WAG Shameless thread time. Optional on the horizon- TMA!

[cbone]

My daughter and her best friend are pushing for Level 6 in a year. Their coach is 100% on-board. That got me excited until I realized: I am really pretty clueless about optionals. Would those who have them throw some pearls of wisdom my way? I'm trying to decrease my learning curve. What are the things you wish someone would have told you?

Thanks in advance!!!

 

[level9mom]

Isn't level usually one year? Guess I'm confused.


Every awful story begins with "we were on beam and..."

 

[level9mom]

Level six


Every awful story begins with "we were on beam and..."

 

[cbone]

No beam- check! Wait...

 

[MeetDirector]

cbone -

As you know by now, I am not afraid of offering "pearls" as you call them. My dd has been an optional now for 4 years, training Lvl 9/10. Here are a few that pop to mind:
1) Open wallet, remove cash. Seriously, the dollars increase exponentially it seems at this level. Tuition, leos, travel, meet fees; the list goes on.
2) Trust her coaches. This is probably one of the hardest, but most gratifying lessons. You have to realize that between school and gym, your daughter will be spending the smallest amount of time with you. Trust is very critical given that the skills she will be learning are crazy hard.
3) Don't watch practice. The sport is your daughter's and there is absolutely nothing that can be gained by a parent from watching practice. You have to be her support system at home; you can't be her coach.
4) Educate yourself on the sport and the path that is in front of her. I chose the meet director route, but at least go out and read the rules and know where to go to find info.
5) Keep stressing the fun factor. When doing this sport becomes more of a chore than a passion to pursue, things go bad. Stress that she does still have family obligations and school obligations that will keep her well-rounded. Take opportunities to explore parts of the country that you have never been to on the out of town trips.
6) Realize that there will be teen drama and team drama; try to encourage her to stay above that and instead be a teen and team leader.
7) Help her to develop the work ethic of an athlete. Do everything required during workout, even all of the strength and conditioning. Help her to know that taking shortcuts will only hurt her in the end.

Wow, this got long. Anyhow, hope this helps.

Good Luck.

 

[cbone]

MD, work ethic really isn't an issue- unless it's about stretching on her own. How did you motivate your daughter to put in the time outside of practice on the thing(s) she didn't love to do?

 

[MeetDirector]

cbone -

That's just it - no gymnastics outside of practice. She has to get everything that is expected done at the gym. On her own (maybe with the coach's "motivation") she had to come to the conclusion that getting it done correctly during her workout was the right thing to do. It is amazing what rope climbs and bungees do for motivating (as well as building strength).

I should have also added that doing this sport at this level is truely a family commitment; everyone has to be on the same page moving in the same direction because sacrifices will have to be made.

 

[cbone]

Her coach asked her to stretch at home every day. She hates to stretch, but she conditions obsessively on her own. I went to see her at recess at school last week (I was chaperoning her brother's field trip) and she was leading five other kids in conditioning on the playground.

I don't think you can stretch too much, but I know you can condition too much. We'll have to find a way to back her off.

 

[Granny Smith]

Learn to balance gym and "outside" life. In the beginning, all she will crave is gym, gym, gym (as a youngen), but as she becomes a teenager a school dance and other activities will gain importance (at least to her). If you do not have the balance, she will come to resent gym for everything else she has had to give up. It's a fine line and balance does require giving up important school activities, but it also requires giving up gym sometimes. If you have a healthy, happy teenager, you will have a happy gymnast.

Example - My dd had to not go to her freshman semi-formal dance (something she really wanted to do) because we were going out of town for a meet (sadly, not a good meet either in the end). Was able to attend Sophomore semi-formal. Major clash this year with Junior prom, dd really, really wanted to go and then with the newly added boyfriend, Jr prom was a big thing she wanted to do. Jr. prom was the same weekend as 10 Regionals. she ended up going to Jr. Prom on Friday and thankfully her competition was on Sunday, but even if it was 8am Sat. she would of still went to the prom. We were in driving distance of Regionals and with my child being as mental as she is, the happier she is the better she would do. She went into the gym everyday, was hitting everything. Her big focus was the prom! She even went to practice the day of the prom. We had to compromise. No big updo on the hair, on the way home from gym we called her boyfriend and told him what time to come over. She had talked to the teachers about possibly showing up late to the prom and they were ok with that. She went and had a wonderful time and came home immediately afterwards. Letting her go was the best thing I could of done.

Next year, senior year, she already knows that she will not be able to go on her senior class trip because of when it falls because of gymnastics, BUT Senior prom will be a definite because it's after the season. As for senior class trip, I just tell her oh hell, I'll send you to Disney in the summer!! I know it's not the same, but it's not too bad of a deal.

 

[Deleted member 14190]

Learn to balance gym and "outside" life. In the beginning, all she will crave is gym, gym, gym (as a youngen), but as she becomes a teenager a school dance and other activities will gain importance (at least to her). If you do not have the balance, she will come to resent gym for everything else she has had to give up. It's a fine line and balance does require giving up important school activities, but it also requires giving up gym sometimes. If you have a healthy, happy teenager, you will have a happy gymnast.

