WAG What would decertification mean for us?

[3rd_time_around]

Can't wait for Valeri to be shown the door. Totally part of the problem.

? I don't agree with this. But that's just MHO.

 

[John]

@GAgymmom I am referring to any usag coach who wishes to attend. Not just the coaches associated with athletes attending. Furthermore parents should never be asked to turn over their children, ever again. Any speak of that should be should be cometely ignored.

I am sure the old way has some very good aspects but after this horrific tragedy gymnastics needs to distance itself from any training characteristic that is questionable. That is my feeling.

 

[FlippinLilysMom]

Not all parents can afford to travel with their kids to a camp every 3 months. I would 110% trust sending my daughter with her coaches. And a lot of the abuse happened with the parents and coaches in the room.

 

[skschlag]

Not all parents can afford to travel with their kids to a camp every 3 months. I would 110% trust sending my daughter with her coaches. And a lot of the abuse happened with the parents and coaches in the room.

Sorry..no. This is no longer allowed wtih Safe Sport. Must be multiple kids/coaches if they are traveling together. Gyms doing this are breaking the new rules. And parents should absolutely not allow it. Many coaches have been 100% trusted,until they ar enot.

 

[FlippinLilysMom]

Sorry..no. This is no longer allowed wtih Safe Sport. Must be multiple kids/coaches if they are traveling together. Gyms doing this are breaking the new rules. And parents should absolutely not allow it. Many coaches have been 100% trusted,until they ar enot.

We have 2 head coaches that always travel with the girls.

 

[skschlag]

We have 2 head coaches that always travel with the girls.

and multiple girls.

 

[sce]

I've heard they are looking at space in Florida for the new training center.

A sports organization in Florida is courting them, not sure how serious USAG is about it.

 

[FlippinLilysMom]

and multiple girls.

Yes...hence the word "girls" and one mom has always traveled with also.

 

[skschlag]

Yes...hence the word "girls" and one mom has always traveled with also.

So that is very different than totally trusting your coaches to travel with your kiddo

 

[FlippinLilysMom]

My statement was that I would. My daughter hasn't been invited to a camp so we haven't had to deal with this but if she ever does I would have no issues sending her with her coaches. She is already with them more than she is with me. They are like a second family to us.

 

[FlippinLilysMom]

And judge me all you want but this kind of stuff can happen anywhere, anytime and to anyone...even the most hyper vigilant parent. Like I said in my earlier post, a lot of the abuse happened with the parents and the coaches in the room.

 

[skschlag]

And judge me all you want but this kind of stuff can happen anywhere, anytime and to anyone...even the most hyper vigilant parent. Like I said in my earlier post, a lot of the abuse happened with the parents and the coaches in the room.

Oh.. I get that..but a coach traveling alone with a gymnast is no longer allowed. But multiple...that's different.

 

[Hollowarchkick]

JOs were in Indy last year. Nice place but the flight prices were very high. I’m in Texas and I wouldn’t care if it moved to a central hub. Chicago, St. Louis, Dallas and Houston makes sense. Most people can find those cities affordable and easy to fly into.
The Hopes Championships is not a large meet. There aren’t many competitors and renting out a convention center would cost way too much.

 

[Madden3]

Like I said in my earlier post, a lot of the abuse happened with the parents and the coaches in the room.

I just want to address this.

Sexual abuse can and does happen in the same room as parents when parents are either not watching with enough care and alertness, or they are not educated about what is appropriate and what it not, or they have been so intimidated or manipulated they are powerless to advocate for their child.

I do not know the details of every instance this happened in this case, but for the times it happened during medical exams/treatment, this could happen if the parent is either not being alert (perhaps are even being deliberately distracted) or is not informed about what should and should not be happening during such an exam or treatment, or feels so threatened they keep quiet.

So the solution is not to say "well having a parent there does no good anyway so no need for the parent to be there." A solution would be that parents are better educated (and they will probably have to educate themselves) about why they need to be alert, and what they need to be alert for when it comes to a doctor (or anyone else) having physical contact with their children. And they need to understand how they might be manipulated in various ways so their child can be abused.

