Parents Negative talking at the gym

[Kiwi]

Think about it from the gym owner's perspective. If there is negative talk in the lobby, how does that reflect on his/her business? If some of the talk is not true, how does that reflect? It may well end up costing him/her money due to families leaving the gym.

Yes, that was why the gym manager got so upset. Apparently we were scaring off the customers. However, all of us have been loyal customers of our gym for years and years. We felt quite hurt too. We like our gym, we weren't dissing the gym. If this eavesdropping person was so bothered by what she was hearing, she could have asked us and we could have clarified. We have plenty of positive things to say about our gym. We don't know who it was, but it wasn't one of the 'regulars'. She didn't name names (she didn't even know us) but apparently emailed our whole conversation or what she'd heard of it, anyway, which is what made us feel really spied on. Things did settle down again afterwards, but the whole drama was unnecessary and could have been avoided.

I guess it is different if these are people you know well and you are involved in the situation and know what is going on. I still would not tattle, even in a general way with no names. People have a right to converse and give their thoughts and opinions. Probably I would just try to avoid people I felt were very negative, and learn to tune out other people's conversations in the waiting area. A general letter to all parents might work if it was put in a positive way. Banning all negative talk is kind of hypocritical, like the old saying 'floggings will continue until morale improves'.

 

[cbifoja]

When I read threads like these, I am so thankful to be at our gym. It is small so everyone not only knows everyone else, we know their spouses, the gymmies' siblings, pets, schools, favorite subjects, and other activities! LOL So yeah, we're all up in everyone's business.

With that, out of our team of 50 from L3 to L7, we have ONE parent who I would characterize as a Negative Nellie. But even with that the things she complains about are her own doing. She's a gym hopper and complains about how many coaches her kid has had in her years. Umm....duh? The funny thing is that everyone knows that's just how Nellie is. She is rarely in the lobby so she isn't scaring away rec parents and all of the team parents long ago learned just to tut-tut and change the subject.

The only time I've ever approached our coach with negative information was when a disgruntled parent posted horrible things about the gym on that Topix forum. Another parent had told me about it and I mentioned it to gym owner. She told the parents her side of the issue and said we were free to believe what we wanted but this was how she felt.

She did tell me how hurt she was by whole thing given how out of the way she had gone for the child but that she couldn't please everyone and run a viable business. I believed her and supported her and that was the end of it.

 

[Moxiegrl83]

Our team members and parents have to sign a contract that among other things, says no trash talking in the lobby. If you have a problem, you can email, text, or call her any time, so it's never been an issue. I can see how feeling like you can't talk to your child's coach can lead to that sort of talk in the lobby. Also, sometimes just having another parent validate your feelings on the issue can solve it, but most of our team parents are friends, so they talk without causing all the drama in front of other parents.

I think it would depend on what they were saying if I would go "tattle". If it's a quiet conversation, I'd leave it alone. If they are complaining to all the parents in the group, and trying to get everyone riled up about stuff, and it's happening frequently, I'd mention it to someone at the gym. It would make me uncomfortable to have to sit there and listen to it.