Parents Update on DD's BHS and Other Thoughts

[Ariekannairb]

I posted a few weeks back about my DD having trouble undercutting her back handspring. We chose to go to private lessons with a personal friend who happened to work at our gym previously. In 3 lessons he corrected the problem that the gym hasn't been able to correct in 6 months. It isn't perfect and she is really having to work out some fear issues from all of the falling on her head, but she at least no longer does that.

Which brings me to my next thought. I had posted last season that I was thinking about switching gyms because we were having problems with them not correcting form and a few other reasons. So many of you wise parents told me to make the change right then. Well, my stupidity won and now we will be suffering through another season and having to pay extra to kick the bad habits. I did make the decision that this is our last season and we would probably already be gone if I hadn't already committed financially to this gym. I have to admit that as sure as I am about this decision, I am terrified. Because our meet season overlaps with the tryouts for the gym we have chosen we have had to tell the new gym what is going on. DD is also now attending tumbling at the new gym on the "down low" knowing that if the other gym finds out we will likely be dismissed, because unless she finishes correcting her BHS she will be held back or possibly not make the team at all. The whole situation has me angry and on edge and both she and I are counting down until we can move on. States are in May so we are stuck where we are until after that, though honestly, I wouldn't cry for too long if we did have to move over early. Even if it meant not getting to finish the season. This is DD's first year to compete for placement and that is what is keeping us there.

Just to clarify, there are many reasons we are moving on. I have tried to stick it out, hence the reason we are here a second season, and I have tried to talk to the coaches about some of the tumbling issues, but it just isn't going well. There are many other reasons beyond this though that make this move a must. Please be kind to me. I am dealing with the best way I can while trying to help my daughter get her tumbling up to par and making the switch.

 

[txgymfan]

Is the only reason you are staying because you committed financially? What does the new gym say about her staying on team and taking tumbling at the new gym? I'm not criticizing I'm just surprised. I hate the idea of your DD having to take classes on the down low but I understand you are doing the best you can within your situation.

 

[mariposa]

I would just leave now and call it a loss. If your daughter's gym finds out, it could be ugly, especially since she is taking tumbling there. It isn't worth the emotional damage that could be inflicted on your child if she is asked to leave right after getting to practice or in the middle.

 

[Ariekannairb]

Is the only reason you are staying because you committed financially? What does the new gym say about her staying on team and taking tumbling at the new gym? I'm not criticizing I'm just surprised. I hate the idea of your DD having to take classes on the down low but I understand you are doing the best you can within your situation.

Yes and no. I mean we have put a lot of money into this season already. She had to have a new competition leo, a practice leo, the warm ups...you know all the stuff that goes with looking good. Plus we have paid all of our meet fees already and of course the monthly fees. So yes, the financial aspect of it does hurt a little, however, mostly, it is about all of the hard work she has put in and despite having terrible floor scores so far, she has competed decently on her other events and has medaled so is excited about her meet season from her child like "it is fun to be doing well and be recognized for it" point of view. She also has higher aspirations than where she is at so she does understand that the move is best for her in terms of her goals and told me she understands that making the move is the best thing for her goals (She wants to move to the USAG team but our current gym only competes TAAF). But I can't help but be a little heartbroken over the hard work she has put in basically going to waste as far as the meet season goes. This is her first season competing for placement so she is very excited about the prospect of going to states and things like that. As mature as she has been about all of this, I know she would be disappointed if we had to leave early.

The other gym does know about it. We compete with this gym and I figured it safest to go ahead and tell them up front what the issue was. They have been understanding and have not tried to pressure me one way or the other even though they know they are basically training their competition. I would like to think they like her enough to figure it is worth it to have her move over but that is probably just my mom ego talking LOL. I HATE our current situation. HATE IT. I don't like feeling sneaky or dishonest and I don't have any desire to be caught up in any drama it may cause. I am also worried that my daughter is going to be caught up in it. I want to quit the other gym, but I just can't bring myself to feel 100% ok about the money and time invested into this season, but at the same time, I am not sure it is worth sticking around. We have a meet on Saturday and then again next weekend. I think if we decided to move now after that second meet would be ideal as we have a two week gap with the meets.

The other question I have it, obviously if we move mid-season she will have quite a drop in hours at the gym. Since team is billed quite differently than hourly rates I can't really afford to put her in for the same number of hours until she actually makes the team at the new gym. Is this drop in hours going to make a huge difference? I mean even if she isn't being coached well, just the acts of pulling up on the bar and so on work muscles. How do we make sure she can keep up? I swear I am not crazy gym mom. I really know nothing about gymnastics so I just want to do what is best for her within her goals.

