Parents Coaches not around for awards??

[JessSyd]

I have never seen anything place out to more than sixth here, and my daughter's coaches tend to stay when they can. Sometimes they have to rush off to warm up the next team. Sometimes they have to race off to judge. Even the really little girls understand this.

Far from feeling outraged when the coaches are not present for every moment, I feel a little worried about them, (in a motherly sort of way) when they are. These young people are so dedicated. They would find better paying jobs if they did not love the girls and the sport. Often they are working two jobs yet they are always there when the girls need them. 'Competition season' lasts from March to October as different levels compete at different times. To meet the coaching and judging requirements at competitions, many of the coaches at our gym work seven day weeks week after week.

So no, I am not worried when they cannot be at the awards ceremony. I am more worried that their dedication will lead them to burn out or to miss out on all the other important things in life young people should be doing (like dating!).

 

[M2Abi]

Our coaches always stay for awards, but I certainly understand that there are circumstances that would cause them not to be able to or want to.

 

[momstrong]

I actually do like how our gym handles it (they stay when they can). This seems to be the norm in our area--maybe it isn't in other regions. It just never even occurred to me that coaches wouldn't stay if they weren't coaching the next session or hadn't already been at the meet all day. Our gym makes a big stink when families don't stay for awards, so it just seems odd to me that the same people who send out those nastygrams wouldn't stay themselves. But maybe other gyms are not such sticklers for making the parents and kids stay.

As a brand new level 3 parent of a dd that seems to be behind many of her teammates and isn't on the podium and getting many medals her first few meets I was wondering if it is always required to stay for the awards. She has been handling it okay, but VERY ready to get out of there ASAP as many of her friends are already getting awards in nearly every event. I know it is giving her lots to work towards and improvement will be much more sweet, but it's a rough start.

 

[Deleted member 14190]

Is it customary for the coaches to bail the second competition is over? 4 of our girls placed and our team won 2nd place all around and the coaches left and weren't there to support our girls and congratulate them!!! I'm shocked, pissed and dismayed!!!!

Well.... we try to watch, but sometimes the next session is starting or maybe we were at the meet all day long and are starving. Hard to say. But I usually stick around for awards unless my stomach is making me Hangry.

 

[FlippinLilysMom]

I love the antelope handing out awards idea!! How much would that cost?

We have a moose that hands out awards at our optionals meet (called The Twisted Moose)!!!

 

[SurpriseGymMom]

As a parent, I can honestly say that not even once, ever, have I felt upset with DDs coaches for not being at awards. I know it is very, very rare that they can stay for it because of other sessions etc. once, I was exceedingly grateful that her coach not only stayed (only for the very beginning) but made a big point of talking to DD as she (coach) had just petitioned for DDs scores to be changes 0.025 in order for her to make it to States. That, more than the multitude of award ceremonies missed by her coaches, showed me how much they truly do care about my DD and her progress.
As a coach... I stay when I can. It IS great to see a kid you coach get their spot on the podium. However, like it has been said, I already talked to that kid plenty beforehand, during the meet, and our main interaction is out on that floor. I root for "my" kids when they go and know if they are having a great meet or just skating by, regardless of placement. To me, honestly, it is all about personal success and I don't care whatsoever about what trophy or medal they may possibly get that is dependent on their birthday and how well their same age peers did that day..! I have seen enough competitions to know it means nothing. If your birthday was 3 months earlier/later, you would have ended up second rather than 12th.... happens all the time. Luck of the draw. My DD was young enough her first year competing L7 that she ended up grouped with all the super talented little hot shots (she is NOT) and there was never even a chance that she would end up on the podium. Didn't mean she couldn't or shouldn't celebrate her own successes!
Please do not be upset with the coaches if they cannot attend awards. It is not for us (coaches), and not really even for the gymmies. It is all for the parents.

Oh, and I did want to add... most of the time, us coaches are being paid by the meet, or session. We do NOT get paid more to stay an other hour or two to watch awards.

 

[mommyof1]

As a brand new level 3 parent of a dd that seems to be behind many of her teammates and isn't on the podium and getting many medals her first few meets I was wondering if it is always required to stay for the awards.

It is a requirement at my daughter's gym, which is generally big on teamwork and building character. I agree with the policy for the most part, but there are a few meets where I would choose to leave before awards because it's really late or everyone is starving or the awards are really poorly run. I would ask around among the parents at your gym.

 

[mommyof1]

Please do not be upset with the coaches if they cannot attend awards. It is not for us (coaches), and not really even for the gymmies. It is all for the parents.

I just cannot get behind the idea that awards are for the parents. We know it's all arbitrary! We don't want to be there either! Let's just do away with awards and let everyone go home.

 

[gymnastmom05]

I never thought a lot about this but at least one coach usually stays for awards. Even if another session is stretching/warming up, it doesn't take every coach to be there. Looking back, I appreciate someone being there. I understand when circumstances prevent them from attending but as much as our kids compete for themselves, they also strive to do things for their coaches as well. They spend so much time with them and I think when their coach is there to see their accomplishment, it just feels good. Even if the coach knows if they were in a different age group, they might have placed differently. Heck, I know this as a parent (and typically my kid is on the short end of this as she is on the younger end typically) and yet I am so happy for my daughter or other teammates when they get some acknowledgment for their hard work. Even if it means they were lucky, those girls work their tails off balancing gymnastics, school work and social lives (we're just getting into the social aspect). Plus I do think coaches are helpful especially with the younger kids to corral them up to get their awards. As much as it should be the volunteers, some of the younger sessions are like herding cats and any extra hand is helpful - and in turn run a little faster so we can all get out of there and eat! Our team rules say we must attend awards and stay for the entire thing (in all our years my family has only left once and I felt rude but an ice storm was beginning and our safety trumped the rules for me). While I guess our coach/es might not have to attend, now I'm grateful at least one seems to make it a point to be there.

