Parents Abrupt end of her season...

[AYEMama]

I got that terrifying phone call yesterday... "You need to come, quick".
I got there within seconds and was riding in an ambulance with her moments after.
It was pretty much a freak accident, falling arm first (like diving) from the high bar.
Not doing upgrades, not doing anything out of the ordinary.
Her arm did not look ok. It looked horrific. I know it could've been so much worse... but I can't think about that right now.
They realigned and stabilized it for now, but won't know the extent of her injuries until our ortho appointment.

She's competing level 7 and has gotten 38 AA at every meet. Highest so far was 38.70.
Her goal was to get to 39 and make it onto the State Team.
I am devastated for her. It was heartbreaking to see her in so much pain.

I've been keeping it together to stay strong in front of her, but I'm crumbling inside.
Parents with gymnasts that have gone through major injuries, please tell me how you got through it, any encouraging words, any thoughts.... anything.
Please, I just need some support right now. I am crushed for her and feel helpless.

 

[JBS]

Please, I just need some support right now. I am crushed for her and feel helpless.

I watched my son shred his elbow on rings at a meet this season... it was not good.

Injuries are a normal thing in sports... most make it through them just fine... stay positive.

As a parent... I feel like you... as a coach... I know I have a job to do to help get him back up and running. That started with getting him the best medical attention (including PT). As time goes on I will help him build his body back up to full strength so he is ready for gymnastics again. This could be by me helping him with his strength and conditioning... or by sending him to a third party strength and conditioning facility.

Overall...

 

[AYEMama]

I watched my son shred his elbow on rings at a meet this season... it was not good.

Injuries are a normal thing in sports... most make it through them just fine... stay positive.

As a parent... I feel like you... as a coach... I know I have a job to do to help get him back up and running. That started with getting him the best medical attention (including PT). As time goes on I will help him build his body back up to full strength so he is ready for gymnastics again. This could be by me helping him with his strength and conditioning... or by sending him to a third party strength and conditioning facility.

Overall...

View attachment 8598

Thank you for your reply. Yes, you're right. We will focus on the solution.
We wanted to be seen by a specialist of our choice today, but no availability until tomorrow. The advice we got was to see the best doctor we can, and not to compromise that just because we are impatient. Hopefully, coming up with an action plan will put us at ease... and we can focus on the solution.
Thank you.

 

[gymgal]

Very sorry that you are going through this and virtual hugs coming your way. That phone call is heart wrenching and then what comes after it is head spinning... my dd sustained a major knee injury just after her first L10 season, 9th grade, pretty much the summer/fall that recruiting would have been ramping up for her. It was tough on all of us, but of course worst for her. There were a lot of tears and "what now"s. Several days of not knowing what the injury meant for general recovery and also gymnastics. Lots of googling - I would advise against this at least until you have seen the ortho as I read a lot of worst case scenarios which fortunately was not dd's. The first few days while we were waiting on the ortho appt was the worst part, honestly, because we didn't have any answers including whether she would need surgery. I encouraged my dd to talk through her emotions. Once we had the appt and a better idea of recovery, things settled down for us all. Having a plan really helped refocus the attention from the grieving phase to active recovery.

things that helped us: ( focusing on her will help you through this trauma as well)
- encouraging talking about fears of the future (am I going to get better, will I get to go back to gymnastics) and the loss she feels for this season but also discuss future possibilities of making it to the top again.
- discussing a reasonable timelines - Mine was able to compete partially the following season but It took her about a year to get back to full competition mode and even longer for a few skills.
- getting back into the gym even if she cannot do anything. Mine went back after the first week and mostly did rehab for a couple hours per day but she remained involved in the team atmosphere
- finding other activities to fill the time -art, reading, cooking
- get a good PT, particularly one who has worked with gymnasts

hang in there and please keep us updated

 

[AYEMama]

