Anon Question for parents/coaches of extremely talented athletes, from parent of an average one

[Anonymous (c64b)]

Asking on behalf of my daughter, who is a strong gymnast and is progressing steadily, but very average at a gym with elites and future elites:

What do the truly talented/prodigy gymnasts think of the “regular” gymnasts in their midst? I’m not looking for answers if you’re at a gym where elites/future elites/fast track athletes are in separate practices.

Until recently, all of our gymnasts trained at the same time, so elites were alongside level 3s, etc, for at least part of their workout. The regular, one level/year girls were constantly being compared to the fast tracked and elite path girls by coaches and told that they needed to work hard like them if they ever wanted to move up, stay in DP, etc. The entire gym halts practice to watch certain fast track girls’ new skills and routines. If meet sessions overlap and lower level girls don’t cheer enough for the fast track/elite path girls, they get scolded before awards for not having team spirit. But the expectation is that those girls shouldn’t use their energy for lower level girls because they need to focus on their routines. Basically all of the energy in the gym is channeled to the most talented girls.

My vent aside, my daughter definitely thinks about these girls a lot. It’s fair to say that all of the girls at the gym who are the same age as these girls but many levels younger notice them, are told to notice them by coaches, and have a certain degree of envy even though they’re proud of them.

My daughter said something yesterday like I wonder what it feels like to do level 3-8 in less time than will take me to do compulsories? And she has wondered what it would be like to get a new skill in one try or in a few days, compared to the months or years it takes her, or what it’s like to never get below 2nd AA for an entire competitive career.

I’m guessing the answer is that they don’t actually think of girls like my daughter at all, and they might even assume that girls who struggle or don’t progress quickly don’t work hard or aren’t trying. But I didn’t say that.

Coaches/parents, do you think your super talented prodigies have opinions or thoughts about their less successful teammates? Or is their bubble and personal progress so separate that they don’t even notice them?

 

[Anonymous (fe73)]

Can only relate my experience (or my daughter's really). They train in a gym with elites and DP, they all train at the same time. Now just to be clear it is basically the L9, 10 and Elites. They train in mixed groups so its not just elites in one group and DP in in another. I would strongly disagree with your assumption, at least for the girls at that level and age. The elite or "super-talented" DP girls first, appreciate the amount of work and difficulty involved in this sport. They respect any gymnast who shows up at the gym, locks-in and works hard in practice. They definitely do not like girls that come to gym for social hour or time wasters during practice. They are right there cheering for girls to get new skills even if it is one they mastered long ago. Second, many of these girls have the same fears and self-doubt that any gymnast who has been doing this sport long enough experiences. They love this sport and appreciate there really isnt that much margin of difference between elite and L10.

One final note, I do firmly believe in the culture of a gym. Culture starts at the top, the owner and coaches set that. My DD's gym seems to have a completely different culture than yours. All gymnasts are celebrated, no one is made to feel "less-than" because they are not elite. As I said all accomplishments are celebrated. They would never stop practice just so an elite could show a new skill. I'm not going to say that elites dont get a little extra attention, but its kinda the nature of training at that level. But they certainly aren't touted as a class above any others. Also, there might be some age/maturity at play here. Girls that are 9-10 years old and in an environment that constantly touts them might have that "me" centric viewpoint. That typically changes by the time they get to 14-16 after experiencing injuries and blocks and setbacks and other high-performing gymnasts.

 

[Anonymous (93c7)]

Usually the elites I've met (different system and country) are super nice to young girls.
I once went to an elite training center with one of my gymnasts who was really young at the time and they congratulated her in a nice double turn she did.
Maybe at a young age and in a toxic environment they can get a little entitled but as a whole I don't think so.
In our gym sometimes we stop to watch a new cool skill from the higher levels, but also we stop and clap for a new easy skill, like a back walkover.

 

[Anonymous (6c46)]

Last Thursday, the entire gym cheered when 3 of the rising Level 4s got their kips for the first time. That included the girls on vault working Yurchenko fulls.

 

[Anonymous (5454)]

In my opinion the culture of your gym is very off. Most elite girls are not treated like this anywhere else from my understanding. Every gym has their favorites that are going to get more attention and special treatment than others, but definitely definitely not to this extent.

 

[Anonymous (3c31)]

One thing to note, what looks like getting a skill 1-2 tries or in one day may actually be something they've been working on in private lessons for several weeks. I know of one young phenom who would work on a skill in private lessons until she had it, and then in practice say "Can I try such-&-such"? And then do the skill and get praised for being able to throw it her first try. It was annoying, and I got what was happening, but like I said, what seems to be getting it right away may actually be a lot work behind the scenes.

In general, our high performing and uber talented gymnasts are very friendly and kind and cheer for their teammates at practice and meets. And yes, they do get more attention because they are training/are elites, but overall they are a nice group of girls who have their struggles and blocks, and are encouraging and supportive of all the others.

 

[Ty’s Dad]

We just left a gym where they started putting compulsory girls in with the elites and my daughter hated it. It wasn’t a stuck up type of hate, it was more like the elites need to get ready for season, but the coaches have to go help kids with a back tuck or whatever level 4s and 5s do.

 

[Anonymous (c64b)]

We just left a gym where they started putting compulsory girls in with the elites and my daughter hated it. It wasn’t a stuck up type of hate, it was more like the elites need to get ready for season, but the coaches have to go help kids with a back tuck or whatever level 4s and 5s do.

Actually what we are experiencing is the opposite. Compulsory coaches will leave a rotation to go cheer on a fast track girl or to help with the fast track group because one of their coaches has to go help with elite. Or it will be the compulsories’ hour on floor but they’ll lose half of it because a HOPES girl needs run-throughs or they want to video an instagymmie to repost on the gym’s instagram.

It leads to what seems like an attitude of entitlement but maybe I’m missing something that explains it. For example, for a while my daughter shared a locker with a girl her age who was training HOPES. They had a shelf and equal space, but the girl kept throwing my daughter’s stuff out of the locker because “you don’t need room for your stuff.” They both had the same amount of stuff and it’s not like my daughter wasn’t in grips or anything.

It does sound like elites/parents look down on compulsories from their own bubble, so I guess I got my question answered. Even casual comments like “a back tuck or whatever level 4 and 5s do” makes it sound like compulsory skills are so basic and easy that an elite parent can’t fathom someone needing help with it.

 

[Anonymous (958f)]

A lot of the elite track girls have a lot of pressure on them and I get why a gym wants to help them feel good about themselves because their are a lot of days they are going home feeling like they will never get to whatever level/skill they are expected to get and that they are a total failure.

That being said your paying money for your child to have the best experience possible not ensure that someone else's child sees their true potential. I would walk away from an environment like that where the standard track girls don't feel good about themselves.

 

[Anonymous (31f5)]

I am a parent to 3 gymnasts, two of which received much more attention and were labeled *talented" elites. I watched from the side as my older gymnast who was labeled 'not as talented" worked her butt off, failure after failure, shaft after shaft.

Guess which daughter is a junior elite today. The one labeled "not talented" for years. She is an inspiration to
our family and proof that hard work can beat talent, and that noone has to accept the "labeling" that other girls or coaches may put upon out girls.