Coaches How to move on graciously

[flipflopsalto]

Hello,

I am a coach of team and a mother of a child on team. We are done with the gym we are at for a LOT of reasons, but I am having a hard time coming up with a way to let them know we are leaving. We are not leaving because I think there is a bigger better gym around the corner I know that each place has its own problems and I am not planning to coach somewhere else actually I am planning to give up coaching for now. The problem is I do not want any animosity and I know they are the type to hold grudges. I don't want my child to say hello to them in the future and have an adult turn their back to her. I am thinking that there is no way around it and its a lesson she will have to learn. Any suggestions?

 

[iwannacoach]

Share your reasoning with them and tell them it's what you feel and you have no need to make others feel the same as you..... including them. Each of us should be entitled to our opinions, but should also keep in mind that others are entitled to theirs.

Some people hesitate to share opinions based on experiences when they're worried the opinion will be carry a message of judgement or accusation when neither are intended. Make your wish leave under god terms known and that your choice to leave is based upon what makes you tick, far more than how they tick. If they want to know what they may have contributed to your decision, telling them the truth has little to do with right or wrong, as often these decisions are based on personal dynamics that many people are loathe to change.

Comfort yourself by knowing that your decisions and actions are right for you, and they should understand that and treat it as an amicable parting. If they don't then it won't matter how you leave, and you can chalk it up to nothing venture is nothing gained.

 

[flipflopsalto]

I know things will be better for us in the end, but it's so hard to leave. .

 

[txgymfan]

Clear out your child's locker and most of yours, then as a coach give them a two week notice in writing. In a separate communication tell them your child's last date at team practice will be XX ( the same as yours or now). Be prepared for them to say you are done immediately.

I would not explain unless they ask for your reasons. In case they do have a written statement or at least bullet points ready for the discussion if you choose to have it. You do not owe them any explanation for you or your dd. Simply you have decided to make the change. If they can be hostile then don't give them any fuel. Just like a gym routine, don't give them any reasons to give you ( or your dd) a "deduction". If you come up with reason why they will come up with more "why not".

Good luck to you and your dd I hope her next gym is her last.

 

[Deleted member 14190]

Its' all about the delivery, and that is up to you..

 

[flipflopsalto]

Thanks everyone.Gymnastics is such a small community that it makes things like this hard. I hope that our final gym choice is our forever gym whether it be for my daughter or both of us in the future.

 

[flipflopsalto]

The graciously part is getting closer to being thrown out the window. Why must things always get worse before they get better.

 

[LAnderson]

I totally understand. I left a gym 3 years ago and still get treated bad by them when I run into them, owner, manager and some of the coaches. People need to learn to be more professional and get over it!

 

[flipflopsalto]

Well it's been about 5 months now since we left and dd couldn't be happier. I, of course, miss coaching like crazy, but am thinking of other ways to get involved like possibly coaching a high school or middle school team. We haven't had many run ins with old team, but meet season is rapidly approaching, I plan to hold my head high and smile say hello and whatever they choose to do with that is their choice. Hopefully dd doesn't have to learn the life lesson that some people are just jerks yet but if she does, I'll take the time to talk with her about it. In the end this has been one of the harder, but best decisions I have ever made.