Parents Struggling level 6 gymnast

[Gymmom123!]

My daughter is a level 6 gymnast, she’s not doing the best. Actually her last meet she came in last place with a 33.

When she first started competing in Level 3, she would always be in first or second place but over the years she has not been in the top 10.

My husband and I are really wanting to be done (especially my husband) but my daughter still loves it, but it is an expensive sport and it is tough to watch kids she was better than now be consistently at the top while she’s consistently at the bottom. Should we continue in hopes she’ll improve or has she reached her peak? She has gotten taller and bigger than the other girls, feet sickled at times and does not run fast. Just want to try to make the best decision for her. I’d like to hear honest thoughts and opinions.

 

[ProudGymnast]

winning≠success

Scores and places aren't everything! Instead of focusing on that, maybe next time try to set a goal with her; stick a tumbling pass, point her toes in her back pass, hit handstand on bars, etc.

As a gymnast, it can really bring you down when your parents are concerned about your scores. Try to make her feel happy about her little wins, such as staying on beam, having fun during her floor routine, or being extra powerful on vault. Either way, please try to be positive about it. When I was disappointed with myself the sweetest thing was when my parents just told me how amazingly crazy the stuff I'm doing is and took me to DQ haha.

And if she LOVES it then I see no reason to pull her out because she isn't "good." You never see the full story at practice, with blocks, injuries, peer pressure, body image issues, etc so placement really is irrelevant unless your trying to be elite/college which I'll assume is not the goal anymore.

personally, I just do gym for the sheer joy of it. And thats a-ok. If you want encouragement, I never was one that placed or scored very high in low levels, rather I had difficulty. Now, I'm doing quite well as a level 9, it has evened out. The little hotshots scoring 38s lower down quit, burned out, or deal with major injuries in my experience. Or shot up to 10 a while ago. I don't have perfect form, but my body awareness has improved and my difficulty has been a useful tool.

 

[txgymfan]

Think and write your and her reasons for doing gymnastics? Have her make her own list. At level 6 does it matter where she places? Why does it matter? No one when she is 20 or 15 or a year from now or a month from now will care where she places at meets.

Think with your husband what you want her to get out of the sport and if gymnastics is meeting those goals ( exercise, friends, a place to belong etc.) Ask your daughter why she likes it, then decide if it makes sense to continue.

Are you upset about the cost, the time involved ? Think what would she be doing if she wasn’t in the gym. All youth sports cost money and they all take time.

 

[Stranger.maci]

My daughter is a level 7 this year. Actually has a meet this afternoon. She has never won a meet nor been at the top of the podium. Highest score so far this year, a 33. But she loves gym. Human nature causes us to get wrapped up in scoring. I'm guilty of it at times too. You got great advice above. Try to focus on the improvements at each meet. Wherever they are. And comparing is the thief of joy. I repeat that in my head a lot . I also think sometimes were sucked into believing pretty much every kid who does gym long term is a super star. Just not true.

 

[rlm's mom]

My daughter is a level 6 gymnast, she’s not doing the best. Actually her last meet she came in last place with a 33.

Why is she scoring so low? Is it because of start values, multiple falls or just bad form?

 

[Gymmom123!]

Why is she scoring so low? Is it because of start values, multiple falls or just bad form?

Her start value on the bar is 9.5, she doesn’t have all of the skills. She struggles to pull herself all the way up to horizontal over the bar (sorry don’t know the name of the skills lol), but she struggles to do them on the bar. In addition, I don’t think she has the best form, like on floor, pointing her toes, good straddle jumps or leaps. She never falls though‍

 

[rlm's mom]

Her start value on the bar is 9.5, she doesn’t have all of the skills. She struggles to pull herself all the way up to horizontal over the bar (sorry don’t know the name of the skills lol), but she struggles to do them on the bar. In addition, I don’t think she has the best form, like on floor, pointing her toes, good straddle jumps or leaps. She never falls though‍

Might be an idea to switch over to Xcel, she'll have more options which skills she wants to compete + less hours of practice. Sounds like she'd be gold. Does your gym offer that program?

