Parents Parents giving Financial Rewards for Young Atheletes

[BlairBob]

Just gonna say, athlete stipends are common in many countries at the professional level.

I bet you'd get up that rope if there was a $5 bill up there!

 

[skschlag]

Just gonna say, athlete stipends are common in many countries at the professional level.

I bet you'd get up that rope if there was a $5 bill up there!

BUt we aren't at the professional level. Our kids are kids, amateurs if you want to use that word. Professionals, by definition, get paid for the job they are doing.

 

[Natasha]

BUt we aren't at the professional level. Our kids are kids, amateurs if you want to use that word. Professionals, by definition, get paid for the job they are doing.

Yes. And professional athletes aren't getting paid by their parents, they are getting paid by the organization. I just have a hard time understanding the whole concept of paying kids to do their extracurricular activity…. And I don't pay for grades. Our kids' reward for making good grades is they get to do their extracurricular activities….

 

[BachFlyer]

what gymtigermom said

 

[Fliptwisttumble]

So one year we paid for each new skill achieved. Nothing for competing or achieving scores.

DD was very young and very undecided about her gymnastics. She had (and still has) talent but due to her age she wasn't able to focus as she could had she been older to achieve her potential. She made a whack load of money, moving through levels 5, 6 and 7 that year.

Towards the end of the year, she told me it wasn't necessary anymore. That was a year ago. The money she made still sits in her bank account unspent.

She's a different kid now. She's happy to obtain a skill and it is now it's own reward..... As it should be. But if that $300 she made over the course of a year is the difference between her being in it and loving the sport now, and having quit at some point in between, it was the best bribing I've ever done

 

[Canadian_gym_mom]

There were sisters at our old gym who would "earn" money for medals. These parents also punished and grounded for poor placements.

I disagree with this personally.

 

[raenndrops]

Ugh -- please do not bribe your kids in any fashion!!!

As a coach, I can divide the kids on the team who are bribed and those who are not (without actually knowing beforehand). The kids who receive no external incentives always out-do the kids who are paid in any form for their accomplishments. They are more level in their workouts (the bribed kids have lots of ups and downs & go through more slumps than the kids who are not). The kids who are bribed never go the extra mile the way the kids who are not bribed will.

If you were to observe our team, you would not be able to separate them into those who are bribed and those who aren't.

 

[HoldThePhone]

It really never crossed my mind to pay her for something she already loves.

In my previous job as a coach for a different sport, even for the beginner kids, we always told parents not to bribe the kids, because so many of them would actually hold back on doing something until a parent offered another reward. It's just a bad precedent to set, in my opinion.

 

[raenndrops]

Some bribed girls work really hard EVERY day and practice rep after rep and rarely get into slupms. Some of the not bribed girls are the exact same way. Other girls bribed and not bribed will have ups and downs, slack off, get into slumps, and get completely frustrated.
My gymmies HAVE been bribed... as I have stated before. And I will on occasion (if they ask on the way to a meet) agree to let them get LARGE shakes instead of MEDIUM shakes for whatever they suggest... a 9.0 or better... a skill they have been struggling with in practice... remembering to step before kicking (YG-L3 floor)... getting ANY personal best score or placement... whatever. What they don't realize is that I plan on Large every time and only get Medium if that is what they ask for.

Back when I played baseball, the assistant coach of our coach pitch team bribed us one game... $5 for each person every time they hit the pitcher (my dad) with the ball while batting. It only happened in one game because it was a BAD idea. I hit my dad, the next 3 kids hit my dad (all 4 of us were all stars too), the worst hitter on the team hit my dad, and one other kid hit him. THEN the 4 of us each hit him a few more times for good measure. That was 30 years ago last week, lol.

 

[mumoftwogymnasts]

New leotard/gym clothing for kip, based on that it is considered at our gym the first "big" skill- it was my daughters decision to wait until the kip was clean, connected and competed before she picked out a leo.
Haven't rewarded for any other skills other than a high five and a big hug, the excitement of achieving the skill is enough reward for my two.
We have a tradition of stopping for lunch or dinner out after a meet, the competing gymnast gets to choose where we eat, it is not in any way linked to results or placements as we travel for most meets and would eat anyway
In DS soccer team there was a kid that was paid $5 per goal, he openly talked about this to the other kids. DS was 9 yrs old at the time and found the whole concept ridiuculous.

 

[COz]

I think there is a big difference between a "I'm really happy that you did well and *surprise* here's an icecream/dinner out with the family/toy that I knew you wanted" type reward and the "Do well and I'll give you money" thing...

 

[3gymgirls]

No such rewards here for scores, placement, or grades. Our coach specifically advises against it and has stated that she doesn't even watch scores herself as she's typically coaching another girl. She will celebrate good routines and offer feedback right away for every routine regardless. They are also allowed to give verbal cues for every meet before the state meet as needed. That said, a gymmie on my daughter's level one team was routinely bribed before meets. Her gymnastics is good, but I don't see her staying with it long term.

