What to do with my DS (preschool gymmie)?

[mamaoftwo]

We're in a little bit of a dilemma and I've begun to overthink this, so I hope someone here can set me straight. Sorry as I fear this will be a bit long.

DD is a preteamer at our gym. It's close to home, fairly competitive for the girls, and after some debate with DD's coach, we've "decided to stay there" for a good bit as long as things stay consistent. She's 7 now and started tot classes 3 years ago. DD is comfortable there and loves her teammates, she's been with the same group for a year now.

Now, DS has pretty much grown up in the gym. He was 15 months old when DD started classes, and up until now I've been a "watcher", so he's pretty comfortable there. I made him wait until he was 3 to start classes so he could be on his own (I thought the mom & me would be a disaster with him). He was very excited to start, but pretty much freaked out his first few classes. After 3-4 weeks, he bonded well to his instructor and all has pretty much gone well since - he has even bonded with a second instructor pretty well, too.

It's now been about a year and a half since he started, and he'll be 4.5 in August. He is clearly very comfortable in his class, and often nearly "laps" the new kids in his class. He's quick and bouncy, and loves to be there ... but he clearly needs a bit of a challenge, or to be with kids not so new to gymnastics. Without a challenge, he's the kid who'll run off an bounce on the tramp a couple of times while waiting for the kids in front of him to finish their station. He also has asked me a couple to times to "be with the boys", but at our gym the boys-only classes don't start til age 5, due to low enrollment and recommendations by USAG (at that age they begin all the "donts" for kids under 5).

I have a couple of options. When I kindly asked his coach if he had a recommendation, he said that perhaps in the fall we could basically lie about DS's age on our reg form and put him in the older class. He said he's been there "long enough" and would probably be ok in it. I do have concerns about the fact that DS clearly loves his tot coaches (and will lose them), is liking having "fun" in the tot classes, has some difficulty staying on task, and of course I don't really want him doing skills/stretches that he shouldn't be doing yet. He'd start the class at age 4 and 7 months.

Another option is to switch gyms. A couple of gyms further away have "boys only" progressive classes starting at age 4 that are more "regulation" friendly as it seems. A negative is we love the coaches now, and his 2nd fave rec coach does help coach the boys teams, should DS go that route.

A plus to switching is that if DS DOES stick with it, our gym is not competitive for boys, and currently only have boys in the lower levels (I think 4 and 5? MAYBE 6?).

Otherwise, I could try "one of each" for the fall and see what we prefer. Not sure how great I'd feel about that, though.

My gut says have him stick at current gym at the tot level til he's 5, but he truly is seeming more and more "bored" with each class, but he's at the max level for his age. And we have never discussed an option of preteam or anything - but not sure that his focus is there anyway - or even if we have a functional pre-team for boys.

As an aside, it's hard for me personally, as these two coaches that DS loves were also loved by my DD - they were her coaches for a long time, too. They've been a part of our lives for a good 2.5 years now. Both these guys have become nearly family to us!

Thanks for reading if you've made it this far!

 

[Deleted member D3987]

We're in a little bit of a dilemma and I've begun to overthink this, so I hope someone here can set me straight. Sorry as I fear this will be a bit long.

DD is a preteamer at our gym. It's close to home, fairly competitive for the girls, and after some debate with DD's coach, we've "decided to stay there" for a good bit as long as things stay consistent. She's 7 now and started tot classes 3 years ago. DD is comfortable there and loves her teammates, she's been with the same group for a year now.

Now, DS has pretty much grown up in the gym. He was 15 months old when DD started classes, and up until now I've been a "watcher", so he's pretty comfortable there. I made him wait until he was 3 to start classes so he could be on his own (I thought the mom & me would be a disaster with him). He was very excited to start, but pretty much freaked out his first few classes. After 3-4 weeks, he bonded well to his instructor and all has pretty much gone well since - he has even bonded with a second instructor pretty well, too.

It's now been about a year and a half since he started, and he'll be 4.5 in August. He is clearly very comfortable in his class, and often nearly "laps" the new kids in his class. He's quick and bouncy, and loves to be there ... but he clearly needs a bit of a challenge, or to be with kids not so new to gymnastics. Without a challenge, he's the kid who'll run off an bounce on the tramp a couple of times while waiting for the kids in front of him to finish their station. He also has asked me a couple to times to "be with the boys", but at our gym the boys-only classes don't start til age 5, due to low enrollment and recommendations by USAG (at that age they begin all the "donts" for kids under 5).

I have a couple of options. When I kindly asked his coach if he had a recommendation, he said that perhaps in the fall we could basically lie about DS's age on our reg form and put him in the older class. He said he's been there "long enough" and would probably be ok in it. I do have concerns about the fact that DS clearly loves his tot coaches (and will lose them), is liking having "fun" in the tot classes, has some difficulty staying on task, and of course I don't really want him doing skills/stretches that he shouldn't be doing yet. He'd start the class at age 4 and 7 months.

Another option is to switch gyms. A couple of gyms further away have "boys only" progressive classes starting at age 4 that are more "regulation" friendly as it seems. A negative is we love the coaches now, and his 2nd fave rec coach does help coach the boys teams, should DS go that route.

A plus to switching is that if DS DOES stick with it, our gym is not competitive for boys, and currently only have boys in the lower levels (I think 4 and 5? MAYBE 6?).

Otherwise, I could try "one of each" for the fall and see what we prefer. Not sure how great I'd feel about that, though.