Very sorry that you are going through this and virtual hugs coming your way. That phone call is heart wrenching and then what comes after it is head spinning... my dd sustained a major knee injury just after her first L10 season, 9th grade, pretty much the summer/fall that recruiting would have been ramping up for her. It was tough on all of us, but of course worst for her. There were a lot of tears and "what now"s. Several days of not knowing what the injury meant for general recovery and also gymnastics. Lots of googling - I would advise against this at least until you have seen the ortho as I read a lot of worst case scenarios which fortunately was not dd's. The first few days while we were waiting on the ortho appt was the worst part, honestly, because we didn't have any answers including whether she would need surgery. I encouraged my dd to talk through her emotions. Once we had the appt and a better idea of recovery, things settled down for us all. Having a plan really helped refocus the attention from the grieving phase to active recovery.

things that helped us: ( focusing on her will help you through this trauma as well)
- encouraging talking about fears of the future (am I going to get better, will I get to go back to gymnastics) and the loss she feels for this season but also discuss future possibilities of making it to the top again.
- discussing a reasonable timelines - Mine was able to compete partially the following season but It took her about a year to get back to full competition mode and even longer for a few skills.
- getting back into the gym even if she cannot do anything. Mine went back after the first week and mostly did rehab for a couple hours per day but she remained involved in the team atmosphere
- finding other activities to fill the time -art, reading, cooking
- get a good PT, particularly one who has worked with gymnasts

hang in there and please keep us updated

This waiting period is really hard, like you said. I liked "refocus the attention from the grieving phase to active recovery". It also lets us know that this grieving period is part of it and it's ok.

Thanks for list of things - they are all very actionable, which will help with the process.


I appreciate these responses. They're totally different from our real life non-gym friends. I really needed to hear these things from parents who understand. Thank you.

 

[gym_dad32608]

I'm so sorry. Its probably the worst to go through with this sport. Mine has had 2 "calls from the gym". They are never never never fun. Hang in there. Just focus on what is in front of you. She is young and will recover just fine. Every day will get a little better. I would hold off a bit on talking about fears and the future, at least until you get a full medical consult and treatment plan. Even then, just focus on what's in front of you, need to get consult appt, scheduled surgery, rehab, etc. Every child is different, I know mine had some significant injuries and never had any issues with fears or worries, she was just anxious to get back to the gym. So just take it one step at a time.

Sending plenty of positive vibes and thoughts. It will get better!

 

[AYEMama]

I'm so sorry. Its probably the worst to go through with this sport. Mine has had 2 "calls from the gym". They are never never never fun. Hang in there. Just focus on what is in front of you. She is young and will recover just fine. Every day will get a little better. I would hold off a bit on talking about fears and the future, at least until you get a full medical consult and treatment plan. Even then, just focus on what's in front of you, need to get consult appt, scheduled surgery, rehab, etc. Every child is different, I know mine had some significant injuries and never had any issues with fears or worries, she was just anxious to get back to the gym. So just take it one step at a time.

Sending plenty of positive vibes and thoughts. It will get better!

You're right, every child is different. She was scared and talked a lot (about the present situation and about the future) while we were in the ER yesterday(and her pain level was still really high), so I just listened. After they realigned, she was in less pain and sounded more optimistic, so I let her go with that and is still like that today currently. I'm taking my cues off of her. I, however, am not handling it well today, and keep finding myself go somewhere to just cry.

Thank you for the positive vibes. I'm sorry you've had 2 of those terrible calls. I don't wish this feeling on anyone.

 

[RTT2]

Sorry to hear this, and I hope you get a clear path forward and she heals quickly!

 

[AYEMama]

Sorry to hear this, and I hope you get a clear path forward and she heals quickly!

Thank you. Yes, a clear path and some direction would help us move forward. <3

 

[JBS]

They realigned and stabilized it for now, but won't know the extent of her injuries until our ortho appointment.

This time period sucks.