Example - My dd had to not go to her freshman semi-formal dance (something she really wanted to do) because we were going out of town for a meet (sadly, not a good meet either in the end). Was able to attend Sophomore semi-formal. Major clash this year with Junior prom, dd really, really wanted to go and then with the newly added boyfriend, Jr prom was a big thing she wanted to do. Jr. prom was the same weekend as 10 Regionals. she ended up going to Jr. Prom on Friday and thankfully her competition was on Sunday, but even if it was 8am Sat. she would of still went to the prom. We were in driving distance of Regionals and with my child being as mental as she is, the happier she is the better she would do. She went into the gym everyday, was hitting everything. Her big focus was the prom! She even went to practice the day of the prom. We had to compromise. No big updo on the hair, on the way home from gym we called her boyfriend and told him what time to come over. She had talked to the teachers about possibly showing up late to the prom and they were ok with that. She went and had a wonderful time and came home immediately afterwards. Letting her go was the best thing I could of done.

Next year, senior year, she already knows that she will not be able to go on her senior class trip because of when it falls because of gymnastics, BUT Senior prom will be a definite because it's after the season. As for senior class trip, I just tell her oh hell, I'll send you to Disney in the summer!! I know it's not the same, but it's not too bad of a deal.

==
I second the "Don't watch practice" and third, and fourth....

 

[Natasha]

As others have said, start learning balance.
As the hours go up, she will occasionally need a break from gym. There have been times when my dd benefited way more from skipping practice (or leaving early) going home and getting to bed early for a change rather than going to practice. Also, be prepared for the competition to be tougher. She competed L4 this year, right? A lot of kids drop out from L4 to optionals, so what is left is the more talented kids. You will notice this even more as she progresses through optional levels. Be prepared for her to possibly not be on the podium (or possibly not in the top 1/2).

As others have said too, trust the coaches. They will now have choices about what skills to compete. Those decisions are made by the coaches and can change from one meet to the next and are sometimes based on more than just what will score well, so you have to trust that they have a long term plan and realize that as a parent, you have no input on what level she does or what skills within the level.

Enjoy the ride!

 

[bogwoppit]

Remember that lots of really talented kids drop out of gym between L4 and L6 too. Despite their apparent talents, they are just not into the harder work, the pressure or once the injuries begin, they cannot deal with them. Kids stop gym for tons of reasons, so do be aware of the pressure you put on her, without realising often, it can back fire. To succeed in gym she needs to have internal drive, not nagging parents.

 

[Jabba]

Optional is often a bigger jump than it initially seems, especially mentally. It's kind of like the "high school" of gymnastics. In compulsories, theres often more hand holding to get things done and less working idependently. To be a successful optional, a gymnast MUST be able to work on her own. It will show at this level if she can't. You need a lot of strength and the proper progressions to be able to complete the skills at optional.

Balance is another great point. Optionals = more hours = less time for outside gym life. It IS a balance, but also from a coach's side, it's extremely hard to do well in optional if you're not in the gym a lot. It's not like compulsories where some kids can appear a few times a week and still do back handsprings. You need to be in the gym a lot more: training, perfecting and getting stronger.

Lastly, expect farther meet travel and of course more money for everything involved.

 

[B&M's mom]

Also be prepared for the injuries, the small and the large. There is a lot more pounding on their bodies in optionals and it accumulates. Invest in ibruprofen, ice packs and get a good sports med doctor's number.

 

[Jabba]

^^ yep. And coming back after injuries is yet another challenge.

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[cbone]

What's the toughest part about coming back from injury?

 

[cbifoja]

Our coach wants the girls in the gym even when injured. She designs specific conditioning exercises that protect the injured part while keeping the rest of the body strong. So many girls begin skipping practice when injured, they fall behind, and because they weren't keeping up with their conditioning, when they come back, they are weaker and can't get caught back up. This causes frustration and poor inner-talk which is defeating.

 

[Jabba]

I design specific conditioning and want them in the gym as well. The hard part is that regardless, when a girl is unable to practice fully because of injury, her teammates progress (at least skillwise) without her. Some kids are motivated to catch up when they get back from being injured. Some feel defeated and give up because they are behind the people they were once with or afraid of things the used to be able to do.

Optionals requires maturity to handle things like that.

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[B&M's mom]

Dealing the fact that not all injuries heal quickly or completely in a short period of time. My daughter fractured her elbow. The fracture is healed but because she didn't use the arm (though she did do OT to keep range of motion) she has to rebuild the arm. It hurts. She's frustrated because she wasn't anticipating that she wouldn't be ready to go immediately and that it still hurts.

Then there are the lingering injuries-Sever's or other joint inflammation where there's no quick fix and they either learn to deal with tumbling with pain or leave the sport. Puberty is hard on the body and when you add the pounding that their bodies take, all sorts of things crop up.

 

[my4buffaloes]

Get used to the fact that something always hurts. Even if they aren't injured they hurt in general. It is more exciting though, so be prepared for it to be more fun!