 

[motigymnasticsmom]

This is also my DD second year and we are having the same problem. All summer, coach wouldn't let her do bhs. She doesn't even do practice skills with them for tumbling. I think she kind of expects them to just be brave enough to throw the skill. Then, all of a sudden, dd needs privates for bhs. Now, floor scoring has come way down this year because she also undercuts her bhs (she also rebounds too high). Coach should be correcting them during practice.(dd says that she doesn't) I like the coach, she treats them well, but doesn't give her full attention. I am now thinking to change her to the regular jo system.

 

[txgymfan]

To the OP, you are doing the best you can in a difficult situation. You have given this careful thought and consideration. It sounds like you think the best option is to stay the course and be ready to switch to the new gym if things become more difficult at her current. I respect your decision even if I ( and others) would not make the same one. Good luck and Keep us posted.

 

[mariposa]

If you want to finish season, do it, but don't risk having her at both gyms. Search gym changes here. More than one kid has been told to leave mid practice or as they walked in to practice once they found out. They won't be "nice" just because she is a kid. They risk losing more than just one kid, as you could tell other parents, so they aren't going to just let her stay if they find out. It's a slap in the face to their program and they will react to it as such. And since she is young, she could easily slip and say something or they will notice she is getting better and wonder how. They could make a comment about how it is looking better and she could innocently say "Coach Joe is helping me."

Or some kid that trains at new gym and has seen her could come up and say hi at a meet and ask why she is on that team? Or a CGM from your gym or the new gym could find out and spread the news. The gym world is very small. Coaches from your current gym could be friends with coaches and new gym.

If you want her to finish the season, let her finish and wait till season is over to switch to new gym. If you really think they are the better gym, then you will have to trust their assessment and whatever happens after, whether she is ready for their team by their tryouts or not.

Though I have to question the other gym that is encouraging this, too, would they feek the same if one of their team gymnasts was doing the same? You might lose their respect and they could decide your daughter isn't worth the risk of you doing same to them if you decide you don't like their program.

I get the money aspect and her wanting to finish season because of her hard work, but putting her at risk of being treated poorly if they find out (either by being asked to leave OR possibly worse, they could just stop coaching her and ignore her) isn't worth it, IMHO.

 

[Ariekannairb]

Thank you. I am taking everyone's advice into consideration.

 

[gymdog]

This is also my DD second year and we are having the same problem. All summer, coach wouldn't let her do bhs. She doesn't even do practice skills with them for tumbling. I think she kind of expects them to just be brave enough to throw the skill. Then, all of a sudden, dd needs privates for bhs. Now, floor scoring has come way down this year because she also undercuts her bhs (she also rebounds too high). Coach should be correcting them during practice.(dd says that she doesn't) I like the coach, she treats them well, but doesn't give her full attention. I am now thinking to change her to the regular jo system.

If she was not ready in the summer the coach was doing the right thing to wait. There is no way to make them do it, they have to be ready. I have a group that all started the same time, most are doing two and three BHS now with good form but a couple are still not ready and doing very basic drills or just one single standing BHS. I never rush them. One day they tell me they are ready. Then at some point they tell me "I want to do two". I say okay, you will not land on your head? They say "I'M SURE." and beg to do it. Okay, then they do it. If they can do two they can do roundoff BHS. Of course we are always doing very technical work with CWs and roundoffs.

Some kids this whole process takes a very short time, some longer. I just invited a new child recently, I see she is very strong and eager to learn without hesitation, does not jump forward or side when going backwards. One week later she is doing correct BHS by herself. But again some kids who have been working six months still are not doing it. And one of my best gymnasts this year doing all tumbling was that kid last year. Another child broke her arm on BHS last year with another coach, I let her do the process and now she is doing two on her own just one year later.

If I see they do anything other than jump back and over (child jumps forward, sideways, up too high) they are not ready and must do drills and tumbling for coordination and orientation. This will not even look like BHS necessarily. By your explanation of your child's BHS she would not do BHS like this in my class, not yet. But she also will be way less likely to break her arm or dread gymnastics and quit.

 

[Ariekannairb]

If we were to make the decision to go ahead and move now, how should I handle it regarding the new gym? We have obviously let the HC for the rec department know that her goal is team (he refers girls to team after they are evaluated during rec). Should I go ahead and talk to the HC for team as well and let them know what her goals are and ask them the best way to prepare her (which classes they suggest and so on)? I don't want to start off our time there looking like a CGM, but I do want to let them know what DD hopes to achieve so that we can best prepare her.

 

[wallflower]

I'm just confused as to why if she is already on team and competing that she could not go to the new gym and be in that same level. Especially if she is scoring well. If I have a child on team I wouldn't go into a gym and ask for information on recreational classes. Our gym also has team tryouts once a year, but if you are moving from another gym you don't wait for those yearly try-outs. Those are for kids who have never been on team. You go to the gym and say "I have a child who is a level 3 and she would like to join your level 3 team." Then they practice with the team and the coaches look at her. If they think she isn't up to the level of their team they may recommend a lower level or other arrangements, but I wouldn't speak to a rec coach.

