WAG Ok, who LIKES their coach??

[shelovestoflip]

As we come to the end of our club gymnastics journey, I look back and see how incredibly important the coaches have been. "Like" is not necessarily a word that matters to me about dd's coaches; I respect them and more importantly, I trust them. If I were to tally up the time spent with coaches versus the time spent with mom and dad, I think I would find that the number for coaches is higher. This means that those coaches play a really significant role in the upbringing of an athlete. "Like" comes and goes almost with the phase of the moon; respect and trust, once earned, are there for the long-haul. Focus on getting to the respect and trust point, rather than the fleeting "like" point.

Agree 100%! I do like my daughter's coaches but when I read the title of this thread, I thought, if I/my daughter didn't like them, we would have left a long time ago. But as MeetDirector says, respect and trust are super important. My daughter is a 16 year old and Level 9. She's been doing this forever. She spends more time with the coaches than with me during the week. I have to know they care about her and would do anything to support her! I think about bars….they will literally catch your daughter if she falls! There needs to be trust and respect! I think then 'like' will come naturally. That being said, there are certainly times where I know my daughter gets frustrated with her coaches. But because the trust is there, she knows that at the end of the day, it will all work out.

 

[emilykatherine]

Sorry that coach has issues.

Why would you say that? I go to my coach for anything even stuff not gym related, it's a good thing. I'm glad that coach is trying to do so too.

 

[Deleted member 18037]

Why would you say that? I go to my coach for anything even stuff not gym related, it's a good thing. I'm glad that coach is trying to do so too.

Again it has nothing to do with what a gymnast will go to a coach with.

However if an adult coach needs that much affirmation from someone they are coaching it is an issue.

I will not comment on this further.

To each his own. I expect my daughter coach to do just that coach. I expect my girl to respect them. If her coaches require more then that I think hmmm what is up with them. Really if they need so much validation to be expected to be a confidant, again they "expect to be" that sends up a bunch of red flags for me.

You are entitled to your opinions.

 

[Deleted member 18037]

To the coaches here,

Do you all need to be the confidant, the savior of your gymmies? They have boy problems, do you need to hear it?They are ticked off because their parents have rules they don't care for are you going to rush in and save the day? Some girl at lunch picked on them, is that a big concern of yours if it doesn't affect gym?

Or do you just want them to give their best at gym?

 

[Aero]

@Deleted member 18037 | I agree with you that a coach who needs to have children confide in them is an issue. However, it is mainly an issue for the coach, not the child or parent. Nobody should need validation from others to be happy and successful with their lives. And that's for anything in life, not just coaching/teaching. Validation of one's life should come from within, as well as taking pride in the things one does.

However, there is absolutely nothing wrong with a coach being open to their athletes and vice-versa, so long as they are not relying on it for self-validation. In fact, I consider it a very healthy aspect of the teacher/student relationship. I love hearing about my girls' days, things they do, have done, or will do, things they are excited about, what they've learned, where they went on vacation, funny stories that happened, etc. I am honored that my athletes feel connected enough with me to share these things. However, I do not ask this of them, and I certainly don't need this attention to feel better about myself. It is a way to connect with the people under your care, and it can do wonders for levels of trust and respect, because it shows you care about them as a person, rather than just a gymnast.

Obviously, one of my biggest goals as a coach is to have my girls do well at gymnastics, and it is precisely this reason that I believe in an open athlete/coach relationship. Boy problems, parent issues, and bullies at school can all be big contributing factors to poor performance in the gym. They cause stress and worry. Recently, one of my eight year old Silvers seemed a bit off at practice, like she was mentally preoccupied with something, so I told her to take a short drink break. As she was coming back I met her half way, got down on her level, and I asked her what was on her mind. She openly admitted that she was picked on at school that day by a girl she thought was her friend. I acknowledged that that must have been rough, but now she's at gymnastics and none of that matters now. I mentioned that this is her escape, and a place where she has fun and she has a chance to shine, not to mention that she is in the presence of all her friends. I then suggested she get back to the drills, she smiled, and bounced away to her station. She had a great rest of the practice, and it made my day.

