Anon Owner searching bags for cell phones

[Anonymous (f2ee)]

I am seeking guidance because I feel like I am perhaps overreacting but maybe not?

Our gym owner recently shared with the girls that she doesn't like cell phones. In a matter of weeks, it's gone from "phones rot your brains" to phones not being allowed out to film new skills or at breaks. Ok - I can deal with this as many times our coaches are the ones who will film new skills/text the videos to the parents. And I would rather my daughter use her short break to eat vs. scroll. I think most parents are okay with this.

However, earlier this week, she announced that phones were not allowed to be brought to practice at all. This is obviously not realistic - many girls come straight from school, have varying ride situations, etc. I told my daughter she needed to be sure to leave her phone in her bag from the minute she leaves the car. This so far, has been fine.

Yesterday, the owner announced the girls must put give their phones to the front desk and if they need to reach their parent, they can use the single phone at the gym. This is not okay with me. I do not believe there should be a "gatekeeper" for a child to reach out to their parent, especially when they are at the gym for as many hours as our girls are. Additionally, my kiddo is not going to go ask the 18-year old front desk guy if she can use the phone if she's feeling uncomfortable (for any reason). It just feels icky to me that my daughter is essentially prevented from reaching out to me if she needs me. Not to mention in a true emergency situation - the girls are supposed to line up and wait for their turn on the phone? Or wait until the front desk can sort out whose phone is whose? Nope.

Anyway, yesterday at practice the gym owner WENT THROUGH THE BACKPACKS of the team to see who still had phones while the girls were warming up. The girls cannot see the team lounge from the main part of the gym so this was done without their knowledge. She kicked every girl out of practice who had a phone she could find. There were a few girls whose phones she did not find.

Is this out of line? I feel like this is such a red flag. I am so upset.

 

[Anonymous (feab)]

You are not over reacting. I can see confiscating it if they are using it during practice but giving it to the front desk or searching their bags is ridiculous.

 

[Anonymous (d745)]

Yea that’s literally insane. I’d be having a meeting asap to discuss. Going through the bags would almost be enough for me to pull my daughter.

Our gym used to collect all the girls phones into a box/basket at the beginning of practice, but the basket was in the gym and honestly accessible for the girls to grab their phones back if needed. Our coaches have since chilled out about phone usage, and allow them to use them for filming etc.

 

[Anonymous (1217)]

You are not overeacting. Going through a gymnasts bag is inappropriate and crosses many many boundaries.

 

[Anonymous (0212)]

You are not overreacting. This is a red flag. It is completely inappropriate for the gym owner to be going through personal belongings, unless there is a safety concern for the gymnast.

 

[Anonymous (3440)]

I'd be leaving that gym YESTERDAY, and filing theft charges against the owner. (probably wouldn't be able to do that...but i'm just sayin'. You're going into my bag without my permission and taking something that doesn't belong to you. Isn't that theft?)

 

[Anonymous (f2ee)]

OP here, and thanks all for making me feel better. I am incredibly uncomfortable with the entire situation and am not sure what to do. My daughter enjoys her teammates and coaches and the owner isn't her coach but dang - this gives me considerable pause about her/the gym. She's been controlling in the past but nothing like this.

 

[Anonymous (3440)]

This sounds like an owner on a power trip tbh.

 

[Anonymous (2d1f)]

Searching the girls' bags is completely out of line and would concern me.

 

[Anonymous (3d9e)]

My DD's gym had two major incidents with phones and had to implement a phone bucket where they stored their phones until practice was done. They eventually relaxed on that stance (mostly due to the offenders leaving the gym) but at our gym the parents supported the decision due to the incidents with the phones.

I wouldn't be OK with searching bags but was OK with all gymnasts not using the phones during practice and volunteering to keep them in the bucket.

 

[Anonymous (7caa)]

This is insane to the point that you should seriously consider the possibility that the owner is having a mental health episode. The obsession with phones sounds like it may be a sign of paranoia. I would tread lightly as you might be dealing with a genuinely unstable person. I think you should start watching practice and sit near the gym gossips to try to figure out if this is typically inappropriate behavior by the owner or if this is unusual behavior. I would not be the first or the loudest voice protesting this action. You want your watch how this shakes out.