Anon Coach hit daughter

[gymgal]

Why does the way my daughter was slapped matter? Why does it matter if she was falling or performing an exercise? Why does it matter is there were words exchanged?

I think what they are getting at is that maybe you misinterpretted what looked like a slap when the coach might have been trying to catch the gymnast or it possibly was a playful tap. Yes, there are times when what a parent sees from a distance is taken out of context. I (nor anyone else who has posted here, except the "moderate view" anonymous poster) do not this this is the case. I am pretty sure that if you had any doubt in your mind you would have expressed that here and the fact that other parents reacted the same exact way, to the point of pulling their daughters as well tells me you all did not misinterpret this.

 

[Anonymous Post]

Good god, read the posts, you are mixing two different positions with one. The first position is the actual event and the parent posting. No one is saying the parent should wait or not say anything or that they are crazy, absolutely no one. The other is regarding the general response from the community of posters here. Merely pointing out the fact that only the parent and whatever witnesses were there and their versions of the story know what actually happened. Merely suggesting that because of this, the general community of posters should be cautious in their rush to judgment. This is somehow mixed together with saying the parent shouldn't do anything and the coach in this specific allegation should be protected. NO. I am amazed at how this is received in this community. Can any of the general posters honestly sit there with 100% certainty and say there is no way there could be an alternate version of events? It's a frickin message board people! The response just validates my opinion of why come on a message board to post something like this. The only result is going to be a lot of groupthink and reinforcement of the position of the poster. And god forbid someone suggests we get the whole story. It really is not productive.

Let me be clear, in case anyone is still confused, in regard to the parent, they should immediately pull their child, immediately contact law enforcement, and immediately contact safe sport. The mere allegation of hitting a child merits a swift and decisive response. The rest of us should just chill the heck out. Peace and love and some understanding.

 

[Anonymous Post]

I'm going to try and be the moderate voice here, why come here on a message board to announce this? This is a very serious allegation and while it may be true, it may be false, it may be a misunderstanding. It could be a number of things. I appreciate that you are posting this anonymously so in theory, both parties cannot be harmed by this. But still, let's not all rush to judgment here and sharpen the spikes and light the torches. This is an allegation that should be played out through the proper channels and authorities (safe sport, law enforcement). Only after, and a conviction has been made or the coach banned would I start posting here.

Woahh! Nooooo!
Please please pleaseee don't undermine a situation as serious as this! Put yourself in her shoes:

Close your eyes and imagine yourself watching your gymnast on the bars. Theyre trying to catch that bar, or stick that dismount. One minute theyre up, the next theyre down. Up, down. Up, down. And after that: bam!
Did you just see that? Were they just, slapped??? The look of shock, fear and/or shame on your precious little childs face.

Would you let somebody hit... well, anybody, es pe ci al ly a young child like that? I surely do hope not!

And I can assure you, its not a misunderstanding. And I can tell you. You know, because I was there... But why are we concerned about the coach? Oh, my, the poor, poor coach! He hit a little teenager and, oh no! His little reputation might be ruined! We absolutely have to make sure the coach is 100% alright and fine before we focus on the assaulted children! Is that how we think of this situation?
No!
Didn't hear me?
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Even if my child isn't the center of attention in this situation (although she did tell me that she was assaulted too when I asked her on the way home), I want to know that every single little child who was hit, slapped, pushed, pulled and worse will be alright, including the poster.
So Id take that chance. I am taking the chance. I am and still will sharpen the spikes. I am and still will lightening the torches.
That coach is going to end up calling the police on me.

(to everyone else reading, we've managed to contact each other and the other witnesses and there are actions being taken, much more to come by the end of this week. I know that the poster doesn't feel comfortable sharing who and what and where and how and why etc.)

 

[Anonymous Post]

Honestly, nevermind. I just outright disagree with you. I promise I don't mean to be disrespectful, but at this point I just comprehend the way you would act in a situation like this.
Why does the way my daughter was slapped matter? Why does it matter if she was falling or performing an exercise? Why does it matter is there were words exchanged? What matters is that she was touched by her coach in a way that isn't tolerated in any way! There are an estimated 11 witnesses, and one of them, againsts literally all odds, has even found this post and expressed that they were there too and saw it happen!

