If you had to do it over again...would you change anything?

[taximom]

My daughter has been at the same gym for 8 years. She considers it her home and loves her coach and team mates as if they were family. She has learned to work hard and never give up. Skills in the gym don't come easily to her she has to work at them to get them. Her coach has the ability to be the type of coach she needs and meet the needs of each of her team mates.

There was a time when we contemplated moving gyms and incurring a longer commute and higher tuition but we decided to stay and we are glad we did. If we had moved perhaps she would have progressed faster but at what cost.

My daughter has a reputation for watching how coaches interact with their athletes at a meet. This past weekend she watched a girl she knows cry at each event because of the things her coach was saying to her. This is a girl who has never acted this way in the past. I have not spent thousands of dollars on gymnastics tuition and leotards to incur a therapy bill down the road. My daughter has coaches who see the big picture, gymnastics is one part of her life but it is the part that probably prepares her best for her future.

Overall I wouldn't change a thing but that doesn't mean I won't second guess myself every once in a while...

 

[LizzieLac]

What a great question, and something my DH and I have been talking about the last few weeks. If I had it to do over again, I would have had my daughter start at a gym that has a team, as opposed to the rec-only program where she started taking classes when she was in kindergarten.

I just has no idea how much she was going love it and that she was going to be decent at it. I truly thought that up until she was 8 when I finally moved her to her current gym, that if I had her involved in anything more competitive with gymnastics than rec classes then I was delusional. I didn't realize that kids compete at 6 years old. I thought she had all of the time in world, and didn't really think that being a competitive gymnast was what she was capable of. I guess I just thought that kids don't get serious with that so early unless you live in another country. I was very uninformed and I didn't want to be an over-the-top parent.

Now that DD is 10, I think she missed the boat so to speak. She got to this sport a little late. I suppose now that I see how much she loves it and that she is pretty good, I wonder if she should have focused on gym sooner and not competed swimming for 2 years. But, that reaction is wrong too, because she got so much out of swimming. It made her a better athlete and a better kid. She had fun with that as well, and made some great friends that she still hangs out with even though she is not on the team but they still are.

If you exchange something for something else, then you miss out on the experiences from the thing you replaced - positive and negative.

 

[cher062]

The only thing I would change now that I have 20/20 hindsite vision is I would have moved my DD to the gym we are at now 3 years ago when I first though about it. Other than that the only other thing would have been to have DS wear the more heavy duty knee brace to his last meet when he re-dislocated his knee. He would still be competing if he had. but I guess we are all where we are supposed to be at the time we are there. We may not like it sometimes but I believe there is a reason we are where we are at.

 

[henrik541]

I definitely wish I could have started earlier and maybe at a better gym... Well the second part wasn't my fault, but the first one was. I could have started, I just didn't. (Don't know why)

 

[CoachGoofy]

As a gymnast, I would have taken some injuries more seriously. Things that happened over a decade ago still hurt. And I was kind of a pain to coach, so even though I couldn't change the weird ways my brain/body processes instructions, I could theoretically have been less the frustrating frustrated kid. My coaches in my teenhood were the most patient women alive.

I wouldn't change a thing in terms of gyms, coaches, splitting my time between artistic & T&T. We weren't the "best" gym but we were the best for me.

 

[coachmolly]

I did gymnastics from 8-15, so of course there were a lot of red flags I should have seen that I didn't. Since day 1 I was obsessed with this incredible sport and my parents have always been totally clueless. They had no idea what to do with a kid who ate, slept, and breathed something totally foreign to them. They really did the best they could in helping me out, getting me to meets and practices, paying the bills, the list goes on. They supported me in every way they knew how, so much more than most kids could imagine, and while their lack of knowledge and initiative was somewhat frustrating at the time, I know they did the best they could and I am so grateful for all of that.
I could say that I wished I would have started a better program, but I'm not sure I would have even been able to make the team in that kind of setting as a late starter at 8. So I'm glad I was able to get that opportunity at gym #1. The biggest regret is staying at gym #1 as long as I did and then moving to gym #2 which was just as, if not even more, destructive. In their program I had no value, no talent, and was limited in what I did. My parents didn't know the options available at the time, and I didn't really either, so I stuck it out hoping my passion would be enough. I got out after 3 years, but too much damage had been done.
My mom has said she regrets not starting me at gym #3 from the start, but there are no guarantees I would have even made the team there, and I'm glad I got the opportunities I did to compete, attend camps, and just do what I loved to do early on. The injuries were severe in my case, as well as the mental issues, but I don't regret devoting so much time to gymnastics, even in the less than desirable circumstances.
I am, by nature, an intense person and think that was a large part of the problem as well as several other uncontrollable issues I dealt with. So because of those innate characteristics, things could have turned out the same if I went back and did everything the "right" way.
My goal from early on was college gymnastics, even at the lowest ranked school possible, and it hurt that that wasn't in the cards for me. But in reality, having seen my brothers experiences as a college athlete and living with athletes, there is a good chance I would not have fit in anyway. So there is no use getting worked up about something that might have caused additional stress.
I am so grateful that I was able to find something I am so passionate about so early in life, I have friends who still don't have that. I'm grateful for the less than adequate coaches who taught me what not to do and who gave me the perfect idea of who I want to be as a coach. And despite everything, I still love gymnastics just as much as I did when I was 8 years old , before the injuries, heartbreaks, mental struggles, and everything in between.

 

[gymgrl2597]

I would have started competing sooner, I first started competing when I was 11 and if I had started earlier I could have been a higher level

 

[Blackie6]

Great question!

