WAG Parent jealousy of a L10 in the gym

[munchkin3]

So we have a small gym. Very good compulsory program, and smaller numbers at the optional level. We have a L10 girl who joined from another gym and she is young and talented. It is the first time i have ever seen this quality of athlete at our gym.

A few bad apple parents (BTW their kids are the least liked on team) are organizing a complaint because this L10 girl takes up more time than their L4 and L5 and they want her out. She uses additional focus from all the coaches, but all the kids are getting coached. Some girls are stagnating because they can't work independently and they don't finish their routines. Then the parents get upset that the coaches are not 'making' their kids work. The L10 girls works very hard and her skills are a distraction, and I imagine it causes jealousy between the girls.

I cant even fathom why parents would take this approach.
Is it usual to have L9 and L10 take some focus away from L4 or L5 skills?
I guess that in most gyms, the really high levels are more 'special'? right?

I feel like we are the most unwelcoming and 'NON team', team in the world!!!

 

[kandkfunk]

I can somewhat relate. We have a small group of parents (we are also a very small team) who seem to complain about everything. Their girls did not live up to their expectations at our last meet and now they are complaining loudly and calling meetings with the coaches. Their kid's performance really has nothing to do with the coaching (other levels scored amazingly well and we've only had our new coaches for less than a year - there was a lot to fix from previous coaching) and more to do with their kid's work ethic. These are the kids who cheat on conditioning, miss a lot of practice, are "hurt" a lot and don't practice real hard. It's not a surprise that their kids aren't scoring as well. I can imagine a similar scenario if a really talented upper level gymnast switched to our gym.

If their plan is to raise a ruckus, I think it will probably back-fire. But, it may not be a pretty process. It's a shame that people cannot use this young lady as motivation for their own children.

Every new kid added to a team puts more pressure on the coaches and a high level optional probably puts a little more than your average level 4 or 5, especially with a small program. If it is a really new situation, the coaches probably just need a little time to figure out the training flow. I would just continue to be positive and kind to the new family. Most likely, they will be the ones who stick around while the troublemakers get to find a new gym.

 

[Deleted member 14190]

Her skills are a distraction? That is actually quite a comical thing for them to say.... Little do they know if but the kids are actually learning off of her... Anyways, sounds pretty normal. Obviously the coaches need to take care of the groups and kids, but an upper level kid needs coaching as well.... Not to mention she is in season... sounds like a bunch of drama coming up, keep us updated.

 

[Gymsanity]

Here is the problem, if the club doesn't have any high level gymnasts of their own, and suddenly a good L10 walks in off the street, it's pretty much like Christmas morning for them and they are going to want to play all day with their new toy! You can't really blame them, but you also can't deny that's not right as far as the other (and more loyal) kids goes. It's not the L10's, or her parents fault. It's up to the coaches to calm down, and remember that they have their 'other' kids that still require their attention and efforts.
Is what the coaches and parents need to do, is make the girl an inspiration, not a distraction! Use her to show everyone what is possible with hard work and dedication, and to aspire to be like her, not tear her down and/or chase her away. If approached properly, it can be a real plus for the gym and everyone involved.
Ps. Wow, my 200th post! Seems like only yesterday I was only 1..........

 

[cbifoja]

those parents are idiots! I would do anything to have that kind of role model for my child.

 

[my4buffaloes]

Are the level 10s there and with the same group as the level 4s and 5s? I can see how the discrepancy in skill level could cause some issues. Ideally though the compulsaries would be separate from the optionals.

Some parents will complain about anything, even good things.

 

[Midwestmommy]

Are compulsory 4s and 5s practicing and sharing coaches at the same time with higher level optionals and this Level 10? We are at what I would consider a small gym, but this would not happen at our gym. Different compulsory levels will sometimes do conditioning together or maybe even a bar or beam rotation, but they would not ever share a coach at the same time with an optional Level 10 (unless it's warms ups/stretching/strength time). Parents are paying for the coaches to provide much needed correction and attention at the lower levels to prep them for later tougher levels. I would not be happy if a coach (that I was paying for) was coaching a Level 10 at the same time as compulsories. That sounds like open gym to me..... Being the devils advocate again today...