 

[Gymmom123!]

My daughter is a level 7 this year. Actually has a meet this afternoon. She has never won a meet nor been at the top of the podium. Highest score so far this year, a 33. But she loves gym. Human nature causes us to get wrapped up in scoring. I'm guilty of it at times too. You got great advice above. Try to focus on the improvements at each meet. Wherever they are. And comparing is the thief of joy. I repeat that in my head a lot . I also think sometimes were sucked into believing pretty much every kid who does gym long term is a super star. Just not true.

Thank you for your response, I do try to tell myself not to compare, it’s honestly hard not to. My best friend’s daughter is a level 7, they started gymnastics at the same time, she is always at the top of the podium and everyone knows my daughter started out better than her. Sorry, there I go comparing but again it’s hard not to. Who doesn’t want their child to be the best! Thing is my daughter will say she wants to be the best, but I’m not sure she is working hard enough to be the best. Anywho, thanks again! And good luck to your daughter this afternoon

 

[Gymmom123!]

Might be an idea to switch over to Xcel, she'll have more options which skills she wants to compete + less hours of practice. Sounds like she'd be gold. Does your gym offer that program?

Might be an idea to switch over to Xcel, she'll have more options which skills she wants to compete + less hours of practice. Sounds like she'd be gold. Does your gym offer that program?

I have definitely mentioned Xcel several times but she doesn’t want to switch. It sounds as if she’s worried about what her current teammates will think or say.

 

[ReluctantGymMom]

I honestly thought you were a friend of mine reading your post!!! They are also having intense difficulty with her not “doing well” at level 6 after always being first place in lower level Compulsories.

This is our first year of 6 - your daughter is not alone in struggling. I’ll tell you what I tell my friend; Take the small victories, you see that 7 something become an 8 something on beam? Awesome, connected non-flight series! One day that 7-something on bars will be an 8-something and it’ll mean she hit her cast start value. We had 4 girls start off in the 7s on bars because of casts and clear hips, 1 hit a 9 on her 4th meet, 2 are hitting 8s now. Vault is terrible? Welcome to nearly everyone’s world - I’ve noticed a few gyms produce incredible vault timers and everyone else is stuck in mid-8s.

The beauty of 6 is it’s not a required level. Our coach told me, the point isn’t to win level 6, it’s to get ready for level 7 and further. So each time they add harder and harder skills to my daughters routines, maybe she places worst right now but she’ll have much more experience for level 7.

You gotta reframe it. What’s the goal here? It should be to enjoy the sport, want to keep learning and growing

 

[Gymmom123!]

winning≠success

Scores and places aren't everything! Instead of focusing on that, maybe next time try to set a goal with her; stick a tumbling pass, point her toes in her back pass, hit handstand on bars, etc.

As a gymnast, it can really bring you down when your parents are concerned about your scores. Try to make her feel happy about her little wins, such as staying on beam, having fun during her floor routine, or being extra powerful on vault. Either way, please try to be positive about it. When I was disappointed with myself the sweetest thing was when my parents just told me how amazingly crazy the stuff I'm doing is and took me to DQ haha.

And if she LOVES it then I see no reason to pull her out because she isn't "good." You never see the full story at practice, with blocks, injuries, peer pressure, body image issues, etc so placement really is irrelevant unless your trying to be elite/college which I'll assume is not the goal anymore.

personally, I just do gym for the sheer joy of it. And thats a-ok. If you want encouragement, I never was one that placed or scored very high in low levels, rather I had difficulty. Now, I'm doing quite well as a level 9, it has evened out. The little hotshots scoring 38s lower down quit, burned out, or deal with major injuries in my experience. Or shot up to 10 a while ago. I don't have perfect form, but my body awareness has improved and my difficulty has been a useful tool.

