WAG 6 year old mental toughness (tears during practice)

[SurpriseGymMom]

Not dissing you at all, but honestly ballet is hard as hell. I flunked out.

I so agree with this. I have one dancer, and I have taken ballet classes. I have one gymnast, and I'm a gymnastics coach. I would never call ballet "easy". It's an absolute toss up between which sport/art form is more physically demanding. In different ways for sure, but ballet is HARD, have no doubts about that..! Nothing irritates dedicated dancers more than when people think all they do is put on a pink tutu and twirl around pretending to be butterflies or whatever, lol! My dancer is every bit as physically fit as my competitive gymnast!

And FTR, my dancer has that same tee except it says "if ballet was easy...."

 

[txgymfan]

I have to admit, those shirts are a pet peeve of mine. Your sport can be hard without putting down another one.

Football players could get hurt doing gym but gymnasts don't have to remember dozens of plays per meet and they don't get hit by other gymnasts. There are no mats on a football field.

 

[duyetanh]

I have to admit, those shirts are a pet peeve of mine. Your sport can be hard without putting down another one.

Football players could get hurt doing gym but gymnasts don't have to remember dozens of plays per meet and they don't get hit by other gymnasts. There are no mats on a football field.

I get that, truly. But it was fun to buy mine a shirt that said it, mainly because she is such the opposite of a football player. But yes, all sports are hard.

 

[eucoach]

I literally had tears in my eyes seeing her react because she is so hard on herself. Any advice on how to help her navigate these feelings and not be so hard on herself. I say all the right things, but it's not helping. Thank you

Please try your best not to feel emotional when your daughter feels emotional. I know this is probably very difficult but it is not going to make her feel better or teach her how to cope with her own frustrations better. Not only will she feel feel frustrated about herself, she will also feel frustrated for making you feel bad! I have recently had a gymnast quit (I've posted about this) whose mother showed the same behavior. I think at 6, it's enough if she feels safe when she's with you and learns to leave these things at the gym and not take them home with her. I also don't think a child that young is able to talk about this. I doubt she's able to verbalize her frustrations adquately or is truly able to understand what you are telling her. It should be enough for her to know that it's ok to be frustrated (and cry about it once in a while) and that she will improve over time if she keeps working. Mom however, will not be frustrated because she knows it's normal and nothing can be forced!

 

[aquatica]

Does your daughter also have issues with frustration outside of the gym? If so, I would suggest working on it with her in that context, and the coping skills that she learns at home will transfer to other places. Things that some people find useful are learning deep breathing exercises and muscle contraction/relaxation exercises. The goal is to help them become aware of their frustration before being overwhelmed by it and then consciously relax themselves.

 

[triplethreat+1]

Totally agree with both of the above! At this age, your emotional response means more than your words. So be sure to take some deep breaths before she sees you!
Work on teaching her to calm herself at home when frustrations come up. I have taught my ds 2.5 to stop and take a deep breath, then try again (he has speech delays).
My other thought (which may or may not apply to your dd) is that I find kids are praised for everything they produce/do. And while good effort should always be praised, it should be acknowledged that results are not always tied to efforts. Of course that is a long-term issue, but something to keep in mind.