Sometimes all it takes is to listen and show support. Nothing sketchy about that.

 

[xxStumpyxx]

@Deleted member 18037 |However, there is absolutely nothing wrong with a coach being open to their athletes and vice-versa, so long as they are not relying on it for self-validation. In fact, I consider it a very healthy aspect of the teacher/student relationship. I love hearing about my girls' days, things they do, have done, or will do, things they are excited about, what they've learned, where they went on vacation, funny stories that happened, etc. I am honored that my athletes feel connected enough with me to share these things. However, I do not ask this of them, and I certainly don't need this attention to feel better about myself. It is a way to connect with the people under your care, and it can do wonders for levels of trust and respect, because it shows you care about them as a person, rather than just a gymnast.

Obviously, one of my biggest goals as a coach is to have my girls do well at gymnastics, and it is precisely this reason that I believe in an open athlete/coach relationship. Boy problems, parent issues, and bullies at school can all be big contributing factors to poor performance in the gym. They cause stress and worry. Recently, one of my eight year old Silvers seemed a bit off at practice, like she was mentally preoccupied with something, so I told her to take a short drink break. As she was coming back I met her half way, got down on her level, and I asked her what was on her mind. She openly admitted that she was picked on at school that day by a girl she thought was her friend. I acknowledged that that must have been rough, but now she's at gymnastics and none of that matters now. I mentioned that this is her escape, and a place where she has fun and she has a chance to shine, not to mention that she is in the presence of all her friends. I then suggested she get back to the drills, she smiled, and bounced away to her station. She had a great rest of the practice, and it made my day.

Sometimes all it takes is to listen and show support. Nothing sketchy about that.

You have hit the nail on the head with this one, this is what the coach was trying to do, I don't think it is need thing in the coaches side at all. There is more to a gymnastics coach then to just train them in gymnastics, the coach needs to be a role model, a mentor, someone the girls/boys can open up to when the child needs to, someone to trust and be comfortable with. It is no good to have a coach that is just strict all the time and have no other interaction with then children except to give them orders. I feel a coach needs to have a balance between discipline and nicer side as the children will spent a lot of time with them. I think this also plays a part in keeping them in gymnastics, without a good friendly coach most gymnasts quit. My daughter has being training with this coach for 4 years, first in rec and then in development, so that say something about the way the coach wants to be is working.

 

[Mrs. Puma]

@Deleted member 18037 | I agree with you that a coach who needs to have children confide in them is an issue. However, it is mainly an issue for the coach, not the child or parent. Nobody should need validation from others to be happy and successful with their lives. And that's for anything in life, not just coaching/teaching. Validation of one's life should come from within, as well as taking pride in the things one does.

However, there is absolutely nothing wrong with a coach being open to their athletes and vice-versa, so long as they are not relying on it for self-validation. In fact, I consider it a very healthy aspect of the teacher/student relationship. I love hearing about my girls' days, things they do, have done, or will do, things they are excited about, what they've learned, where they went on vacation, funny stories that happened, etc. I am honored that my athletes feel connected enough with me to share these things. However, I do not ask this of them, and I certainly don't need this attention to feel better about myself. It is a way to connect with the people under your care, and it can do wonders for levels of trust and respect, because it shows you care about them as a person, rather than just a gymnast.

Obviously, one of my biggest goals as a coach is to have my girls do well at gymnastics, and it is precisely this reason that I believe in an open athlete/coach relationship. Boy problems, parent issues, and bullies at school can all be big contributing factors to poor performance in the gym. They cause stress and worry. Recently, one of my eight year old Silvers seemed a bit off at practice, like she was mentally preoccupied with something, so I told her to take a short drink break. As she was coming back I met her half way, got down on her level, and I asked her what was on her mind. She openly admitted that she was picked on at school that day by a girl she thought was her friend. I acknowledged that that must have been rough, but now she's at gymnastics and none of that matters now. I mentioned that this is her escape, and a place where she has fun and she has a chance to shine, not to mention that she is in the presence of all her friends. I then suggested she get back to the drills, she smiled, and bounced away to her station. She had a great rest of the practice, and it made my day.

