Parents New coaches/Disgruntled parents question

[Mariainlv]

Im going to add some background for my question:


So last night there was a parents meeting at the gym.

We recently had a coaching change debacle. Head coaches were replaced, new head coach was gung ho guns blazing, till he emailed the owner, a month before the season, thanks but no thanks..

Fast forward, now we have a new head coach and her husband. They are awesome!! However, our gym does not have the culture they are used to. Think foie gras vs McDonalds..

This past weekend was the first compulsory meet. They did not go. The old coaches would always go, so the parents expected that new ones to. This caused some serious angst and hard feelings.

So anyway the meeting was called to clear the air, etc.

The old coaches came to the meet to cheer the kids on and this really ruffled some feathers for the owner and some parents, while others welcomed the support.

In your opinion, is the show of support OK, or should they let the kids move on?

 

[nevertooold]

The old coaches came to the meet to cheer the kids on and this really ruffled some feathers for the owner and some parents, while others welcomed the support.

In your opinion, is the show of support OK, or should they let the kids move on?

Who invited the old coaches to the meeting??? Move on. Or are they moving to another gym and want to keep relationships open with former students for their own purposes. Not appropriate, and really none of their business.

 

[NGL780309]

Who invited the old coaches to the meeting??? Move on. Or are they moving to another gym and want to keep relationships open with former students for their own purposes. Not appropriate, and really none of their business.

She said they came to the MEET to cheer the kids on. I think that's great.

 

[sportzmomov3]

Maybe I misunderstood post, but how did the girls compete if the coaches didn't go?...and what did you mean by foie gras vs. McDonalds - which gym is which charcterization?

As for old coaches being at the meet to cheer on, seems fine to me...
Our old coaches still give my DD a "good job!" when they see her at meets. Of course we left the gym, not the coaches, but still. Unless there is some dark ulterior motive for their appearance at the meet (i.e. slyly talking to parents to recruit them over to their new place of employment) then maybe these are coaches who valued the relationship they had with their team girls? Unless of course the reason for their replacement is something that should keep them away from the girls (i.e. inappropriate conduct).

Seems there are some details missing here that might clarify the situation a bit more.

 

[gym law mom]

Just to follow up also. Do the new HCs coach the compulsory teams? Doesn't sound like it since the girls went to a meet and they didn't go. That is pretty common for HC not to go to every meet that their gym is competing at.

As for the former coaches coming to cheer on the girls, I have mixed feelings. Are these coaches at another gym or just not coaching at all? If they're not coaching anywhere, I guess its ok for them to come to 1 meet. After that it would tend to get confusing to the girls to have them showing up to support them, but not coach them on a daily basis. Could cause some issues down the line.

 

[cher062]

Ok so who went with the girls to the meet? There must have been a coach with them! It is my experience that there are coaches in charge of each level (or even a few levels) that report to HC. Those coaches that the girls work with every day are usually the ones I see go. I've only seen the HC go to the meets with the levels they directly work with on a regular basis, to sectionals and to states and even then it may only be with the levels they work with on a regular basis. in my dd's current gym the HC works with the optional girls and there are other coaches that work with the compulsory levels. She doesn't go to the compulsory meets unless she is needed to go maybe because they split the team at the meet into 2 different groups and more coaches are needed to spot etc.

As far as old coaches going to meets well it is a public event and anyone that pays the admission fee can come and watch. I don't think I've ever seen an old coach just come and sit in the bleachers with the parents unless they left right before a big meet like states and wanted to see how they did. either way no one should have ruffled feathers because someone came as a spectator to a meet regardless of if they are a former coach or not.

Most of the "old coaches" i've seen usually get a job at another gym and are at the meet with their new team.

 

[Gymdad2]

I fully agree with cher on the issue of the old coaches being at the meet. The only issue would be if they had tried to recruit any of the girls to their new team (if they had one) and there is no indication in your post that this occurred. Like cher said, it was a public event so any ruffled feathers appear to have been an over-reaction. I also agree with the others who explained that HC does not usually go to a compulsory meet unless he/she is directly involved in their training.

 

[lilgymmie7]

I for one have to say Kudos to the old HC for coming to root the girls on! The idea of having a coach get personal with my DD to want to see her succeed is a beautiful thought. I don't think the poster said anything about the old coaches being innappropriate at any point. She just wanted to know if it was okay for them to be there. I agree with the poster that said these old coaches were spectators just like anyone else. Those parents from the gym that were upset to see them there were probably only fed half of the story as to why the old coaches were replaced.
My older DD's coach was replaced by the gym owner for a silly reason that in the end back fired for her. When DD's old coach saw her at meets, he was always warm and supportive towards her. My little DD still benefits from having him as a back bone. He doesn't coach her in any way, but when we go to his gym for open gym, he always compliments her on how well she is doing. He is such a well put together, giving person. It is us who make it a point to go see his team at meets. Some of his gymnasts were old teammates of our older DD. And no, he didn't recruit them when he started up his own gym. Parents trust him and repect his coaching ideals. We love him, but his gym is too far for us and DD is in a car pool at her current gym. I can't say anything negative about her gym either, though. Perhaps the OP has a similar story.