 

[sce]

I bet you'd get up that rope if there was a $5 bill up there!

Our gym has recently been putting prizes at the top of the rope (taped to a nearby beam.) Just the chance of finding something makes them want to climb to the top. I see this as way differnt than paying kids for scores, medals, baskets or goals.

I also think the stipends paid by other countries is different than a parent paying a kid. These are not young kids but elite athletes and the money helps them afford continuing in the sport.

 

[iwannacoach]

what gymtigermom said

bad idea.

Please please please don't ever give your kids money for doing well in gymnastics (and honestly, I don't think it's a good idea in any sport).

Darn skippy........ And I really support this thought.........

"Gymnastics should be its own reward. If the enjoyment the sport and the pride of accomplishment are not enough motivation in and of themselves, then the kid is unlikely to stick with gymnastics for the long term anyway"

As for myself, and I imagine Geoffrey and Dunno would say the same thing, I never required any reward of any sort other than the chance to measure my ability and accomplishments in competition, and to feel the immeasurable pride in learning new skills.

Nothing can buy you that, and it disappears as soon as you pay for it.

Pizza, ice cream, or getting to choose their favorite restaurant for the next family dinner out is more than enough.

I'd like 3 scoops please.....

 

[Faith]

@BlairBob. good point.

@sce my DD is a young kid- she's 9.

In the uk we do have athlete funding. Small amounts at DD"s age. But, she did know that if she got over a certain score at regionals, she'd compete at nationals. Compete at nationals and she's eligible to apply for local funding. The amount will likely depend on how well she does, but likely to fund a couple of months fees, or the international invitational she wants to go to.

In a couple of years *if* she progresses as planned she will be eligible for lottery funding if she qualifies to a higher national squad. That's proper funding, fees will be paid.

Dh's logic when he started this is she works as hard as any professional athlete, and has no other way to earn pocket money. It isn't to motivate her, it's to give her a way to save a bit of money for new kit or whatever, rather than me forking out all the time.

I do think the point that it depends on the child is valid. I was un-bribeable as a child, if anyone tried I'd dig my stubborn little heels in and refuse point blank to do whatever, then I'd go off to a corner and get it done when no one was looking….

 

[marie83]

This is slightly off topic but just about fits in.

We have a parent at our gym who asks every session 'how has Suzie done today' her coach is very honest.

We have now noticed that if the response is negative, the mum will give an excuse 'oh well she had sports day all day' or 'oh well, yes she was up late worrying about that' etc. we have also noticed that the gymnast will be told 'if you promise to do that skill next session you can have <<insert treat>> now'

If the response is positive - no reaction what-so-ever!

Personally I think this is messed up. No wonder little Suzie won't work hard to complete her programme when she knows she gets rewarded
for not completing it! We are talking about an 8 year old here.

We also have a coach who will bribe her gymnasts with sweets or chocolate to do something. Again, I personally think this is wrong. A high five and a star on the chart should be enough in my opinion, but the little gymmies I coach think it's unfair that another group gets chocolate or sweets!

 

[TeamGram]

My DGD would get a special treat like ice cream after a good meet. She had a friend on team whose grandmother would give her granddaughter $25.00 if she beat my granddaughter. That to me is ridiculous.

 

[Gymdancer]

So I was curious and asked my daughter if she could remember getting ice cream from her coaches and how many times. She said maybe three in 11 years. But recently she told me her coach offered ice cream if she went for a skill, she did and coach ran out or was busy with other things at end of day, so no ice cream, but dd said, "Mom, it didn't matter because I went for the skill because I wanted to and would have no matter, but the ice cream was a nice thought. I didn't care whether I had any or not." I truly know that coaches are rewarding kids constantly with words of encouragement, smiles, fun time, and even with caring enough to give corrections.

I just never thought it was my place as a parent to give more than encouragement for a sport she loves. I know little about the skills anyway, and would be so out of place suggesting she do something for a reward. I'll let the rewards fall where they may. But I will say that she is very intrinsically motivated, along with many of the gymnasts I've seen over the years. But she is not beyond responding to happiness on a coach's face. And the kid loves to give or get a sincere hug!

 

[Sweet2th15]

I don't think money is the best choice to motivate an athlete. Shouldn't the achievements be there reward?

 

[windydays]

We don't reward our kids for sport stuff. We may give high-fives and say, "You have been working really hard on that. Good for you!" They really have felt their own intrinsic rewards. If they call the grandparents, grandparents may celebrate by taking them out for a yogurt. But then again, all they have to do is call the grandparents and get a yogurt anytime...

Now, taking the screens off the house, scrubbing them, and placing them back on the house - yep!