 

[raenndrops]

Our NEW high school team practices in the gym overlapping team practice by a 1/2 hour. The high school team has a L10 gymnast on it (mostly a Vault and Floor specialist at L10 and probably only solid L9 bar skills... which is fine since the state HS rules are L8 except Vault... which is L9). Well, OUR team only has thru L7... one soon to be L8, but still needs work on bars. The first time the L10 did 2 giants into an underswing and front tuck 1/2 turn dismount our practice was just getting ready to start... the whole gym got quiet and stopped to stare. The girls LOVE having her as a role model. They will be sad when the HS season is over and she goes back to her gym to finish her season.
For OP... you just keep being you. Be nice. Don't get caught up in the drama.

 

[raenndrops]

Are compulsory 4s and 5s practicing and sharing coaches at the same time with higher level optionals and this Level 10? We are at what I would consider a small gym, but this would not happen at our gym. Different compulsory levels will sometimes do conditioning together or maybe even a bar or beam rotation, but they would not ever share a coach at the same time with an optional Level 10 (unless it's warms ups/stretching/strength time). Parents are paying for the coaches to provide much needed correction and attention at the lower levels to prep them for later tougher levels. I would not be happy if a coach (that I was paying for) was coaching a Level 10 at the same time as compulsories. That sounds like open gym to me..... Being the devils advocate again today...

I don't know about OP's gym, but at my gym, all levels practice at the same time. Different levels on different events with different coaches.... but all there.

 

[Deleted member D3987]

this level 10 child will be an asset to ALL the other kids in their program. and what a way to welcome a child in to their program. geesh...

in this situation, i would sacrifice a couple of bad apples for the good of all in the program. identify them and ask them to leave. period.

 

[htimcj]

In our gym everyone is there at the same time from several sets of compulsories to rec kids to our l9s and l10. All of the younger kids completely look up to those older girls and yes, sometimes it is a distraction when our l10 is working a double arabian or some crazy vault but it is momentary. It sets a great example of what is possible and inspires many kids to be like.... It does help that our older girls are super sweet and good role models in general.

 

[Deleted member D3987]

Are compulsory 4s and 5s practicing and sharing coaches at the same time with higher level optionals and this Level 10? We are at what I would consider a small gym, but this would not happen at our gym. Different compulsory levels will sometimes do conditioning together or maybe even a bar or beam rotation, but they would not ever share a coach at the same time with an optional Level 10 (unless it's warms ups/stretching/strength time). Parents are paying for the coaches to provide much needed correction and attention at the lower levels to prep them for later tougher levels. I would not be happy if a coach (that I was paying for) was coaching a Level 10 at the same time as compulsories. That sounds like open gym to me..... Being the devils advocate again today...

well, i happen to coach ALL of the kids in my program from the time i'm there until i go home. and this includes the boys.

i regret that i have no idea what you mean and have no idea why you wouldn't want a coach of my experience working with your compulsory kid. it's common to find me sliding a mat in on a deltchev and then spotting a group of compulsories on cast handstands and then spotting an elite for a hindorff. i'm paid to teach!

and to clarify the above poster, i need them all training at the same time so that they can see what is possible and how it's done. gymnastics is VISUAL first. instruction 2nd.

 

[LizzieLac]

We have kids at all levels in and out and practicing at the same time. Some coaches "specialize" - for instance, one works excusively with pre-team and level 3s.

However, our HC works with everyone at some point on some event, always has. And the compulsory girls on up see everyone working out and trying to get new skills. They then cheer and shout for each other. The gym might stop to watch a new optional do her full floor routine or giant for the first time or a new level 3 trying her kip.

I might say this camraderie is because we are not a huge team, but I think it is more cultural.

