Please help me!

[mayestra12]

My daughter is six and has received offers from two different gyms to join their team. I have no idea what kind of questions to ask to make this decision? How do I know which gym / coaches are best for her?

My daughter attended recreational classes at Gym #1 last school year (during Kindergarten) and just finished a week at their camp for her age group and they want her to be on their "mini team" in the fall which only competes against themselves.

In preparation for mini team I let her go to Gym #2 (Gym #1 did not have any summer classes) for a class and a few off and on weeks of summer camp. She liked it there too and has been asked to join their Level 3 team in the fall. They do three competitions.

I'm so confused and feel like I have no idea what to do for her. Both teams practice twice a week for two hours. HELP! I have no background in gymnastics so I really don't know what to do.

 

[Gymdad2]

I don't think the decision of which gym is right for your dd is as important now as which gym is right for you. A six year old on pre team or mini team of L3 is going to gym to improve her physical condition, to start to learn the basics, to have fun and it sounds like either gym can provide this. What you didn't mention is cost and convenience for you. Is one closer, less expensive, better timing, near a shopping center or library, etc.? Remember that this gymnastic journey can turn out to be a long one, and if your dd does stay with it there will be plenty of time in the future to consider your options for her once you have been around it for a while. Right now I suggest you choose whichever gym is easiest for you and your family. Good luck.

 

[mayestra12]

Thanks.

Gym #1 is closer but more expensive than Gym #2. The practice times for Gym #2 are a bit more convenient as I can drop her off and my husband can pick her up after work (saving me another outing with my 2 year old).


Gym #1 is very established and Gym #2 is newer so the staff at Gym #1 is trying to make me feel that they are the better choice (also considering they had her all last year). They feel Gym #2 is geared towards boys gymnastics and doesn't have the all the same equipment. I don't know what to think.

I know at her current level it really shouldn't matter that much but I can't help but feel torn...

I also know her opinion counts but I feel at six she is not capable of making this decision. She doesn't want to disappoint anyone as she likes the coaches at both places...

Should I ask any questions to the coaches? Just curious if I should get more input or just talk to my husband and decide?

 

[cher062]

I think that a 6yo can give input. try asking her questions about what she liked at each gym. Who was her favorite coach. ask her which she would choose to go to if she could only go to one. Take that in to consideration.

I know for me I like the idea of cheaper and dad picking up as both seem to have equal abilities at this level. That way dad can see her doing her thing too. My DD loves dad picking up and being able to see her and she is 13. Don't forget too your not married to a gym. You can try one this year and if you don't like it then you can switch to another. Pick the one at this age and level that works best for the adults.

 

[gym law mom]

I would get more info on both programs. Usually you don't see a gym program geared more for boys than girls, so that statement is rather odd.

Here's what I would ask: Gym#1: What exactly is mini team other than 4 hours/week? What will my dd learn this next year? Is it in preparation for moving onto a club team and if so at what level?
My one concern was you mentioned this gym did not have any summer classes for her which sounds strange since gyms make big bucks off rec and pre-team classes. If she did mini team, would there be a summer program for her next year?

For gym #2; Ask questions about how much it will cost to have her on a L3 team. You may find the money you would have to shell out for team, makes this gym more expensive than gym #1. Costs you could expect would be USAG membership, team leo, possibly team warm up and gym bag. I would also ask if they have some team parent association or booster club that does fundraising. You would probably not benefit much the 1st year, but it would be good to know any requirements they might have. My guess is you would be paying meet entry fees plus coaches fees out of pocket this year since dd is new to they gym/booster club. I would also ask where the meets are. Do they stay fairly local or are you looking at 2-3 hour drives to meets. You would be surprised how quickly a gym meet sucks up a weekend.

I think if you can get some concrete answers to both programs it might help you decide whicn way to go.

Remember, we're always around here to translate "gym speak."

 

[mayestra12]

Good questions...I do know some of the answers already.

For Gym #1....mini team is the first step to the competitive team (they are considered on the team). After mini team they go to the developmental team and from there (assuming they are ready) they go to level 5 (which is when they really start to compete). Mini team only competes against themselves (so really no competitions and the developmental team does compete outside the gym). Mini team is basically L3 without the title and developmental is L4.

The recreational program runs during the school year only (they base everything including team on a 10 week cycle). They have 4 camp weeks during the summer (2 for Levels 1-4 and 2 for ages 3-Kindergarten). The team practices eat up all the other gym time (I'm assuming). DD would practice with the team next summer (no need for camp or classes). Mini team costs almost double what I spent on classes last school year but I don't think there are any other fees other than a team leo.

Gym #2 has a monthly fee plus team leo, bag, and warm ups and meet fees since she will compete outside of the gym in Level 3 (they told me she has 3 meets) so I'm sure the costs would equal out or end up being more for this year. Meets in L3 are local. Not sure why Gym #1 coach would tell me about the boys program. Maybe the boys coach is better than the girls? Gym #1 does not have a boys program. Gym #1 has foam pits and Gym #2 does not so they keep stressing safety to me. Do foam pits make one gym that much safer?