Thank you so much for your feedback. It’s nice to hear a gymnast’s perspective. I guess there is still a part of me that believes she could be elite/college level but maybe not. You mentioned you’re level 9, are you trying for elite/college level gymnastics? Just wondering when you get that far, what your plans may be after that.

 

[TumbleTimes4]

There is a common misconception that lower level success will equal optional level success, and that’s just not always the case. It appears that the bigger issue here is your pride as a parent rather than if continuing gymnastics is what’s best for your daughter. If you stop gymnastics and she picks up another sport, will you also consider it not worth the time and money if she isn’t the best in that? The vast majority of kids who play any type of sport aren’t getting college scholarships, let alone going pro or to the Olympics. If sports and activities are only “worth it” if your daughter can be the best or grab a college scholarship, then you probably shouldn’t have her do any sport or activity. Gymnastics is so much more than scores and results. The life lessons it teaches are invaluable. I think you’ll find that if you swallow your pride and stop worrying about placements and celebrate the other successes, you’ll both be much happier and you’ll begin to see the true benefit of the sport.

 

[Stranger.maci]

There is a common misconception that lower level success will equal optional level success, and that’s just not always the case. It appears that the bigger issue here is your pride as a parent rather than if continuing gymnastics is what’s best for your daughter. If you stop gymnastics and she picks up another sport, will you also consider it not worth the time and money if she isn’t the best in that? The vast majority of kids who play any type of sport aren’t getting college scholarships, let alone going pro or to the Olympics. If sports and activities are only “worth it” if your daughter can be the best or grab a college scholarship, then you probably shouldn’t have her do any sport or activity. Gymnastics is so much more than scores and results. The life lessons it teaches are invaluable. I think you’ll find that if you swallow your pride and stop worrying about placements and celebrate the other successes, you’ll both be much happier and you’ll begin to see the true benefit of the sport.

I love this advice. ❤

 

[Gymmom123!]

There is a common misconception that lower level success will equal optional level success, and that’s just not always the case. It appears that the bigger issue here is your pride as a parent rather than if continuing gymnastics is what’s best for your daughter. If you stop gymnastics and she picks up another sport, will you also consider it not worth the time and money if she isn’t the best in that? The vast majority of kids who play any type of sport aren’t getting college scholarships, let alone going pro or to the Olympics. If sports and activities are only “worth it” if your daughter can be the best or grab a college scholarship, then you probably shouldn’t have her do any sport or activity. Gymnastics is so much more than scores and results. The life lessons it teaches are invaluable. I think you’ll find that if you swallow your pride and stop worrying about placements and celebrate the other successes, you’ll both be much happier and you’ll begin to see the true benefit of the sport.

I love this advice. ❤

Thanks for that reality check lol. You’re right, what if she doesn’t do well in that sport (currently thinking about volleyball). But then I think it’ll be less money, less traveling. I appreciate your candor because I know it does have a lot to do with my pride and I have to figure out how to swallow it.

 

[pt coach]

Just chiming in to say that I love coaching level 6 because there can be such dramatic growth during this level. As a parent it may help to focus on whether she hits her casts and gets that 10 start value, or whatever other goal she is trying to reach that is not related to score or placement. I remember celebrating with my daughter when just one judge gave her a 10 start on level 7 bars (she could clear hip to handstand out of a horizontal cast...and often did). I have no recollection of her scores or places that season, but she and I both happily remember that moment.

As a side note, my niece does travel volleyball and it is super expensive - at least as much as gymnastics. I think this is the case now with most travel sports!

 

[ReluctantGymMom]

Thanks for that reality check lol. You’re right, what if she doesn’t do well in that sport (currently thinking about volleyball). But then I think it’ll be less money, less traveling. I appreciate your candor because I know it does have a lot to do with my pride and I have to figure out how to swallow it.

Our teammates sister does comp volleyball - their monthly fees are cheaper than gymnastics but their travel costs are INSANE and they travel a lot more than we do, out of state usually. I couldn’t deal, it’s literally every weekend!