Sometimes all it takes is to listen and show support. Nothing sketchy about that.

You sound like an amazing coach!

 

[SignHere]

Aero,
I hope your parents appreciate you! . You def sound like someone I'd like coaching my daughter!

 

[Mrs. Puma]

I feel very, very fortunate to have our coaches. They definitely care about my child as a person. I may have some concerns about the "plan" sometimes, but I'm not the expert. My kid is safe, happy and progressing in a positive environment, so though no scenario is perfect I feel very lucky.

 

[sewgood]

Both of my girls love their coaches.

 

[mommyof1]

I love that my daughter's gym is run like an actual business.

 

[Gym-Mom]

I love my daughter's coach. She is calm and caring, but still pushes the gymnasts. My daughter is five and with older girls. Her coach knows that she has to adapt her coaching style for her sometimes, but she still expects just as much out of her.

 

[3gymgirlsmom]

Mine do , all 3 have wonderful caring coaches

 

[cbifoja]

My daughter is five and with older girls. Her coach knows that she has to adapt her coaching style for her sometimes, but she still expects just as much out of her.

This is SO important and it's great that your coach doesn't need reminded of this!

When mine was in 2nd or 3rd grade, a coach kept talking to her about getting her split jump up to 180. This went on for weeks until in a frustrated episode, DD went off in the car. Told me she didn't know what it meant. Originally thought she meant 180 split jumps! She was still learning to count money...angle measurements were still way ahead of her time.

 

[duyetanh]

I am thrilled to hear so many people out their like their coach or like their kids coaches;this is awesome.

 

[Sk8ermaiden]

The coach over the pre team at our gym is incredible. I can't say enough good things about her. She's been doing this forever and she just really *gets* kids and knows how to get the best out of each one. A lot of the moms with kids on pre team come from pretty far away just because at this low level you can't find as good a coach at this level at another gym. She coaches rec too and before any of us even knew about team gym, LOTS of moms were following her from rec level to level (there are over a dozen rec coaches) because she's just such a great coach. The other coach who helps with pre team is great as well.

 

[Midwestmommy]

My daughter likes most of them most of the time. One recently handled communication around a difficult situation in a way that was at best indifferent, at worst mean-spirited toward our daughter.... Chipped away at her trust in him and really disappointed me. But we will all get over it eventually (not a deal breaker but it was insensitive and disappointing). Despite their strenth and discipline and skill in the gym, these are NOT mini adults who are mature beyond their years. As anyone who is with them in the car after practice knows..... they are kids first and foremost.

 

[Judybird]

We love our gym's coaches and have built up trust in them through the years. I think the role of a gym coach is so different from that of other sports' coaches or school teachers. They work together so many hours over multiple years. I feel fortunate that my DD has so many great ones!

 

[stxrdusty]

A couple years ago I switched gyms along with many teammates and our head coach. There were several reasons for the switch including coaching issues at the old gym. I personally had no dislike towards the old coach, nor any of my other coaches. Even my dislike of any specific coach I ever had was short-lived and I found something I liked and appreciated about every coach I've ever had. I consider myself lucky for having so many good coaches in my life. Since going going to college I've found I miss them all, even those I haven't seen in years, and I look forward to the day I can see them again and thank them if at all possible.

 

[lovemygymnast]

If it wasn't for our coaches, we wouldn't be there! They have genuine concern for her and are very encouraging.

I don't feel my dd can talk to them about outside issues but she's just in compulsory. There are optional gymnasts who are teens and they do seem to spend a lot of time outside gym with the optional coach. She's very friendly with them. That's good & bad in my opinion. I much prefer trust and respect and not be friendly with them.