 

[MdGymMom01]

Im going to add some background for my question:


So last night there was a parents meeting at the gym.

We recently had a coaching change debacle. Head coaches were replaced, new head coach was gung ho guns blazing, till he emailed the owner, a month before the season, thanks but no thanks..

Fast forward, now we have a new head coach and her husband. They are awesome!! However, our gym does not have the culture they are used to. Think foie gras vs McDonalds..

This past weekend was the first compulsory meet. They did not go. The old coaches would always go, so the parents expected that new ones to. This caused some serious angst and hard feelings.

So anyway the meeting was called to clear the air, etc.

The old coaches came to the meet to cheer the kids on and this really ruffled some feathers for the owner and some parents, while others welcomed the support.

In your opinion, is the show of support OK, or should they let the kids move on?

I am not totally understanding this post so it is hard for me to formulate a response. Please clarify so that we have some more background and details. From what I understand, the new coaches did not go to the meet but the old coaches went and supported the girls. Is this correct?

 

[Mariainlv]

Sorry guys, that was probably up there with the most confusing posts..


Ok, so the new coaches work mostly optionals. The old coaches did also but still went to the meets. I think that's where the parents got confused. There were coaches there, just not the head coaches.

The new coaches are very experienced and very professional. The old coaches (husband/wife as are new coaches) were very young, passionate and perhaps a little less professional. The new coaches are trying to change things, not just concrete things, but the entire culture of the gym and I think they will do a great job. As well, I think the old coaches meant well and were doing their best.

The old coaches have not landed anywhere and just came to support the kids. A select few parents felt the need to tell the owner that the old coaches bad mouthed the gym/new coaches at the meet. I wasn't there/don't know but really? Lets grow up and not spread gossip is my thought..

I intentionally did not give an opinion in the first post, but I see no problem with the old coaches attending the meet. The gym owner and some parents were really mad though.

Thanks for the feedback, good to see I'm not off in my thinking.

 

[bogwoppit]

Ah well then. It's a free world and the old coaches are entitled to go anywhere they please and cheer for whoever they like. Tough for the new coaches and owners, but that's life.

As you say, people should gossip less.

Hopefully the new coaches can do some great things at the club!

 

[nevertooold]

She said they came to the MEET to cheer the kids on. I think that's great.

SHEESH! I thought she meant that the old coaches came to a meeting at the gym to discuss why the other coaches didn't go to the meet. SORRY

As far as old coaches going to the meet, could have been innocent and supportive, but if they were bad mouthing the gym owner and new coaches well then.... not so much.

 

[Pickle's Mom]

At Pickle's gym, the head coach doesn't go to compulsory meets either. He does go to a few L6 meeets at the end of the season, since he's part of the decision of who is invited to Optionals, but that's about it. And he filled in once for a Compulsory coach who broke her leg the day before a meet.

I can see why parents might expect it if the other coach did it, but it isn't the norm.

As for the old coaches showing up to a meet, if I were the owner and I found out they had been badmouthing me, I'd have a problem with it too. But, if that didn't happen, and all they were doing was cheering on the girls, it doesn't sound like a big deal.

 

[Panda-girl's Mom]

To me it seems alittle odd that unless they were there to coach other girls that they would show up at a meet. Was it to get back at the owner. I would also think that it would only make matters worse for the kids they are probally already upset about the old coaches leaving and now they are showing up at the meet. Would that not make it harder for the girls to move on. As for the new coaches not coming I agree with the others not all coaches are going to come to every meet. Remember the coaches who are there coaching are getting paid to be there it would make no sense to expect the headcoaches to be there without getting compensated.

 

[Aussie_coach]

As bogwoppit says it is a free world and they do have a right to go and watch any competition they desire but it is not always a good idea to do so.

If these coaches have been fired there will be some hard feelings between them and the gym which never leads to the nicest and friendliest situation for the kids.

It can be upsetting for the kids too, to be there having trained under a new coach with the old coaches sitting there watching and commenting.

 

[10.0]

About the old coaches coming, I guess the hard feeling would depend on the situation and I was not there so I have no idea what it was. It would seem if they were recently departed they may feel a strong connection to the girls they worked with and really wanted to cheer them on, especially if the terms of them leaving were good. There was a time I had to stop coaching for a while and I still went and cheered my girls on, and they still loved me, they were sad when I left but happy to see me come continue to support them, I fail to see what the problem is with that. Now on the other hand if they were fired or left on bad terms and they were there with the intention of egging the gym personal and parents on that is wrong. So without that info. it is hard to form an opinion. As far as the new HC or owners whomever not attending, do you know the reason? Mayb e they could not attend this meet or maybe like many other suggested they don't attend meets of the kids they don't coach. That is actually pretty normal even if it is something the parents of your gym are not used to. Our gym is smaller so meets don't run unless the entire staff attends, but 99% of the time unless you are the coach of a kid on a certain event you would not get to watch anyways. Our HC and owner as so busy they rarely see any of the kids routines, but that is us I am guessing it is totally different if you have a larger staff and lots of parents that help, many of our coaches when not coaching their groups are doing concessions, door fees etc.