 

[mommyof1]

If she is happy and you can afford it, let her continue! I know firsthand how frustrating it is to watch your child work hard and come in last. But gymnastics is not about the parent, it's about the child. If she is still loving it and working hard, it would be cruel to pull her just because she is no longer at the top of the podium. If she were unhappy or goofing off during practice, that might be reason to consider pulling the plug.

 

[MuggleMom]

My DD is good but not spectacular at gymnastics. She always places middle of the road and its never really bothered her or me. For me as long as she is working hard and progressing I am happy. Elite is definitely not on the table for her...college thats just a maybe and to be honest not sure if she would want to do it in college. Most kids are not exceptional at sports and that's ok. My other kiddo plays baseball and she is fine at it and sometimes I struggle with her not wanting "more" more practice, travel ball, to excel but honestly its ok if she is just ok at it. She gets exercise she is happy shes made great friends. I work on focusing on that.

I get the expense part of the sport but you have to be willing to spend the money if they are the best or the worst otherwise you'll drive yourself crazy and end up making the kid feel like a burden.

 

[ProudGymnast]

Thank you so much for your feedback. It’s nice to hear a gymnast’s perspective. I guess there is still a part of me that believes she could be elite/college level but maybe not. You mentioned you’re level 9, are you trying for elite/college level gymnastics? Just wondering when you get that far, what your plans may be after that.

Yes Level 9, but senior year. I have been steadily improving at my meets, and have some new upgrades, but it just depends on how I perform at states/regionals/nationals. And D1 as a level 9 really isn't even on the table, but possibly D2 or D3 for the fun of it. If not, I am LOVING coaching. And since I've quit twice before, was a below average compulsory, and started at the little gym, it's a miracle I am here now. But for me, I always thoroughly wanted to pursue my dream of college gym, and I loved proving people wrong, and I worked the hardest out of anyone in the gym, and its starting to catch up to me finally. But if I don't make it any further? I am more than a gymnast and the lessons it has taught me are still enough to make the hard days worth it, the joy I have got from it, it's enough.

And as a parent I totally get it that it is hard paying a fortune, and then seeing everyone exceed her, but every journey is different. The hardest part about gymnastics is trusting the process but its vital, even if that process would take her to a third year level 7, a college scholarship, or a gymnastics coaching job. Every path is different, so they yield different rewards. I guess the tone I was getting from your first post is that if she doesn't make a name for herself, it's not worth it to keep going, but in gymnastics it isn't like that at all.

Anyways, hang in there, being a gymnastics parent is rough. I'm not one but I SO appreciate everyone who is. I don't know how you guys do it.

 

[Gymmom123!]

Yes Level 9, but senior year. I have been steadily improving at my meets, and have some new upgrades, but it just depends on how I perform at states/regionals/nationals. And D1 as a level 9 really isn't even on the table, but possibly D2 or D3 for the fun of it. If not, I am LOVING coaching. And since I've quit twice before, was a below average compulsory, and started at the little gym, it's a miracle I am here now. But for me, I always thoroughly wanted to pursue my dream of college gym, and I loved proving people wrong, and I worked the hardest out of anyone in the gym, and its starting to catch up to me finally. But if I don't make it any further? I am more than a gymnast and the lessons it has taught me are still enough to make the hard days worth it, the joy I have got from it, it's enough.

And as a parent I totally get it that it is hard paying a fortune, and then seeing everyone exceed her, but every journey is different. The hardest part about gymnastics is trusting the process but its vital, even if that process would take her to a third year level 7, a college scholarship, or a gymnastics coaching job. Every path is different, so they yield different rewards. I guess the tone I was getting from your first post is that if she doesn't make a name for herself, it's not worth it to keep going, but in gymnastics it isn't like that at all.

Anyways, hang in there, being a gymnastics parent is rough. I'm not one but I SO appreciate everyone who is. I don't know how you guys do it.

Wow! That was very insightful and honest! I really appreciate it. Also, thank you for seeing my perspective and learning yours has helped me in my thought process. Once again, thank you and good luck with whatever path you choose!!!!