My son did his elbow at an away meet. The ortho that we went to was great... but they just splinted it and we had to wait several days until we saw our home ortho. Then after that... we had to get a special MRI as they wanted his arm fully extended away from the body and their MRI was too small. It ended up being like 10 days before we knew anything... once we did... it was only a few days until surgery and the road to recovery.

 

[AYEMama]

This time period sucks.

My son did his elbow at an away meet. The ortho that we went to was great... but they just splinted it and we had to wait several days until we saw our home ortho. Then after that... we had to get a special MRI as they wanted his arm fully extended away from the body and their MRI was too small. It ended up being like 10 days before we knew anything... once we did... it was only a few days until surgery and the road to recovery

Ok actually this is good to know so that we're not expecting anything. It'll be helpful to keep us patient and calm. Thanks.

 

[GymnastMomX2]

I’m so sorry, the worst is not knowing the full extent of the injury and timeline and plan to come back.

 

[mom2newgymnast]

So sorry. I agree that the uncertainty is the worst. I hope that her recovery is smooth and speedy.

 

[AYEMama]

I’m so sorry, the worst is not knowing the full extent of the injury and timeline and plan to come back.

So sorry. I agree that the uncertainty is the worst. I hope that her recovery is smooth and speedy.

Thank you both. We are anxious, but our appointment is now only about 12 hours away, so while we probably know 100% what's going on or what's going to happen, it'll be one step closer. My emotions are still up and down and I feel like a I'm in a haze, but it might be because I only got 1 hour of sleep and no food for over 24 hours. I have to remember to take care of myself so that I can take care of her...

 

[JessSyd]

I am so sorry this happened. It hurts so much to see our kids hurting. Especially when the pain is emotional as well as physical. Hang in there, have something to eat, and I hope you have some answers and a path forward soon.

 

[Madden3]

I have yet to experience any adverse experience with my kids that did not deepen our relationship and teach me something about them, and myself. In other words, there is good to be found in almost any experience. The way I got through my kids serious injuries- one of which took one son out of gymnastics forever- was to remain hopeful about the future, but focused on the present, while maintaining as much clarity as possible about what I or my child had control over, and what we did not.

 

[NutterButter]

Hey @AYEMama -- thinking about you and your DD today. Let us know how her appt went. I'm sorry this happened to her and I hope you can get a clear path of recovery/rehabilitation.

 

[cmg]

Thank you for your reply. Yes, you're right. We will focus on the solution.
We wanted to be seen by a specialist of our choice today, but no availability until tomorrow. The advice we got was to see the best doctor we can, and not to compromise that just because we are impatient. Hopefully, coming up with an action plan will put us at ease... and we can focus on the solution.
Thank you.

Absolutely this... My daughter had a serious ankle injury and in hindsight we did not have the best doctor, and it took two years to recover. Please take your time to find the right doctor. One of my biggest regrets as a parent is not going to the emergency room right away. My daughter has a very high pain tolerance, (I think a lot of gymnasts have high pain tolerance) so we waited to go to her usual pediatric doctor, when she really needed an ankle specialist. It has been torture seeing her take so long to come back and yes, she did too much too soon due the soft tissue issues. So, my advice is finding the best doctor, and come back slowly because otherwise it can take twice as long to finally heal. It took our third doctor to finally find a solution. She is competing now, so but it took a lot of perseverance to get where she is now. Good luck and I agree that the hardest thing for any parent, but especially for moms, is to watch your child suffer. Try to do your grieving in private. Please emphasize that if she comes back too soon, she will just be delaying the actual healing process so please take it slow.

 

[gym_dad32608]

Hey @AYEMama -- thinking about you and your DD today. Let us know how her appt went. I'm sorry this happened to her and I hope you can get a clear path of recovery/rehabilitation.

Ditto on that!

 

[TheXcelMom]

Gymnastics has equipped her to deal with physical adversity and push through. We're all pulling for her recovery and thinking of you guys.