 

[Deleted member 18037]

I never thought a lot about this but at least one coach usually stays for awards. Even if another session is stretching/warming up, it doesn't take every coach to be there.

Again, every gym doesn't have spare coaches hanging around to coach medals.

Some meets we only have one coach. Yes the must on the floor with the kids competing. That is required. Being at medals is not .

 

[Deleted member 18037]

I just cannot get behind the idea that awards are for the parents. We know it's all arbitrary! We don't want to be there either! Let's just do away with awards and let everyone go home.

Of course it is. Medals are revenue. Parents write the checks.

That is why they go out so many places and have so many ages groups.

To many parents, medals are results. If they're paying they want something to show for it. Bragging rights.

 

[Flyaway]

Again, every gym doesn't have spare coaches hanging around to coach medals.

Some meets we only have one coach. Yes the must on the floor with the kids competing. That is required. Being at medals is not .

Yeah, same for our gym. If we have two it's because our team got split into two different flights.

 

[Gymmommy71]

I just cannot get behind the idea that awards are for the parents. We know it's all arbitrary! We don't want to be there either! Let's just do away with awards and let everyone go home.

I agree they are not for parents. Statements like that show the typical "parent hate" culture of gymnastics - you know, that attitude that all gym parents are crazy competitive and all we want out of this sport is to see little Suzie w/ get more medals than Sally...and related to this thread we want to force the coaches to be there against their will and watch it so they know just how much better our Suzie is than everyone else and can adjust their training plans for her accordingly.

That is not what happens. I think many kids under the age of 13-14 like awards...and see it as a sign of support when their coach is there. The kids see it as a fun time to sit w/ their team and reflect on what happened at the meet and how they did.

 

[B&M's mom]

Every kid is different. My girls could have cared less whether their coaches were there or not. They sat up front on the floor with their teammates, giggling and talking. The coaches, when they could be there, would stand in the back. I doubt that many coaches want to sit on the floor with the kids. The kids never focused on their coaches or for that matter, their parents regardless of age. It was all about the fun! Even when they won team banners/trophies, the pictures were the girls, not the coaches.

 

[Deleted member 18037]

Every kid is different. My girls could have cared less whether their coaches were there or not. They sat up front on the floor with their teammates, giggling and talking. The coaches, when they could be there, would stand in the back. I doubt that many coaches want to sit on the floor with the kids. The kids never focused on their coaches or for that matter, their parents regardless of age. It was all about the fun! Even when they won team banners/trophies, the pictures were the girls, not the coaches.

This. Awards is the time for the gummies to decompress and be together. They are no longer competing against each other. It's together and fun time. They could give a hoot if the coaches are there.

 

[momstrong]

Of course it is. Medals are revenue. Parents write the checks.

That is why they go out so many places and have so many ages groups.

To many parents, medals are results. If they're paying they want something to show for it. Bragging rights.

Ewwww.... the medals part is the ONLY thing I am not liking so far. As a parent, we are in this sport for her development. It is about the practices, the daily development. I guess it will be nice when and if she finally makes it up there. But I'm not sure it will be worth sitting through them all in the meantime and her being upset at the end rather than leaving on a happy note. She enjoys the meet even if she doesn't have the highest score. She DID not enjoy being called to stand up for 11th place AA. WTH is that about??? (Mad emoji) Would be much better to not be called up at all.

 

[skschlag]

Ah, my ds has been called up for last place aa before...2 times. Luckily he was older, and really, just thought it was funny, especially since he did not compete all the events at those meets.

But, he has learned from not getting medals. He has learned that you don't always win...or get a trophy, etc. Definitely has been a good lesson! But I could do without the hours long awards....

 

[mommyof1]

Ewwww.... the medals part is the ONLY thing I am not liking so far. As a parent, we are in this sport for her development. It is about the practices, the daily development. I guess it will be nice when and if she finally makes it up there. But I'm not sure it will be worth sitting through them all in the meantime and her being upset at the end rather than leaving on a happy note. She enjoys the meet even if she doesn't have the highest score. She DID not enjoy being called to stand up for 11th place AA. WTH is that about??? (Mad emoji) Would be much better to not be called up at all.

At my kid's first competition they gave medals to everyone on every event, including kids who had scratched. There were a lot of unhappy faces during that awards ceremony. It was awful. My kid still hates participation medals and meets where they place out all the way.

 

[gymnastmom05]

Again, every gym doesn't have spare coaches hanging around to coach medals.

Some meets we only have one coach. Yes the must on the floor with the kids competing. That is required. Being at medals is not .

Like I also said, there are circumstances which prevent them at times - only one coach and a session starting is exactly one of those times. I was more than anything pointing out that I never thought much about it because our gym/coaches have always made it a point to have one at awards. With the knowledge that not every gym is able for whatever reason, I appreciate the gesture of our coaches, especially when we have the last session of a meet after a very long weekend for them. If our coaches are attending because they're forced, they hide it well because they're usually there, cheering our girls on or lifting up the ones that had a less than stellar day.

 

[LindyHopper]

As a parent, we are in this sport for her development. It is about the practices, the daily development.

I think that this sentiment is held by most of us here. I think it's the healthy outlook. But let's be honest, there are far too many parents in this sport with unhealthy outlooks. For those parents, medals are validation for the money spent.

For the rest of us (like you), the validation comes from watching our gymmie persist through adversity, repeatedly fail and get back up and try again, develop a good work ethic, survive in an environment that demands nearly unattainable perfection, and listen to & apply constructive feedback.