In this case, there is the added complication of this weird "pelvic floor" treatment that would have been particularly confusing to a parent. However in the descriptions I read, he still used his body or other items in the room to block what he was doing. Ok, a parent who understands what they have to be watching out for will know that this is a no no. A doctor must not do this. The parent needs to be there precisely so they can watch so they have to be able to see what the doctor is doing. And they need to know what is appropriate and what it not. They also have to be assertive enough to say "I think we will skip that until I have a chance to learn more about it" if the doctor is suggesting a treatment that seems hinky.

Of course we know now that this abuse happened not in a vacuum, but in an overall abusive culture, a culture that used many practices in order to attempt to render both parents and gymnasts powerless. But again this is not an argument that parental oversight is not helpful. It is helpful. It is vital. Again what is needed is education so parents can identify and protect themselves from such cultures and the tactics used to prevent us from protecting our children.

So. It really bothers me to see "but parents were right in the room" used to suggest that parental supervision (appropriately done) does nothing to prevent abuse. This is a very destructive falsehood.

Some of the victims told their coaches or parents they were being abused and were not believed and were even shamed. Should we also tell victims not to come forward because the people these girls told completely mishandled the situation and the abuse continued? Of course not. That is absurd. It is also absurd to suggest that the fact that because abuse can happen with parents in the room means that there is no point in parents appropriately supervising their children!

 

[gymdoc]

80% of sexual abuse occurs in a one adult - one child circumstance. The "parent in the room" is not common. So I agree with above poster that avoiding child alone with a coach scenario still goes a long way to prevent an opportunity for abuse

 

[2G1B]

IMO, in general, the entire not ALLOWING a parent to be at anything is the issue. Gyms that do not ALLOW a parent to observe practice - an issue, a training center where parents are not ALLOWED to come with their child, even if paying for their own place to sleep - an issue. At a minimum it should be encouraged if a group of girls (or boys) are going that one parent chaperone go too along with the coaches or if not encouraged, at least allowed. The culture of the parents are ignorant and don't know what is going on (or that if they are involved they are automatically TOO involved) needs to stop. There is nothing wrong with it if I want to watch my kid practice as long as I'm not distracting my kid and not then going home and trying to correct my kid on technique (though, if I see me kid goofing off too much, I absolutely will tell them that they need to pay better attention in practice). I have dealt with some coaches who seemed to be of the mindset that parents should completely stay out of all things related to their kids' gymnastics other than paying the bill and driving them where they need to be. That is not appropriate.

 

[BachFlyer]

IMO, in general, the entire not ALLOWING a parent to be at anything is the issue. Gyms that do not ALLOW a parent to observe practice - an issue, a training center where parents are not ALLOWED to come with their child, even if paying for their own place to sleep - an issue. At a minimum it should be encouraged if a group of girls (or boys) are going that one parent chaperone go too along with the coaches or if not encouraged, at least allowed. The culture of the parents are ignorant and don't know what is going on (or that if they are involved they are automatically TOO involved) needs to stop. There is nothing wrong with it if I want to watch my kid practice as long as I'm not distracting my kid and not then going home and trying to correct my kid on technique (though, if I see me kid goofing off too much, I absolutely will tell them that they need to pay better attention in practice). I have dealt with some coaches who seemed to be of the mindset that parents should completely stay out of all things related to their kids' gymnastics other than paying the bill and driving them where they need to be. That is not appropriate.

Yup.

 

[munchkin3]

Agreed Bach.....parents ARE part of the process and they can be beneficial. Remember.....this is a sport involving CHILDREN....
Gymnastics habitually erases parents from the equation and that has to change too.

 

[Deleted member 18037]

2 Way mirror for viewing, cameras. Outsiders can watch. Athletes are not distracted. This is not hard stuff.

 

[skschlag]

I still think distracted athletes is a cop out. Really. They compete with lots of people watching, making noise, others competing, music, etc. TO say that athletes are distracted is just a way for the gym to get out of it. If kids are initially distracted, then it is a skill they need to learn, and better to learn in practice.

Ours is wide open. Everwhere. There is a fence between parents and the gym, so we can see and hear everything. The only distracted ones are the ones that are new, or are goign to be distracted anyway.

I love how open and transparent it is.