WAG Gymnasts who always doubt themselves...

[munchkin3]

Sorry eucoach, that is always upsetting.

 

[eucoach]

Thanks for the answers everyone!

It's a real pity because this girl would have been doing much better in optional gymnastics than in compulsory. We have a system that takes compulsory to a higher level (mix of US L7-L9 skills) and she is definitely not the kind of gymnast to do well in that. So I was really looking forward to get her to optional routines (starting this fall).
She might move to another program (probably a little like Xcel) - I'm not sure she will feel less pressure though as at this point she does not really know why she feels pressure. Also, this other program is quite restrictive as well - giving the girls the option to perform up to 10 skills on each event that have to come from a list of....10!!! skills.

Having a gymnast quit is never fun....it's even less fun when it's not for one of the common and obvious reasons - lack of work ethic, problem with schoolwork, lack of motivation, injury.

 

[munchkin3]

Don't take it personally. The kids' gotta want it.....the parents wanting it isn't enough.

When my son quit, at 14, he spent 6 months in 'self sabotaging' behavior, but he was not doubting himself, he just didn't FEEL like doing the Tsuk, or working on pommel circles......then he had tons of psychosomatic pains which he crafted so he could avoid certain skills. His wrist always hurt for high bar. But he wasn't doing all this because he was a lier, or being manipulative and he certainly didn't realize he was doing it......his pains were very real.......he was 14 and could not imagine life without gymnastics since he had been doing it since he was 6! But he hadn't figured out that he didn't want to DO gymnastics....when he realized, he retired......
I still think he will regret it later, but I can't MAKE him do it.....HE has to want to do it.......
For the adults, it's very hard because we can see things the kid can't, but that's the kicker! Is young lady needs to figure it out on her own.

 

[eucoach]

oh, I don't take it personally at all, don't worry.

I've had a gymnast like your son, the girl who just quit is not like that at all. In your son's (and my former gymnast's) case it's probably good to let/make them quit rather sooner than later.

It is hard with kids, yes - I hope mine will be super easy. LOL.

I talked to another coach who is a mom and has been through it all. What she said is that she feels giving kids all these options at such a young age is probably not the best thing to do because they cannot possibly make such complex decisions, especially if they are unsure about something. What she did with her kids (who were all gymnasts) was that she told them if they did not want to do it anymore, they could take 2 weeks between each semester (so basically twice a year) and decide whether they wanted to continue or not. Until then they had to stick with it. I actually think this is a fairly reasonable idea - being allowed to quit whenever they want (and therefore being able to think about it all the time) sounds like a horrible thing to me.