Parents Struggling level 6 gymnast

[gymgal]

This is about your daughter and whether she still sees value in gymnastics. Reality check - If the expense wouldn't be an issue if she was winning, then it shouldn't be an issue now. Throw away those dreams of elite and college scholarships. Sure, it might happen but the chances for any gymnast to make it to that level are minuscule. Everything has to align - talent, drive, finances, family support, staying healthy, and so much more. Right now, the focus is on whether she enjoys the sport, is continuing to progress (not measured just by scores), and it is still healthy for her both physically and mentally. She will decide in her own time and on her own terms whether gymnastics is getting "too hard". If you let her make that decision, she will transition to another sport more easily. Lots of girls make this decision around middle school, when the peer pressure to have more free time skyrockets and school sports come into play. Bars is often the deciding factor but beam too, if there are fears.

 

[bookworm]

For perspective, my oldest's highest score in ANY compulsory level (4, 5 and 6) was 32.00....and we were dancing in the streets when she got that because she could move to level 7. Some kids do better once they get out of compulsories and that's what her coaches figured she'd do...

She went on to have a multi year Level 10 career and compete as a D1 scholarshiped athlete. So you just never know how they'll do...

 

[Deleted member 18037]

She whips around bars. Runs at stationary objects and flips over them. She jumps and returns on a 4 inch beam 4 ft off the ground. Even in last place that’s more then most people.

We’re fortunate that we can pay for gymnastics.But it’s not about placements.
Mine has had her time at the top of the podium, middle of the pack, bottom of the podium (injuries, puberty and Covid were hard) and she is heading back towards podium finishes. At 16. She has 2 more seasons and then she graduates HS. And that will likely be the end of gymnastics

Gymnastics has taught her so much, given her good friends, made her strong, which helps her lacrosse.

She has her share of medals and that is not what we pay for.

I don’t know your family or financial situation. But it shouldn’t be about medals.

 

[GymAir]

Some gymnasts like to train, and some like to compete. Personally, I put up with the competitions so I could be in the gym as much as possible doing gymnastics. I’m middle-aged now and I still love handstands and flipping. The gym is my happy place.

Also: NO ONE who makes it to level 6 is bad at gymnastics. Seriously. If you understood the sheer number of kids that quit rather than push on to level 6. Level 6 is all kinds of scary! Flyaways, back walkovers and back handsprings on the beam - it’s “real” gymnastics. Don’t compare her to other gymnasts - compare her to herself. She has worked very hard to get where she is at, and she should be proud of herself.

 

[Gymmom123!]

For perspective, my oldest's highest score in ANY compulsory level (4, 5 and 6) was 32.00....and we were dancing in the streets when she got that because she could move to level 7. Some kids do better once they get out of compulsories and that's what her coaches figured she'd do...

She went on to have a multi year Level 10 career and compete as a D1 scholarshiped athlete. So you just never know how they'll do...

Thank you for that! That’s very encouraging!

 

[Pineapple_Lump]

I think you need to consider how your daughter might be feeling. It is unlikely that she understands the complexity of her situation relative to others. It must be rather de-motivating to not be as good as you thought you were in comparison to others. Especially as she was winning a lot, but more so if she was winning without a great deal of effort because the rules for that level worked in her favor.
She needs encouragement and small achievable goals that have nothing to do with scores. If there is an issue with training effort, then she might need training goals too. Especially if she had not had to struggle for skills in the past - it might be a case of just not knowing how to work hard because she never had to. Sometimes goof off or give lackluster effort because they have given up on themselves.
She needs you to be proud of her right now, even if that means cherry picking one positive out of a 'bad' beam routine. My favorite positives are ones that relate to life skills and/or effort, 'I love how you kept going'. If you start to look for the positives you will start to see more and hopefully can find peace with where your daughter is currently at.

 

[TumbleTimes4]

Some gymnasts like to train, and some like to compete. Personally, I put up with the competitions so I could be in the gym as much as possible doing gymnastics. I’m middle-aged now and I still love handstands and flipping. The gym is my happy place.

