Parents Frustrated with DD's gym :(

[TexasRose]

I'm frustrated with DD's gym. Maybe in need of a reality check, lol . Here's what's going on-
DD is in Level 3 at her gym, they have a very small program- only about 30 girls with 9 on level 3. The 3's only get to practice 1 day a week for 3 hours, even though some of the moms have asked if they could practice twice a week. The gym said that they don't have time or room. The 4's practice 2 days a week for 3 hrs and the 5's get 3 days a week for 3 hours.
The other day at DD's practice I noticed that her group of 3's did not do floor, at all. They only practiced beam, bars, and vault. When I remarked on it one of the other level 3 moms said that they didn't do floor last week either-I wasn't there last week because I was working. It frustrates me a little that it's now been 2 weeks since they've practiced their floor routine. I've actually never even seen DD do her's in its entirety and they start competing in January.
Then when the girls were doing vault the coach at that station wasn't even paying attention. He was looking at the older girls and wasn't watching our girls at all. I get that it's "just a dive roll" but they could still get hurt. He wasn't offering any corrections either. I'm not a coach and I try not to judge coaching because I don't know how to but I know DD is supposed to do an arm circle during vault. She's not doing it at all and it's not being corrected. So this frustrates me. Should it? Or am I being a CGM?
Last thing- I promise . At the end of practice the girls all sit on the side of floor and watch as they each do an individual tumbling pass. For the last 3 practices I've been at every team has done this but the 3's. They sit and watch everyone else though. Shouldn't they get their turn too? Especially since they're only able to practice that 1 day a week?

I'd love some advice. I'm totally type A and controlling and I work hard to not be a CGM. If this wouldn't frustrate you please let me know or if it would let me know. Just trying to see if I am having realistic expectations or being crazy, lol

 

[AlwaysCuriousMom]

I feel like I have been in your situation. I guess the question to ask is, do they have a reputable gymnastics program? Do they have a solid team? High level gymnasts? Good compulsary team? Good management? My DD spent pre-team at a gym where I felt the way you are feeling ALL THE TIME. I did the research on the gym, the owners, coaches, talked to parents at other gyms, and determined after a few months that I needed to move my DD. Now, my daughter is at gym where I trust the owner and coaches wholeheartedly. I know that when I start questioning things, there is a reasonable explanation for why things are done. Sure enough, there is ALWAYS a reasonable explanation.

I'm not saying that you should switch gyms, I'm only saying that the only way to put your mind at ease is to ask questions. Perhaps there is a good reason for what they are doing. Sometimes my DD says "we didn't do bars today" or "we only did XXX today." However, I do think the coach should be watching the skills (at the very least). My DD's old gym used to have the girls try skills over and over with no correction. I remember there were girls who practiced crooked backhandsprings for hours on end. Some of the pre-team girls would hit their head on their backhandsprings and be allowed to do it over and over. We, the newbie moms, would just look at each other wondering if that was normal. FYI - it's not normal. I left after a few girls (more than 2) injured or broke their arms due to stress fractures. Both the coach and owners explained the injuries away, taking no responsibility.

I want you to know that it is possible to be part of a gym where you and DD are happy. It's important to trust the coaches. Don't tell yourself that this feeling of uneasiness is normal. Pls ask questions.

 

[emorymom]

?? My kids' gym has the girl L3s go 9 hours, the L4s go 12. I'd say that is within normal for the area, but maybe on the high end.

I don't think that's realistic for a lot of kids to be able to progress at the pace they might hope for. Some will. I would think many would struggle. The Y team near us goes 6 hours at all levels, and from what I've heard a lot of them get stuck at L4 for longer than at other gyms that train more hours. But then it's a lifestyle choice for the parents and the gym. There's a lot to be said for having a 6-hour team around.

 

[MaryA]

We just switched our daughter from a YMCA gym to a private gym for similar reasons. Things like lack of hours was beyond the control of the coaches, and I felt like the Y just wished the gymnastics team would just dissappear so they could add more Zumba and Piloxing (???) classes. Some things, like inconsistant spotting, lack of corrections, and favoritism could definitely have been dealt with better by the coaches.

Good advice from AlwaysCurious... look at the program as a whole. If it's a solid program, your daughter is happy, and you like what you see at the upper levels, then don't sweat it. If those things aren't true, then better to look for someplace that meets your expectations now (assuming you have other options?) than later. The gym we switched to is a whole different ball game and I totally trust the coaches to make sure my daughter is safe and getting the attention she needs. I feel like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders.

 

[JessMom]

I totally understand why you are feeling frustrated and it is hard to walk that line and know when to stick your nose in.

