Parents Mental block on bars - Level 6

[gymnasticsmom]

My daughter is level 6 and recently had some kind of incident on bars where she was practicing her giants to flyaways. Now she is scared to do her flyaway dismount in her routine. Last meet her coach had her scratch on bars. I'm trying to figure out the best course of action for the next meet. Should she just keep scratching until she gets the dismount back or should she do a different dismount and get a lower score? She has already stated she doesn't want to do the latter b/c she would be embarrassed by the low score. On the other hand, I'm not convinced she shouldn't compete on bars for the rest of the season (which is only 2 meets). Thoughts on this?

Also, any tips on how I can support her during this mental block? I'm not sure what the coaches are even saying to her right now and my daughter is also not the most communicative person. I know she's concerned and frustrated, but I'm not sure how to help her with this. Her coaches advice to me was to just not talk about this with her as it could feed the pressure she feels. Anyone else gone through this?

 

[Stranger.maci]

My DD, 12 year old level 6/7 just went through this. She had no fall or anything that caused the mental block though it came out of nowhere. Although she definitely had a fear of giants ahead of this (although she would do them). Her coach was luckily very patient and took her back to basics. This all started in November and at first he literally just had her do tap swings! She did have a meet very shortly after this started and she did a very watered down routine that scored a 7.0. Her gym is not super competitive, very small, and does not typically scratch. The good news is by January she was doing small cast to flyaway again and by Feb could do giant (although with bent legs) to flyaway again. I know this is hard on the gymmie and the parents. I posted about this when it happened to my DD!

What I did is not talk about it at all. She actually didn't bring it up either. I was and am so grateful for the patience and support of her coach. I firmly believe if pressured she would still be having this block. If your girl brings it up to you just give hugs and encouragement. This too shall pass! I really hope she can move on from this block quickly!

 

[gymgal]

If you know your coaches and trust them then I wouldn't get involved other than perhaps ask if a few privates would be helpful. As for your dd, just support her if she wants to talk about it but don't dwell on it. She clearly would rather scratch and if the coaches are OK with that, that's the plan. My most used line with dd was always - you will get it (back) when you mind and body are ready - you just need to trust the process.

 

[Coach Kate]

I had a mental block or two as an athlete, and a focused private did wonders for me. Ask if your child's coach would be open to that.

 

[rlm's mom]

I know everyone on here says not to talk to your kiddo about mental blocks but for some kids the best thing is to talk about it! DD8 had a block on her beam series a few months ago. She would constantly poke fun at herself for her series and it became the joke of the house. I sat down with her one evening and we talked through all the motions of her series, as which points she balked etc and discussed what she should say to herself when on the beam - and she was fine since!! Every kid is different. If your kids doesn't want to talk about that skill, leave it that way, but some kids do better when they talk things through.

 

[gymgal]

I know everyone on here says not to talk to your kiddo about mental blocks but for some kids the best thing is to talk about it! DD8 had a block on her beam series a few months ago. She would constantly poke fun at herself for her series and it became the joke of the house. I sat down with her one evening and we talked through all the motions of her series, as which points she balked etc and discussed what she should say to herself when on the beam - and she was fine since!! Every kid is different. If your kids doesn't want to talk about that skill, leave it that way, but some kids do better when they talk things through.

good perspective. I think the most important thing to remember is to listen to your child if they want to talk and are asking for help ( which your child was indirectly doing) and back away if they are not.

 

[gymnasticsmom]

My DD, 12 year old level 6/7 just went through this. She had no fall or anything that caused the mental block though it came out of nowhere. Although she definitely had a fear of giants ahead of this (although she would do them). Her coach was luckily very patient and took her back to basics. This all started in November and at first he literally just had her do tap swings! She did have a meet very shortly after this started and she did a very watered down routine that scored a 7.0. Her gym is not super competitive, very small, and does not typically scratch. The good news is by January she was doing small cast to flyaway again and by Feb could do giant (although with bent legs) to flyaway again. I know this is hard on the gymmie and the parents. I posted about this when it happened to my DD!

What I did is not talk about it at all. She actually didn't bring it up either. I was and am so grateful for the patience and support of her coach. I firmly believe if pressured she would still be having this block. If your girl brings it up to you just give hugs and encouragement. This too shall pass! I really hope she can move on from this block quickly!

Thank you so much - her coaches also recommended I not talk about it at all. Which I haven't! I also did get her a private this week so she could get some one-on-one time.

 

[gymnasticsmom]

If you know your coaches and trust them then I wouldn't get involved other than perhaps ask if a few privates would be helpful. As for your dd, just support her if she wants to talk about it but don't dwell on it. She clearly would rather scratch and if the coaches are OK with that, that's the plan. My most used line with dd was always - you will get it (back) when you mind and body are ready - you just need to trust the process.

Awesome advice, thank you so much!

 

[gymnasticsmom]

I had a mental block or two as an athlete, and a focused private did wonders for me. Ask if your child's coach would be open to that.

Definitely - I have asked for a private and she's getting one this weekend. Thank you so much!

 

[gymnasticsmom]

good perspective. I think the most important thing to remember is to listen to your child if they want to talk and are asking for help ( which your child was indirectly doing) and back away if they are not.

Agreed - great perspective. My daughter tends to not want to talk about anything and the more I push her, the more she clams up. So in my case, I probably shouldn't push her to talk about it. My other daughter, on the other hand, tells me every thought that comes into her head, so if she were a gymnast, we'd probably talk about! Like you said - every kid is different!

 

[Stranger.maci]

Thank you so much - her coaches also recommended I not talk about it at all. Which I haven't! I also did get her a private this week so she could get some one-on-one time.

Really hope the private goes well and helps!

 

[Deleted member 18037]

Let her lead on wanting to talk or not. My kid would not want to talk at all.

Assure her this is normal. It’s a mental injury and it will heal. And not everyone heals on the same timeline. Focus on what’s going well.

Regarding what she does at a meet. That’s the coaches and possibly her decision. And varies by gym and gymmie