Parents coach announcing to team that some might be kicked off?

[SHELOVESGYM]

DD (9) is training level 4. Her gym has a very small team program and she is in a mixed level training group of which DD and one other girl are the only ones who competed level 3 last season -the rest are all higher levels. The gym has never had high standards for competition -does not win medals often, the girls don't score high, etc. Recently one of the coaches announced to the group that some of the girls might be kicked off if they are falling behind. Of course DD and her level 3 teammate are the weakest in the group, and this has DD completely paranoid that she is going to be kicked off the team. I don't know why the coach said this and if it's true or not -seems very strange and also a mean thing to say to young kids if it's not true. Has anyone seen kids kicked off team for this reason? Has anyone heard of a coach saying this?

 

[sce]

Seems really mean. But could she have misunderstood what was being said. Not that I am making excuses for the coach, I just know many a situation has been not exactly as the child reported.

Regardless, it could be good to follow-up with the coach. Ask how she is doing and bring up that she is now feeling scared.

 

[Seeker]

Yeah....I'd follow up. Maybe a misunderstanding of what was said or maybe coach was frustrated with lack of focus or something. But still -- I'd want to know what the plan was. It also may be a good time to explore what else might be available in your area. If she's a L3 now, she could more easily transition into another program now rather than older/higher level.

 

[Deleted member 14190]

happens

 

[NutterButter]

My experience with these kinds of blanket statements made to a group is that it only applies to a small few and the ones who stress and take it to heart are the ones who don't need to worry.

I would not be happy with a message like that coming from my kid and would seek out clarification from the coach. If there was an issue, either behavior, work ethic or just falling behind, I would expect an email/phone call/conference with the coach.

 

[MILgymFAM]

I would be direct and ask the coach. It has happened to my DD twice before and when I asked the coach I was told directly that the statement was correct. Both times the coaches indicated it was directed at my DD, and both times it had nothing to do with attitude or work ethic. There is no downside to getting the info right from the horse's mouth, so to speak. Even if it was said as your DD received it, it is better to know where you stand. If it was a misunderstanding it's better to nip that in the bud. Long term, if it was said and meant, I wouldn't expect a great path for your DD at this gym. Laboring under the threat of being cut was a minefield for my DD, and I sense it rarely ends well for anyone.