And why should I wait?? I'm not just going to stand there and let the situation escalate, with the possibility of my daughter's physical and mental health quickly going downhill. I am going to do something. In fact, I'm going to do everything, and I mean everything that I can do to make sure anything like this never happens again.
I really do hope if you saw your child be hit by a coach that you wouldn't just send them back to class thinking your eyes were playing tricks on you.

Who is gaslighting who? One just outright believes someone who anonymously posts one side of a story on a message board?! Just because the premise of the accusation is horrible, just because the gaslighting around here is, parent says bad thing about coach, one side of story presented, everyone immediately takes story as gospel fact because ya know, all gymnastics coaches/usag are bad. Can you directly answer those questions that I posed?

Geez, this is a personal matter between a parent, a child and a coach and if factual, law enforcement. Everyone else here knows nothing other than what a parent says that they saw. If you want to talk broadly about people who hit children are lower than scum, I am all here for it. If you want to go ahead and convict and send this person to prison, based upon an anonymous statement, then I guess we are living in a banana republic now.

I am so disappointed in your ways of taking in this situation that my frustration can literally not be expressed in words.


Honestly, I know this seems a little crazy, but I have a small hunch that you're the coach... Not jUmPiNg To ConClUsIoNs or anything, just saying :/

 

[Anonymous Post]

I think what they are getting at is that maybe you misinterpretted what looked like a slap when the coach might have been trying to catch the gymnast or it possibly was a playful tap. Yes, there are times when what a parent sees from a distance is taken out of context. I (nor anyone else who has posted here, except the "moderate view" anonymous poster) do not this this is the case. I am pretty sure that if you had any doubt in your mind you would have expressed that here and the fact that other parents reacted the same exact way, to the point of pulling their daughters as well tells me you all did not misinterpret this.

Okay, thanks for helping me understand!

 

[Anonymous Post]

Although I don't agree with this first part,

Good god, read the posts, you are mixing two different positions with one. The first position is the actual event and the parent posting. No one is saying the parent should wait or not say anything or that they are crazy, absolutely no one.

But still, let's not all rush to judgment here and sharpen the spikes and light the torches.

perhaps we should wait.

Let me be clear, in case anyone is still confused, in regard to the parent, they should immediately pull their child, immediately contact law enforcement, and immediately contact safe sport. The mere allegation of hitting a child merits a swift and decisive response. The rest of us should just chill the heck out. Peace and love and some understanding.

I do agree with the last part. Law enforcement and safesport have been contacted unenrolling from the class is still pending, well at least for me and 3 other parents. I hope there's no more.. disagreement..ing? I believe I have lost my english skills.
Anyways, well, yeah.

 

[gymgal]

Let me be clear, in case anyone is still confused, in regard to the parent, they should immediately pull their child, immediately contact law enforcement, and immediately contact safe sport. The mere allegation of hitting a child merits a swift and decisive response. The rest of us should just chill the heck out. Peace and love and some understanding.

For goodness sake! This literally is all any of us were advising the Op. If you took the time to read the replies before first commenting, you would have seen that they were moderate voices of reason - trust what you saw, trust your instincts and alert the authorities. How you think this is an extreme reaction is beyond me.

 

[gymgal]

The point of the post is not to minimize this alleged incident. The point is that collectively, the rest of us should be muted, tempered and neutral in our responses. You know, the whole innocent until proven guilty thing. That is all. An allegation this serious, can and should have serious implications for the alleged party if proven. If false or a misunderstanding, irreparable harm can be made by rushing to judgment. Adjudicating this episode based upon one version of the events behind the keyboard on a message board is a disservice to all. By all means, if this parent believes what they saw they should aggressively pursue all avenues to persecute this individual.

Ok, I'll bite. What exactly should have been the response from all of us? Should we have ignored the post? Should we have told the parent to keep it under wraps or to sleep on it? You keep saying this post can cause irreparable harm but there is no identifying info.

 

[rlm's mom]

I actually pay no attention to anonymous responses like the one above. It’s cowardly.