Still confused...will have to think of more questions.

 

[cher062]

I would get more info on both programs. Usually you don't see a gym program geared more for boys than girls, so that statement is rather odd.

I have and still do. I can tell you which gyms in my area are more focused on the boys team and which are more focused on the girls teams.

 

[gym law mom]

Having pits makes it much easier to teach/train tumbling, higher level vaults, bar dismounts---really just about anything you could think of. Can a gymnast learn all the skills without a pit---yes, but it can be more difficult.

Coaches will use pits even with the younger girls to start introducing a new skill, so I guess on that point, gym#1 would have an edge.

It may be that gym#2 is developing a boys team and the coaches at the other gym see this as not being as interested in a girls program. Its tough to do both well and gymnastics is not as popular with boys as it is with girls. Of course with a boys program, they would have to have the equipment to train all of the boys events.

Levels 1-4 are not required competitive levels in USAG and it sounds like gym#1 is taking the approach of using a couple of years to do basics and train for L5 which is the 1st required level for girls.

Sounds like you're really doing your homework.

I know dd has been at both gyms for camps, but have you had a chance to watch the L3 team and the mini team practice? That is sometimes a good idea. Watch to see how the coaches and girls interact, is the practice structured, do the girls look like they are having a good time etc. Sometimes you can get some info from other parents there watching that is helpful.

 

[mayestra12]

Thanks so much everyone. I really appreciate the input and the chance to "think" through this here!

I did get to see the team at Gym #1 for a little bit before DD's camp. It was impressive. Very well run and organized and the camp was too. I didn't get to see the structured part of camp at Gym #2, only open gym time. DD is taking a summer class there too and it's also run well.

I haven't seen an L3 practice at Gym #2 but I have seen the team and the coach. The main girl's coach doesn't coach L3 but DD's teacher from the class does and she likes her too. Gym #1 mentioned that all their coaches are safety certified and led me to believe the staff at Gym #2 is not as qualified.

I'm still in awe of the costs and can imagine that it only goes up as the gym time increases. Yikes!

DD is signed up at Gym #2 for one more week of camp the week of 8/23-8/27. Mini team starts 9/7 and L3 would start 8/31! She also has her class at Gym #2 this Wed. I'm guessing it would be a good idea to tell them we are now thinking about both programs? I don't want them to treat her differently but I also want to be honest so they aren't shocked if we don't come back for the fall.

 

[gym law mom]

I wouldn't feel like you have to make any committment with gym#2 this week although you could tell them you are still considering both programs and would like more info on what they offer. Ask how much the team apparel costs---they may get the less expensive leos and such for L3 since they only compete 3 tmes/year. See what they have to say about uptraining(teaching the skills for the next level). At only 4 hours/week I would imagine they will be putting alot of time into the skills and routines for L3. Maybe you could ask if dd could try a practice with their L3 team to see how she likes it---that would give you the chance to observe. Most gyms offer a free trial class.

As far as safety certification, that is required of all coaches that are on the floor during meets. I can tell you the USAG course does not make coaches into paramedics-----its really basic first aide. Sounds like the gym#1 coaches are being a little catty here unless they know or are suspicious of some problems with gym#2, but don't feel at liberty to discuss.

Sounds like both gyms have positives/negatives and probably either would work now for your dd. It may come down to the question of whether you want to start competitive gymnastics now or hold off for a year or 2.

 

[cher062]

Thanks so much everyone. I really appreciate the input and the chance to "think" through this here!

I did get to see the team at Gym #1 for a little bit before DD's camp. It was impressive. Very well run and organized and the camp was too. I didn't get to see the structured part of camp at Gym #2, only open gym time. DD is taking a summer class there too and it's also run well.

I haven't seen an L3 practice at Gym #2 but I have seen the team and the coach. The main girl's coach doesn't coach L3 but DD's teacher from the class does and she likes her too. Gym #1 mentioned that all their coaches are safety certified and led me to believe the staff at Gym #2 is not as qualified.

I'm still in awe of the costs and can imagine that it only goes up as the gym time increases. Yikes!

DD is signed up at Gym #2 for one more week of camp the week of 8/23-8/27. Mini team starts 9/7 and L3 would start 8/31! She also has her class at Gym #2 this Wed. I'm guessing it would be a good idea to tell them we are now thinking about both programs? I don't want them to treat her differently but I also want to be honest so they aren't shocked if we don't come back for the fall.

All USAG coaches have to have safety certification through USAG. If the club is a USAG club there are minimum standards. My son became a Jr coach for the boys team at 16 and had to go and get safety certified. Now that he is 18 he also has to do the criminal background check required by USAG for team coaches. He also has been to some of the USAG workshops offered out there as well as some of the online stuff offered. All the team coaches are certified no matter what gym you go to.

So no matter what gym you choose that certification part is the same requirement for all. The difference will be in the style of coaching. There are as many styles as there are coaches and what style fits your DD best only you and your DD will know for sure. My DD's new gym has coaches that sooooo much fit her learning style soooo much better than her old gym and she is sooo much happier, more confident, and now is setting goals for when she is L8, 9 and 10 ( she is L7 now) which she wasn't doing before and she is getting skills so much quicker.

