Respect Issues

[gymnafreak]

So we have 20 girls in our top teams and we are having major respect issues. Nobody stays and listens to what the coach is telling them after they do a skill, and when a coach tells us to do something, we just roll our eyes, walk away, or tell them no. The coaches are getting really annoyed. And so am i.(not saying i'm not a part of it) but its gotten really bad lately. What can i do (other than being more respectful myself). There are some really young girls on the teams and they are looking up to us and starting to do what we are doing as far as disrepecting goes, and it really needs to be fixed, but how?

 

[Geoffrey Taucer]

So we have 20 girls in our top teams and we are having major respect issues. Nobody stays and listens to what the coach is telling them after they do a skill, and when a coach tells us to do something, we just roll our eyes, walk away, or tell them no.

And they haven't been booted off the team yet? Your coaches are a lot more patient than I am. While I have yet to directly kick a kid off team for behavior like this, I've kicked kids out of practice for it. On multiple occasions.

There's not much you can do other than change your own behavior. Be respectful to them, and allow others to follow your example. I know in a group the peer pressure to continue the disrespect is massive, and it's extremely difficult to go against the grain. But see if you can do it anyway; it clearly bothers you that you're not getting what you could out of practice and that you're setting a bad example for those who look up to you, so change it in yourself. Not much else you can do.

I suspect that you'll find that once the coaches realize that you're giving them more respect than others in your group, they'll enjoy coaching you a lot more, put a lot more effort into working with you, and you'll find that you'll leave your groupmates in the dust.

 

[coachmolly]

I suspect that you'll find that once the coaches realize that you're giving them more respect than others in your group, they'll enjoy coaching you a lot more, put a lot more effort into working with you, and you'll find that you'll leave your groupmates in the dust.

Exactly! I'm always more willing to give a gymnast who is trying really hard an extra turn or incentive to keep up the good work.
You could talk to your coaches or an older teammate who has somewhat of a leadership role. They could in turn talk to the team about what's going on and how you can work on improving as a group. You could even implement some kind of group consequence, like extra conditioning based on your attitudes that day.

 

[Geoffrey Taucer]

You could even implement some kind of group consequence, like extra conditioning based on your attitudes that day.

I dunno, I'd be worried that might just cause more resentment of the coaches and more attitude.

I say respect the coaches and let the results speak for themselves.

 

[cathiann]

I'm kind of surprised the coaches haven't done something about it. I think our coaches would bench a gymnast for that kind of attitude.

You say the older girls are doing it too? I'm not sure what you can do (without having them get snotty towards you too) beyond setting an example yourself.

 

[I-Heart-Beam]

Personally, I would tell everyone to shut up and go home if they didn't want to be there. I had no problems doing it when I was at gym to the younger girls, but if they are the same age as you then maybe its not as easy as that. I'm guessing there's a ringleader. Why not start up the conversation gradually and say something like: Are you leaving, sounds like you aren't really enjoying yourself anymore. If they don't get the hint from that, well, you might just have to say something.

I can't believe the coach is allowing that! A sigh would get you kicked out of our gym!!

 

[CoachGoofy]

So we have 20 girls in our top teams and we are having major respect issues. Nobody stays and listens to what the coach is telling them after they do a skill, and when a coach tells us to do something, we just roll our eyes, walk away, or tell them no. The coaches are getting really annoyed. And so am i.(not saying i'm not a part of it) but its gotten really bad lately. What can i do (other than being more respectful myself). There are some really young girls on the teams and they are looking up to us and starting to do what we are doing as far as disrepecting goes, and it really needs to be fixed, but how?

Stop being part of it.

I wouldn't stand for it as a coach, as an athlete I wouldn't have gotten away with it, but change has to start somewhere.

Try leading the way. Maybe the other girls will snap out of their attitudes, and if they don't, maybe the coaches will see this isn't teens being teens and institute consequences.

 

[gymnafreak]

I am the the third oldest on the team, but only by months. A lot of the little girls look up to me because i'm always encouraging them and helping them. And they've realized that i'm pretty good and that i usually have a good attitude. Which is just another reason to fix my attitude, which i'm trying to do, and its getting better.

 

[BlairBob]

Set the example. Be the change you want to be. Somebody said that, either Gahndi or JFK, I can't recall which but I think it was the former. Let it spread like wildfire.

Do your coaches respect you all?

 

[gymnafreak]

My coaches respect me most of the time, but sometimes they assume that i do or say stuff (like yesterday. Grr!) and they believe everything that everyone else says. We have a board of parents and there are only three of us on the team that don't have a parent on the board because we live far away. The one girl's parent yell at the coaches a lot, so she gets special treatment along with all the other girls who have parents on the board. I'd say they respect me, but they don't treat me (or the one other girl) the same as everyone else. It seems like they get special priveledges. There's this fairly new coach now and she can't spot anything (whats new?) but she can tell you what you are doing wrong and what you can do to fix it. She is taking a special interest to me and one of the other girls who are both really high leveled.
So i'd say they respect us, but they don't always believe me or my friend and they are kinda not so worried about us, because our parents aren't on the board.

 

[justcallmecoach]

Exactly! I'm always more willing to give a gymnast who is trying really hard an extra turn or incentive to keep up the good work.

Since I replied to your other post I didn't want to seem like I was picking on you so I would say respect does go both ways. If you show them you are willing to listen and respect their word then they may give you more positive attention. So you mentioned twice that there is a new coach taking a special interest to you, do you or this other girl mind it?

Also I agree with everyone else by stop being a part of it and also I have to give you some respect points in realizing you are doing it and trying to stop it. Hope everything works out for you.

 

[gymnafreak]

Yeah, there is this new coach and i'm really liking her. She can't spot anything much, but she was supposedly a fairly good gymnast and she always knows just what to tell you on your skills. She is really encouraging and she has this personality that fits really good with mine and this other girl. The other girl has pretty much the same skills as me, and a few higher on a couple events. This coach has been talking about all these plans she has for both of us for the summer, and she talks about having us condition with her (she conditions really really hard!) instead of with the group because we need more conditioning, which i agree with but we also need more stretching. (Thats another long story). This other girl and i are both excited to get some attention from somebody, even if they can't spot anything. Usually we are kinda left out because our parents aren't on the board. The other girl and i are reallly good friends, and the new coach is giving us both a lot of attention, so neither one of us minds.
Now if only we could get a coach who could spot stuff...