I think most of us are in agreement that many of us had no idea gymnastics would extend past a simple rec class, LOL!

I probably would have changed only one thing and that would have been to stay at the original gym my DD started at. We started in rec at Gym #1 and then while she was still very young and in rec classes moved over to gym #2 (which was very close, less than a mile away!) because it was attached to the building my DD took dance class in. Now, I don't regret the friends I've made at gym #2 or when my DD went to the team her coach, they will always be a part of who my daughter is and we think of them often and fondly and still keep in touch! But, owner of gym #2 not good at running the gym, and every year the tuition and fees would keep going up while gyms in our area who are bigger (and better) and more competative, were asking for LESS $. It was either have DD quit or make a move quickly. We went back to gym #1 and I couldn't be happier. I guess maybe I wish we had just stayed there right from the start. Teamates that came over with us at the same time are just as happy. Gym #1 has good communication w/parents, proud of their teams and often post scores, pictures, plenty of fundraising opportunity, and gym owners can look me in the eye and say "hi" when they see me!

As far as training, I would not change a thing. I like DD taking her time thru the levels. We make sure she has other activities in her life, enjoys her team friends but also has non-team friends, and is allowed to pursue other interests and sometimes leave early or cut to play another sport, instrument or attend birthday party. IMHO you can't turn back time and I never want my DD to regret the daily schedule of gymnastics training year after year without me stepping in and keeping life fun for her. Yeah, she would skip a party to go to gym if I let her, but is one practice going to kill her olympic chance? Nope, she's not going and there is no fast track, it's the slow track til she says "done". As long as she is happy, smiling and enjoying it, I write the checks!

 

[bribri514]

For the longest time I had a lot of regrets about gym. In 8th grade I was competing level 10 and had an offer from a gym in our state to train for elite with them. In my 13 year old mind I thought that was the best thing ever. The problem was the gym is over 100 miles away through winding mountain roads. My mom said absolutely not. I begged and pleaded and asked if we could move or if I could go live with my aunt and uncle who lived in a big city closer, or even go board with another family. My mom said absolutely not.

From there I stayed at my club gym and tried high school gym (which was a big failure for me, like I've mentioned in the past, my coach was awful and thought I should be in the special olympics, and some of the older girls were very mean and catty). I quit for two years and started competing again senior year of high school trying to get on a college gym team. At the time I was mad for quitting thinking if I hadn't I could have made a really great NCAA team.

But now, in my sophomore year of college with some reoccuring injuries that have stopped my training for now I finally look back on gym and don't see as many regrets.

Sure it would have been awesome to try elite, but my mom was looking out for our family. My dad passed away when I was little in a car accident and my mom didn't want to separate our family for anything. I can see that now and really respect it. Our family is way more important than gymnastics. Also I could have gotten hurt or burnt out and then wouldn't have school. My mom made it clear school is very important (she is a public school teacher which probably explains it) and no way would she ever let me sacrifice my education for gym. She could never homeschool me being a single mom working two-three jobs depending on the season and wanted the best education for me. Like I said as a 13 year old I was incredibly mad about this but now I understand. I'm doing well at a hearing college, which not every Deaf person can say. I see now it's because of the decisions my mom made when I was younger.

As far as high school I wish I hadn't taken those two years off sometimes. But after my last injury I realized I couldn't have made it this far if I hadn't, I might have gotten hurt sooner. Also in that year and half-two years off I joined cheerleading. It helped boost my confidence even more and gave me exposure to new things. It's helped shaped me as a person.

So yeah, basically my point is for a long time I regretted a lot about my gymnastics career. It was a lot of would have- should have- could haves. I thought my mom wasn't willing to sacrifice things for my gymnastics. Now I realize that everything happened for a reason and I'm incredibly blessed to have a mom that looked out for my best interests like she did. And I got a lot of gymnastics that is positive too. Self discipline, determination, a good work ethic, lots of confidence, positive things about my balance and other issues effected by my Deafness, etc. etc. I've come to terms with it all (mostly!) and am really grateful for the way gymnastics has affected my life!

 

[MdGymMom01]

BriBri--I truly admire your courage, sincerety and wisdom! I love reading posts from gymnasts themselves because I feel that they give a very unique perspective and are insightful and real with their experiences. You are a very wise, thoughtful and understanding young lady Bri! For you to be able to look back and examine the path that your gymnastics took and to make the above interpretation is what the journey of gymnastics (and life) is all about.

You have so much to offer the gymnastics world and young people with your story and how you endured and perserveared--you are a true inspiration!! I hope you consider motivational speaking or become an author as a career choice because you are very gifted!! Thanks for sharing!!

 

[UnoMas]

yes, I would have never let either of my daughters START this crazy sport which sucks up all my money and my time.

I guess I'm not really serious about that. One thing I would change is, I would have let my oldest start earlier. She took dance from the age of 3-5 and tried one gymnastics session when she was 4 (I think it was like 3 months long). Anyway, she begged and begged me to stay with the gymnastics but I made her choose dance because it was cheaper. The thing was, she never LOVED dance. When we moved across the country, she continued to beg me to put her back in gymnastics on a daily basis. I finally got her back in when she was 6...and since that day she has never wanted to miss a day of class and now practice. She eats, breathes, sleeps, LIVES for gymnastics. So, I guess I wish I had let her stick with it when she was 4. She is 9 now (almost 10) and a level 5 and I always wonder where she would be now if she'd started competing at 6 like my younger daughter is doing.

Anyway...that's what I'd change, I guess. Along with never letting them start.