 

[MaryA]

If I had known then what I know now, I probably would have started my daughter off at a different gym. Switching gyms can be really hard. I would love to switch my daughter, but she is very bonded to her team-mates, and I admire that, so I'm not going to force things. I'm hoping she will decide on her own eventually that she's not getting what she needs from her current gym. So I guess what I'm saying is that you should look ahead, not just at this upcoming year but at the program as a whole, because if she sticks with it, it will be easier if you can stay with the same gym. Ask around and see if you can talk to parents from both gyms. In addition to the price, hours, convenience, equiptment, coaches, etc. be sure to ask about what I call the "drama quotient." Stuff like some kids getting more attention from the coaches than others, coaches talking about your kid to other parents when you're not around (yes, that happens at our gym, and it makes me crazy), focus on things like cheering for your team members and a taking a hard line on superiority complexes and general meanness among team members... that kind of thing. Good luck with your choice!

 

[mayestra12]

Thanks again for all the advice!

I do worry a lot of having to switch her later. I feel like that would be hard (I have some experiences like this as I was a competitive swimmer growing up).

I sat through her classes all last year at Gym #1 and listened to team parents at the same time and it wasn't pretty. I really felt like I wouldn't fit in but it doesn't really matter if I don't fit and if DD does, right?

Hopefully I can see what team coach at Gym #2 says as I've seen him but never talked to him before. He's been pulling DD out of camp to workout with the team and she's learned a lot this summer.

I'm leaning toward Gym #1 (for some unknown reason) but I'm still worried about what is best. I don't want to talk to DD about it more until she's finished camp at Gym #2.

 

[mayestra12]

Oh, the other thing with Gym #1 being closer to home DD is more likely to make friends that live close by and go to her school. That might be a factor to consider too. I know she was bummed out that the friends she made at camp at Gym #2 had never even heard of her school!

 

[ginnymac]

Thanks again for all the advice!

I sat through her classes all last year at Gym #1 and listened to team parents at the same time and it wasn't pretty. I really felt like I wouldn't fit in but it doesn't really matter if I don't fit and if DD does, right?

I disagree with this. Parents who are petty, annoying, competitive and otherwise difficult to deal with often (not always) have petty, annoying and competitive daughters. I would take this into consideration. You *may* end up spending lots of time with these people and their daughters.

I have also found over the years (across many sports/activities) that if coaches/owners/teachers don't tolerate this behavior it can't breed. Sometimes, the coaches get caught up into this and the end result is not pretty.

Not saying this should be a primary consideration, but a consideration nonetheless.

Good luck with your decision!

Oh, one other thing. My dd dives and one of the things she likes is that no one from her school does it. She has completely different friendships at both places and enjoys the separation. Going to school and gym with friends from school is not necessary for a positive experience!

 

[mayestra12]

I guess why I'm still struggling so much is that deep down I feel the training / facilities are better at Gym #1 but the "newness" of Gym #2 (just opened in 2008) makes it a more "friendly" environment.

I'm really interested to see what coach at Gym #2 has to say.

 

[MaryA]

I disagree with this. Parents who are petty, annoying, competitive and otherwise difficult to deal with often (not always) have petty, annoying and competitive daughters. I would take this into consideration. You *may* end up spending lots of time with these people and their daughters.

Amen to this! I have definitely found that the mothers that I have the most difficultly getting along with have the daughters that my daughter has trouble getting along with.

If you get a bad gut feeling from the moms at Gym #1 I would take that seriously into consideration. For better or for worse, these families are going to become a big part of your life. See if you get better vibes from Gym #2, or see if you can talk to a couple of mothers from Gym #2.

Also, I do think that competing Level 3 and Level 4 was really good for my daughter. When she started, I think she was too young to feel anxious about competing. She was just thrilled to get dressed up in her sparkly leotard and get a gift bag and a "participation" medal and go home. So while now, at level 5 (age 9) she's aware of things like deductions and rankings and such, she still doesn't seem the least bit nervous about competing. I think starting out young really helped with that. It's "old hat" to her now.

 

[mayestra12]

That was one thing I liked about Gym #2 was that she would get a feel for the competitions.

 

[Bajanswife]

For rec classes, it really doesn't matter what the parents are like, they don't get much influence. But when you join a team, the other parents can really make a huge difference to the whole experience. You have to travel to meets with these people, where, even if it's a local meet, you usually don't just drop off and pick up, but you stay and watch and get into the team spirit. We have such a great group of parents at our gym - I can't imagine not having that now, and having to deal with catty, competitive moms.

Choosing a gym must be a tough decision - I'm glad I never had to make it, we only have one gym. And I know how lucky I am that we have great parents!

 

[mayestra12]

During her rec classes it was the team parents I heard talking. Thinking about it now it was really just one mom that seemed over the top. I remember feeling sorry for the others that had to listen to her....

Luckily, this mom's dd is older than mine....