My DD didn't do level 3 but I know our 3's come once or twice a week for 2 hours, they are usually in and out before the older girls start.

What it comes down to it with gyms is this . . . If your not happy - look around. Talk to other gyms about their programs. No matter what you do your current gym isn't going to change and maybe you need to see if you can find a gym that's a better fit for you.

Good Luck!

 

[BlairBob]

12hrs for L4 is on the high end. Our L3's did 2x3hrs I think while our L1/2s did 2x1.5hrs. Pretty typical though some L3's in some gyms may only do 2 or 2.5hrs.

 

[UnoMas]

I would not worry as much about the hours, I think the hours are well within the normal range. I would be concerned about the lack of attention by the coaches though, I have been there done that and it is super frustrating. As far as not getting to every event at each practice or even for several weeks, I have also been there done that at level 2 and 3. It did drive me crazy sometimes but I also know that sometimes the coaches focus on one event for several practices in a row to really work on corrections. So, that part could go either way. I would ask the coaches about why that is happening if you are comfortable. Open communication is really important as you go along this fabulous journey that is gymnastics!!!!

 

[TexasRose]

Thanks for all the great replies and advice! I really don't want to switch gyms. DD loves her coaches and has made some very close friends at gym. Plus, she's on the dance team there as well. The gym has recreational and competitive programs for cheer, dance, and gym. The gym program is only a few years old, there are no optional girls yet. This would bother me if we were staying here indefinitely but my husband and I have careers that require frequent moves, about every 3 years. We have about 2 more years here. I keep telling myself that DD is only 6 and that as long as she's having fun and it's safe that's all that matters. I'd like to think that when we move in 2 years if she's still in gym we can choose a gym that has optional girls and that if she's "behind" she can catch up there. Is this a good thought process? I'd hate to move her now and then again when we move in 2013. I feel like I can talk to the coaches anytime so I'm happy with that relationship I just don't want to be "that" mom that complains all the time.

So I've been telling myself that even if the coaching isn't great, we won't be here for much longer, and she's only 6. When we move and start at a new gym if she's behind then hopefully she'll catch up because the quality of coaching will probably be better. But then I read about how learning bad habits early can mess the gymnast up for a long time and I stress. I'm trying to be realistic and remind myself that at 6 as long as she's having fun that's all that matters. And that maybe because the hours are so low she won't get burnt out young and will still be in gym when we move. We'll be moving to Bethesda, Maryland and I've done a little bit of searching and there looks like there's a lot of gyms in that area. Does this make any sense? LOL

 

[Quadqueen]

I think her hours are within normal range....the poster who said her gym does 9 hours for L3 - that's a bit much!!!! It would be nice going twice a week for maybe 1.5-2 hours, but...

I also get frustrated when they don't do certain events. my DD is L5 and practices 4 days a week, and they didn't do beam for 2 weeks recently!! but I know there's a reason for everything they do.

If you plan to move in a couple of years, I would not stress too much. It seems like she won't be there long anyway

 

[Gymmonkeymomma]

I'd be more concerned over the vault coach not paying attention, that's a safety issue.

As for hours, at our old gym the Level 3's went 2 days a week for 2 hours.

Floor routines - since they are not competing till January, I would be less concerned about not going thru entire routine as long as they are working on skills (dance, leaps, tumbling). Even now, my DD (level 8) does not work routines everyday, some days they work on the skills, some days they work on "modified routines" (without tumbling or less tumbling) and other days full routines.

 

[Deleted member D3987]

yikes!.............................................

 

[Shewhodrives]

You've already gotten a lot of good advice and it sounds like you might have already have made up your mind. SO, I might be stirring the pot, but I think that two years is a long time in gymnastics and A LOT a learning will take place in two years, so if you have other gym options, I would personally research them.

 

[TexasRose]

yikes!.............................................

Dunno- why yikes? I'd love your advice.

 

[TexasRose]

You've already gotten a lot of good advice and it sounds like you might have already have made up your mind. SO, I might be stirring the pot, but I think that two years is a long time in gymnastics and A LOT a learning will take place in two years, so if you have other gym options, I would personally research them.