Also: NO ONE who makes it to level 6 is bad at gymnastics. Seriously. If you understood the sheer number of kids that quit rather than push on to level 6. Level 6 is all kinds of scary! Flyaways, back walkovers and back handsprings on the beam - it’s “real” gymnastics. Don’t compare her to other gymnasts - compare her to herself. She has worked very hard to get where she is at, and she should be proud of herself.

I really like this perspective of optionals being real gymnastics. There’s a reason the higher up in levels you go, the fewer gymnasts there are. Anyone whose skilled enough to flip on a 4 inch wide beam and do a cast to handstand on the high bar is good at gymnastics. Their bravery and hard work to perform those scary skills should be praised.

 

[Dahlia]

I think the fact that your daughter doesn't want to quit shows her grit and determination. I've watched a large number of girls who were top of the pack in L3&4 quit when they were mid to bottom of the pack as a L6 because they weren't "good" anymore. Your daughter is willing to work to improve rather than give up because of how she is scoring. That says a lot!

 

[Deleted member 18037]

, 'I love how you kept going'.

The best thing about my kid

 

[LPflip]

My daughter is a level 6 gymnast, she’s not doing the best. Actually her last meet she came in last place with a 33.

When she first started competing in Level 3, she would always be in first or second place but over the years she has not been in the top 10.

My husband and I are really wanting to be done (especially my husband) but my daughter still loves it, but it is an expensive sport and it is tough to watch kids she was better than now be consistently at the top while she’s consistently at the bottom. Should we continue in hopes she’ll improve or has she reached her peak? She has gotten taller and bigger than the other girls, feet sickled at times and does not run fast. Just want to try to make the best decision for her. I’d like to hear honest thoughts and opinions.

Gymnastics is a tough sport! My advice is if your daughter loves it I would let her continue. It’s really not about the medals and placement. It’s about pushing yourself to try new skills. I personally was not a gymnast , but I impressed that all these girls try to do their best every practice and every competition. My daughter has been doing this for 5 years. There have been many bumps in the road but she loves it and that is what matters. I believe if the child is happy doing something the score or placement should not matter.

 

[cp13]

If she is happy and loves the sport, let her continue. Kids gain so much by being involved. Every season is not going to be a top of the podium season. Sometimes it takes 2 years to get to the top of a level and it is hard at the upper levels. My daughter had seasons where she was at the bottom of the pack and we celebrated any placement (7th and 8th place) and then she had seasons where she was at the upper end of the pack and had a lot more success. Regardless of her placement, she always loved her time in the sport.

I think a lot of dads, in particular, get fed up with the sport because of the time commitment, injuries, and expense but I still would want my daughter to decide when she is done rather than the parents making that decision. My daughter did decide to move on from gym in high school and transitioned to diving, which she enjoys but that sport also has monthly tuition, travel and is a big time commitment but at age 16, she says she cannot imagine not being involved in a sport and I am grateful that she has something healthy to be involved in and has an outlet.

 

[SupportingHerDreams]

Thank you all for your responses on here! I have an 8yr old level 4 gymnast that I had been told had so much potential that I expected her to shine when she started competing. But now, in our first season she is the lowest scoring on her team. I think she is doing great and I try to stay focused on things other than scores but it is tempting to worry about her low scores. Reading so many of the replies to this question encouraged me to continue to focus on her personal goals and continue to celebrate every little success despite scores! Thank you all!

 

[Pirouette]

My DD18 was never a top of the podium gymnast. Started at age 11, went through the Xcel program, and always struggled being taller, weaker, and older than her teammates. I honestly don't think she ever hit 37 AA in 6 years of competing.

And now? She's still in the sport, doing club gymnastics at her university. She still loves the sport, despite not being the best at it. It has given her so much more than high scores and medals!

OP, if you can afford to let your daughter continue, and she still has a passion for it, I encourage you to let this journey find its own conclusion. Good luck!