 

[Ariekannairb]

I think it is actually a TAAF rule? I could be wrong. We are under the assumption that should would have to forfeit this season though and would probably opt to anyways as it would be very stressful and awkward to run into our old gym at the meets this season. I wouldn't want to invite that drama.

 

[Ariekannairb]

A gymnast may compete for only one T.A.A.F.
gymnastics club/team per season. If they
switch gyms, they will become ineligible i
mmediately. (Exception: Documented parents
job transfer after having competed in a regul
ar season T.A.A.F. meet and family moves
outside the original Region of participation

Found this in TAAF's rules.

 

[txgymfan]

Perhaps she could train with the team and start actually competing with the JO team next year. One CB gymnast is doing that this year.

 

[Ariekannairb]

Perhaps she could train with the team and start actually competing with the JO team next year. One CB gymnast is doing that this year.

I am going to ask about this. Ideally, this would be what we do.

 

[motigymnasticsmom]

If she was not ready in the summer the coach was doing the right thing to wait. There is no way to make them do it, they have to be ready. I have a group that all started the same time, most are doing two and three BHS now with good form but a couple are still not ready and doing very basic drills or just one single standing BHS. I never rush them. One day they tell me they are ready. Then at some point they tell me "I want to do two". I say okay, you will not land on your head? They say "I'M SURE." and beg to do it. Okay, then they do it. If they can do two they can do roundoff BHS. Of course we are always doing very technical work with CWs and roundoffs.

Some kids this whole process takes a very short time, some longer. I just invited a new child recently, I see she is very strong and eager to learn without hesitation, does not jump forward or side when going backwards. One week later she is doing correct BHS by herself. But again some kids who have been working six months still are not doing it. And one of my best gymnasts this year doing all tumbling was that kid last year. Another child broke her arm on BHS last year with another coach, I let her do the process and now she is doing two on her own just one year later.

If I see they do anything other than jump back and over (child jumps forward, sideways, up too high) they are not ready and must do drills and tumbling for coordination and orientation. This will not even look like BHS necessarily. By your explanation of your child's BHS she would not do BHS like this in my class, not yet. But she also will be way less likely to break her arm or dread gymnastics and quit.

CoachP
My dd did beg in the summer, she said they never did drills for bhs, none of the girls. All the coach would tell her that she's not ready. Actually, this attitude from the coach left my dd with a confidence problem over the summer. It made her think that she couldn't do anything. At one point she was begging me to transfer her to the new jo coach. Last year, my dd begged to learn bhs, and coach would say, oh, your rebound from ro isn't high enough. One day, in October, I go in and all the girls are doing bhs, except for mine. All of a sudden, all of the other girls have had privates for bhs. My dd was doing them all along at home on the tramp. I know that she may not be doing them perfect, I even explained to her that she may have trouble on floor. She loves gymnastics so much, she wants to learn everything fast! ( She's doing tucks and layouts already on the tramp at home.)I don't want to come off as a cgm, but my dd is on the older side(11) and has already been held back because of another coach. I don't want her to fly through levels, but I don't want her held back any more either. I think spending good time at basics is good for a good strong base, because everything else is built upon basics.

 

[sevenatenine2]

1. I wouldn't move her until I was sure she would be invited to the USAG team. I know some gyms look down upon TAAF a bit and their TAAF kids are at a different caliber than their USAG kids. I wouldn't move her unless I was either sure she would make their USAG team OR their TAAF team, if that's what you're looking for. It would be tragic to move her, burn your bridges, and then find out that the new gym has already decided she's a not "team quality" and never had any intention of moving her to their team. That is not a dig at your daughter, but some gyms are super picky about who they allow on their teams and they like to be the ones doing the picking. If you move her, do it with the understanding she would go straight to the level 3 team. USAG season is in the fall, so I can't see any reason why she couldn't move, train, and then compete Level 3 (again) in the fall. There is plenty of time. Still, get that checked out before you burn your bridges!

Best of luck!

 

[Kcanflip]

From what I have seen with my DD who is a l3 there are so many little things in compulsaries! Things as simple as being on high toe on beam turns, general body tightness, foot turned out instead of straight on floor, flow of the routine and pauses, slowing down before hitting the vault springboard, etc...seems like our coaches work the biggest issues first and gradually work towards the little things so as to not overwhelm the kiddos and to let them get the big corrections down pat first. My DD is solid with her floor skills but gets killed in scores on these little things that some other kids just do naturally...like toe point and dance elements!

 

[Kcanflip]

Oops...my response above was supposed to be on the level 3 scoring topic. Sorry folks! Not sure if can be moved or deleted?

 

[gymdog]

I guess I'm still confused about the situation. Are these gyms your only two options? Does the new gym offer USAG Xcel? I don't understand why your daughter would go to rec. What are her skills? How many pull-ups and leg lifts can she do?