 

[munchkin3]

A few things....L10 is younger than most of the optional girls, so these girls are not looking up to her. They don't understand her.
Even my son (who is on the boys team) says that when she throws her double pike, and face plants, and then cries, it is more of a release of tension than her 'crying'. She just goes and does it again. I bet this is frustrating to L5 girls who are 12 and crying because they cant do the BWO on beam. And they are real drama queens!!!
They train in separate groups, optionals and compulsory but there is some crossover.
plus the gym is small so you are witnessing everything anyway.

I don't know, I just hope they don't run this family out of the gym. This girls is SUCH AN ASSET to our team. I would much rather see the other 2 families leave!
PS. Dunno, Head coach used to do the same thing...he coached EVERYONE!!! for years! We finally have additional GREAT coaches to take some of this burden off. I assume all coaches in the gym will step up to help any kid with a skill. That's how is should be, right??

 

[Gymishome]

**sighs**
1. Higher level gymnasts usually motivate the younger ones. "Did you see what she did?! I wanna do that someday!"
2. The coaches will be ready when/if their kids get to that level. I don't know about you, but if I was in the situation I would want high level, very talented gymnasts so if my dd was there I could see through that she would be safe, and the coaches are capable coaching her when she gets there. (Not saying they're not, just using an example)
3. Way to make the kid feel wanted... It took a lot of time to get where she is, is it that hard to accept her there?
4. Yes, the higher you get the more attention you give them, but it shouldn't (and I'm sure it isn't) neglect any others training at the same time.
Don't worry about it. Tell them to let the coaches do their thing and if it bothers them that much, they can take a hike.

 

[bookworm]

You can't really blame them, but you also can't deny that's not right as far as the other (and more loyal) kids goes.

I find this comment odd...just because someone has been in a gym longer than someone doesn't make them "more loyal" and that's a total dig at kids that aren't there from preschool and unwarranted....Sometimes kids remain in gyms for a long period of time because of location, price , convenience, parent's wishes...but I don't think that it makes them "more loyal" than a Level 10 who seeks out your program for quality coaching...if you give this young L10 a chance, she may end up there a long time as well..

 

[happychaos]

well, i happen to coach ALL of the kids in my program from the time i'm there until i go home. and this includes the boys.

i regret that i have no idea what you mean and have no idea why you wouldn't want a coach of my experience working with your compulsory kid. it's common to find me sliding a mat in on a deltchev and then spotting a group of compulsories on cast handstands and then spotting an elite for a hindorff. i'm paid to teach!

and to clarify the above poster, i need them all training at the same time so that they can see what is possible and how it's done. gymnastics is VISUAL first. instruction 2nd.

I don't think that's what Midwestmommy was saying.....of course compulsory girls would love to have the best coach working with them! It's great that you are able and willing to make your expertise available to all the girls in your gym. I wish our head coaches did more of that. In our gym (very large team) coaches are assigned to their groups, and pretty much stay focused on their group during their assigned time. I wouldn't be happy if the coach assigned to DD's group went away and worked with someone else, at the expense of my DD's group.

Our gym has a ton of 9/10's, and the compulsory girls really look up to them. The coaches expect the older girls to serve as role models.

Wouldn't it be fun for the compulsory girls to go cheer for their L10 at a meet?

 

[purpleleomom]

We have the opposite- one L10 who always seems to be working by herself. It's a small team and they all practice together. The lower levels get most of the attention...I always wonder if the L10 is frustrated.

 

[Lynn]

At our gym, the optional girls come first. They are the main focus by both coaches and owners. Lower levels tend to be forgotten about to some degree.

 

[gymgymgymnast08]

I was hurt for probably more than half of the three years I was in level 9, so a lot of the time I would just do bars. My coach would tell me to go over to bars where a lower level (usually like novice optional or level 7) were on and join them. The one year my usual group was very aggressive, like if you took more than 5 seconds to get on the bar, someone would jump in front of you. We all did it so it wasn't a big deal at all. One time I went over to do bars with the novice optionals and I forget that I'm not in my other group. I kept cutting in front of them if they took too long to go, and they were all too nervous to say anything. Their coach didn't say anything either; I'm not sure why. When I finally realized what I was doing, I felt so bad! Their parents definitely would not have been very happy with me!