 

[Deleted member 18037]

And now? She's still in the sport, doing club gymnastics at her university. She still loves the sport, despite not being the best at it. It has given her so much more than high scores and medals!

Mine never wanted to do NCAA gymnastics. She is not opposed to perhaps Div 3 lacrosse.

This week we were chatting and I mentioned this summer she (emerging junior) needs to start giving some serious thought about what after HS looks like.

College, away or home, big city or country, large school or small. Work and take longer for a degree. It’s all on the table really. As long as it’s not watching Tik Toc in her room And we circled to sports and I brought up club gymnastics. She was incredulous but beaming…… “I can do that! It’s a thing!”

 

[PeanutsMom]

My daughter is a level 7, for the second year. She was a pretty terrible compulsory gymnast. She medaled 1 time in level 3 and twice in level 4. She finally started to bring home a little hardware in level 5 (just in floor) because she can dance (she loves it). However, she is NOT a competitor. She practices great, has beautiful form, but she cannot stay on the beam to save her life. If she only had to take 3 of 4 events for AA she would win more often. It isn't even that she doesn't like beam, she just can't stay on it. She makes her series, she misses her turn. Makes her series misses her switch leap. There is always something. Last meet before her injury I was so excited that she stayed on the beam her entire routine. It was the best beam routine she had ever done (seriously beautiful) and then she fell on her booty on her dismount. However she still scored an 8.8 so it was a great job. We have had to focus on progress, her progress, not her teammates, not the other kids, hers. In level 4 her first AA score was a 29. By the last meet of the season she scored a 34.8. That is progress. Her first level 7 meet she scored a 35.950. She had never scored in the 35s before. The next meet a 31.200. Competitions are one moment in time. As one of our favorite shirts say Baseball is 9 innings, Football is 4 quarters, Hockey is 3 periods, gymnastics is 1 chance. Its one and done in a meet. A score in a meet does not make them a good or bad gymnast. If they love it, if they work hard, if they keep improving on their time line, they are a gymnast. That's it. Full Stop.

 

[PeanutsMom]

I should also add that this year she has been out of the gym for 8 weeks because she has been dealing with spondylolithesis in her back. She qualified for state twice in her first meets before the injury took her out. She has 4 weeks to get ready for state competition. She will likely place last (she is in a super competitive age group and we have some big gyms in our state that sent 3 kids to Nastia Cup and 2 to Winter Cup) and they dominate her age group. We are fully prepared for a last place finish, but we are so thankful she is healthy enough to go. We are going to girl trip it, play in the hotel pool, compete 2 events (bars and floor) and buy the dang t shirt! She earned it even if it doesn't come with a podium finish.

Another thing, last year during Covid, none of the gyms we went to did awards. Truly the bling is a huge motivator for her. She works hard and the tangible reward is a huge motivator. So I bought some medals. We made a goal chart. State qualifying all-around score -- gold medal, personal best event score -- gold medal, event score of 9.3 or above (gold medal ..that is a BIG number for my daughter). Event Score of 9.0 to 9.3 Silver medal...etc. Then we set in gym goals (get her series upgraded on beam..get the next skill on bars, break a mental block on twisting)... it isn't conventional but all these things are "wins" for her.

 

[Tigtimes]

Thank you all for your responses on here! I have an 8yr old level 4 gymnast that I had been told had so much potential that I expected her to shine when she started competing. But now, in our first season she is the lowest scoring on her team. I think she is doing great and I try to stay focused on things other than scores but it is tempting to worry about her low scores. Reading so many of the replies to this question encouraged me to continue to focus on her personal goals and continue to celebrate every little success despite scores! Thank you all!

FYI the girl that consistently scored the lowest on my daughters level 4 team (they were all 8 yr old) has gone on to be a multi year level 10 who has committed to a top ten D1 team. Winning level 4 does not predict future success !!

 

[MuggleMom]

One of the kids that placed all the time in level 3/4 quit when the girls at gym she was "better than" caught up to her and started getting skills she couldn't get because she had some fears. Sometimes dealing with "failure" (I use that term loosely here) is a good thing.