I have pretty much decided to stay. I was really looking for some validation that staying at an so-so gym for 2 years wouldn't really hurt her in the long run because she's so young. You're not stirring the pot at all.
There is another gym in the area, actually 15 min closer to our house. They have a bigger more successful program. But- and there's always a but - we actually started there and did dance and gym there for 2 years. DD did the dance team there and it wasn't a good fit so I pulled her from the dance team and moved her somewhere else for dance. The dance coach wanted her to practice 5 days a week for 2 hrs each day- she was 5! And exhausted and falling asleep at school so it just wasn't working. After we pulled her from dance the gym coaches- and she was only in rec classes- were not very friendly anymore. I asked about having her evaluated for pre-team after she got her kickover and pullover and they said they would check her and then never did. We waited 5 months- during this time she lost the kickover because she had a different coach every week and never practiced it. So we moved gyms, they evaluated her on the spot and put her on preteam- 2 months later moved her to level 3. One of the coaches from her old gym actually moved to the new one and said that she did evaluate her and recommended that she be moved to pre-team. The owner said that because we jumped ship in dance that she wouldn't ever put DD on any team there again. So I'm glad that we moved because DD has improved a lot and is having a blast, even though the quality of the team is not at the same level as the old gym. I've kind of justified it by telling myself that she's only 6, who knows how long she'll even do gym, and that as long as she's having fun and it's safe that it's ok that she's not at the best gym in the area. Does that make sense?

Should I talk to the HC about how the vault coach wasn't even watching last practice? Or should I let it go this time and if it happens again say something? I don't want to be known as a complainer. I hope I'm communicating this half decently, lol I really appreciate everyone's insight

 

[Deleted member D3987]

Dunno- why yikes? I'd love your advice.

i gotsta think on this one. there's so much there i don't know where to start. sleep first...

 

[TexasRose]

Oh gosh, that doesn't sound promising, lol . I'm glad to see that this isn't normal for a gym and that other parents would be frustrated too. I was worried that I was just getting too involved and in the mix.

 

[bogwoppit]

The vault thing really makes me go EEK, no way is my kid vaulting without the coach watching. I sent one of my girls to a day gymcamp, I noticed the coach on his cell phone all through bars rotation (L5/6) and I made sure that didn't happen the next day. Not safe coaching practice, it may be a forward roll, but it does involve little kids running at speed and a spring board.

As to floor, my kids never did more than three hour blocks and sometimes they wouldn't vault for weeks on end (12 hours a week). It wasn't ideal, but I wasn't prepared to move gyms (huge commute time) in order to change coaching. Coaches were lovely.

The hours are within the norms, certainly that level of skills here would be once a week for two hours.

 

[TexasRose]

The vault thing really makes me go EEK, no way is my kid vaulting without the coach watching. I sent one of my girls to a day gymcamp, I noticed the coach on his cell phone all through bars rotation (L5/6) and I made sure that didn't happen the next day. Not safe coaching practice, it may be a forward roll, but it does involve little kids running at speed and a spring board.

As to floor, my kids never did more than three hour blocks and sometimes they wouldn't vault for weeks on end (12 hours a week). It wasn't ideal, but I wasn't prepared to move gyms (huge commute time) in order to change coaching. Coaches were lovely.

The hours are within the norms, certainly that level of skills here would be once a week for two hours.

Bog- thank you! I'm not really that frustrated with the hours. The short hours allow us to have more family time, especially since we both work. I would prefer she do 2 days a week but I'm ok with her schedule as it is.

Yeah the vault thing has me really frustrated. It's only this 1 new coach that does that. If I notice it again I'll speak up, because like you said its a safety issue. It makes me feel better to hear that the girls don't always practice every apparatus every practice. I wasn't sure and it made me start questioning their coaching- which I don't want to do because I know nothing about coaching gym and I love the coaches. DD has a great relationship with all of them except the vault coach- he doesn't really interact with the little ones a lot. Maybe it's because he's new? I really appreciate your advice .

 

[Gymmonkeymomma]

I have pretty much decided to stay. I was really looking for some validation that staying at an so-so gym for 2 years wouldn't really hurt her in the long run because she's so young.

I read the rest of your post about your 'history' with other gym. We were in similar situation because we left our 1st gym which was 1/2 mile from home, and they pretty much blackballed us even though my kids were only 3 and 7 at the time. With that said, to spend 2 years at a so-so gym is not a bad thing as long as 1) your DD is happy and 2) the safety concerns (vault) are addressed and 3) your expectations are realistic as far as skill and progress. We have also done this (2nd gym, ended up staying over 7 years). However, at any point where your child is not happy, not safe, not progressing... AND she loves the sport enough to warrant a change, then it's time to move on! (My girls are now at 2 different gyms each 15-20 mins away in opposite directions, good thing big DD only goes 1x/wk now!)

 

[flippin out]

With that said, to spend 2 years at a so-so gym is not a bad thing as long as 1) your DD is happy and 2) the safety concerns (vault) are addressed and 3) your expectations are realistic as far as skill and progress. We have also done this (2nd gym, ended up staying over 7 years). However, at any point where your child is not happy, not safe, not progressing... AND she loves the sport enough to warrant a change, then it's time to move on!

Couldn't say it any better!