My gut says have him stick at current gym at the tot level til he's 5, but he truly is seeming more and more "bored" with each class, but he's at the max level for his age. And we have never discussed an option of preteam or anything - but not sure that his focus is there anyway - or even if we have a functional pre-team for boys.

As an aside, it's hard for me personally, as these two coaches that DS loves were also loved by my DD - they were her coaches for a long time, too. They've been a part of our lives for a good 2.5 years now. Both these guys have become nearly family to us!

Thanks for reading if you've made it this far!

1. 1st bold: what are you referring to?

2. 2nd bold: what?? lie about what and for what reason?? please explain further.

 

[mamaoftwo]

I am not entirely certain what I mean - it's what I was told. BUT I assumed it meant they do headstands, bridge (do boys bridge?), etc. in the older class. I'd be moving DS up early to the 5+ boys class at the age of 4 years and 7 mos. But, as a rule, they don't permit kids in the 5+ classes until they are at minimum 5 years old, and I'd have to fudge his birthdate on the session form for the fall. While his "real d.o.b." is in the system somewhere, they apparently don't cross-reference each session's forms with their records - they take our word for it. This is per his coach (who is the tot program director and also assists with boys team).

 

[10.0]

Why would you have to lie? Talk to the owner, explain just as you did here. They often make exceptions and do so without having to be seedy.

 

[mamaoftwo]

That's where it gets a little convoluted. The owner is often not in the gym. There is a very good reason for it, which is not public, and I should not know myself (and wish I did not know). So, the coach that is the tot program director in this case is the correct person to contact. So, while I am "lying", I have permission to, kind of? I guess my worry was whether at that age he should be actually doing the things he'll learn, as there's a reason that 5 is the cutoff?

See, it's sort of a mess at the moment, and I'd be lying if I said I don't worry just a bit about the future. The owner's (completely understandable) current lack of involvement, the lack of communication from the "team side" of things, among other things, has made me consider leaving before, but we'd like to stick it out a bit ... at least for DD.

 

[10.0]

Sounds complicated! To answer your question about "having" to be 5 to do some skills, while it is the recomended age to do bridges it varies based on the child, some children are especially strong and can handle the skill. The worry is more about not being able to support the weight on the arms and instead supporting it on the neck. The reason 5 is before then most children's heads are larger in portion to their bodies.

Anyways that said a good coach will realize when a child is advancing and getting bored and will be able to alter or introduce some new skills in any recreational class IMO. In example one child may work handstands while another may start working handstand forward rolls.

Also if this coach is in charge I don't understand why they are asking you to lie, he or she should place your son in the correct class regardless and if they feel he could be in the 5+ class make an exception without asking you to compromise yourself by lying. I hope you can sort it out and that everything works out for you.

 

[cher062]

I'd just stay at the gym your at. there is no guarentee your son will make a boys team so don't worry about that until you need to. going to L6 in boys team is more challenging than girls team I've had a son on boys team and I know the jumps in skills are alot bigger than in the girls program.

I am not aware of an age requirement from USAG regarding any rec classes at all but I'm sure someone who knows the rules better than I do will post it. Usually most gyms I've seen have age guidelines they impose but will move kids or recommend classes based on ability once they get to know the kids. My DD was always in a group where the kids were at least a year or tow older than she was with the exception of when she started in Mom and me.

Just talk to the owner and coaches and explain just like you did here- I'm sure they will let him move up at 4 1/2 if he is a good listener especially. Not alot of difference in those ages. Getting new coaches at gym from one level of rec class or team level is all part of life just like getting a new teacher at school every year - the kids adjust and have a new favorite coach in a very short time.

Your other choice as it seems from your post you might be considering moving gyms for your DD is to look around for one that meets both their needs. and give them a try for a week and see how it goes. You might find a new gym or decide to stay where you are.

Good luck and let us know what the final results are.

 

[mayestra12]

I would stay too. If you feel comfortable with him being in the 5 year old class and they will let him in it without lying about his date of birth, go for it.

It ds wants to be competitive later on then that's when I'd go gym shopping if there is not a strong boys team. It sounds like you may need to move later on if things are not stable at the current gym in which case you can find a gym that fits both kids.

My ds totally loves gymnastics but his first rec class was a disaster. He's learned from parent's night out that he can run around the gym like a maniac and that's exactly what he did in class. I pulled him out and will try again next year when he is 4.

 

[Kiwi]

I agree with 10.0's reply. The coaches should be able to introduce some extra challenges for him in his current class, and it is only a few more months until he is 5. If the coaches think he should be in the more advanced class now, then they should be able to find out if they can move him there early, without anyone having to resort to lying.

 

[emorymom]

My son quit gym at 3.5ish, and asked to go back at 4.5. Pre-team programs near me started at age 5. However a power tumbling team was glad to have him at his skill level. Now all he did in his 9 months there was conditioning, stretching, and things like one-armed cartwheels and progressions to RO-BHS but all with high form requirements. And they worked out 3.5/week so it was a good amount of training but not too much for a talented 4yo.

I would have left him there but as he approached his 5th birthday my husband was hit by a car biking to work and leaving home to go to practice 45 minutes away wasn't working any more and I decided he needed to move closer to home. All that was closer to home was MAG but now he was nearly at his 5th birthday so he could go on pre-team.

And maybe it was a premonition because the month after we moved him closer to home, DH ended up in an unexpected surgery to drain a blood clot and couldn't drive for quite a while. The tumbling team would have been out of the question with him unable to drive.