letter P. I had the following answer: Peduncle!
• It's an hippotamus? (It was only the sound of someone snoring...)

 

[flipflopsalto]

How about this one when I was very pregnant still coaching

12 year old "What if your baby just falls out"
me "my baby is not going to fall out"
9 year old "Wait I don't get it how could it fall out if they come out of your stomach"
of course 9 year old keeps insisting "but I don"t get it"
12 year old is laughing
me"go ask your mom"
ugh