Parents Validate me, please! (illness and meets)

[rosiekat]

DS has his first meet of the season on Sunday, and yesterday (Monday) was diagnosed with flu. He is taking Tamiflu (he was in time for it) and he did get the vaccine this year - both of which, according to the doctor, should shorten the duration and severity of the illness. He is better today but still ill and running a fever, so won't make it to school tomorrow for sure. He obviously didn't go to gym last night nor will he tonight - the only other chance this week would be Thursday.

In trying to predict the future, he will likely no longer be "ill" (or contagious) by meet time. However, it is my opinion that he is 99.99% likely to still be weak and therefore potentially unsafe to compete. Everyone else seems to think I'm crazy, but I think maybe they aren't getting that I do mean honest-to-goodness influenza (tested and proven by lab) that knocks you on your butt for a while, and that they just aren't used to ever seeing him ill. (He had perfect attendance at school the last 2 years, for example.)

I have not declared an ultimatum yet (he could always suddenly get way better and make it to Thursday practice and be fine) but everyone here seems to think I'm being a pessimist. I say I'm being a realist. I don't want him to miss this meet for several reasons (one reason being that he already didn't have many meets scheduled), but it's not the Olympic trials for crying out loud! Validate me, please! (Or not, if you do disagree!)

 

[skschlag]

I think you are exactly right. He may bounce back and be ok, but odds are he will be weak and tired. I think your thinking is spot-on!

 

[2gymkids]

Last time my daughter had the flu, it was about a month before she was back to full energy, especially in the gym. Why push him if he's weak and tired? The flu can wipe you out for awhile, better to be prepared for worst case scenario.

 

[duyetanh]

Wth....these people are delusional. Keep him home.

 

[MuggleMom]

Assume and plan for the worst then be pleasantly surprised if by some miracle he gets better. If you have till Thursday to cancel on the meet I would wait till then to do it but mentally I would be preparing for no meet. I agree you are being realistic.

 

[honu]

I think you are absolutely right about being cautious. I would be worried too about him being tired, weak, or even dizzy. Gym activity and competition ready are different from feeling well enough for school or a low level activity. I've heard countless people proclaim they have the flu when what they really have is a 24 to 48 hour virus. Maybe some are not fully understanding he has (officially tested/confirmed case) of the flu. The flu is not some quick virus that you bounce back from in a day or two. Hope he feels better soon and that the medicine is a big help!

 

[rosiekat]

Wth....these people are delusional. Keep him home.

Haha, thanks for saying what I've been thinking! I know some of you have seen another post or so about this - I just felt like I was getting so much pressure from other people about it. Yes, miracles can happen, but it's just a L6 meet. Important to him but not life changing!

 

[gymnastmom05]

I will share my experience with the flu this year - my DS and I both had the flu before Christmas. (confirmed test at Dr). I did not have the flu shot this year, DS did. I did not get Tamiflu (because I really thought I just had bronchitis until it finally knocked me on my rear, so it was too late to be useful), DS did have the Tamiflu (since I knew he had been exposed, I took him as soon as he had a symptom). I was pretty much useless for a week. DS was back to normal, crazy, 8 yr old boy antics within 48 hours. So, I would just plan for the worst and hope for the best.

 

[Deleted member 18037]

One day at a time. My girl was on the podium at her state meet 4 days after the worst of flu.................. Granted it was L2. And if it wasn't states, we would not even have attempted it.

Just see how it goes

 

[Madden3]

I am with gymnastmom05 and Idw4mlo on this one. I have a similar story of miraculous recovery and my son competing very shortly after severe stomach bug. Kids can surprise you. They sometimes seem to have superhuman powers to recover from illness. Or not. It all depends.

Does the meet require travel or advance planning? Is it all off if he misses the Thursday practice? Because if logistically you can, I do not see why not take a wait and see attitude- the meet itself is still 5 days away. See how he feels the day before and talk about it with the coach. They will have warmup to observe him. Maybe he can scratch the events that would be most scary or he is not prepared to tackle due to missed week of practice.

On the one hand, these kids train all year for so few meets. It is a bummer to miss meets unless it is unavoidable. On the other hand, you are right that missing one meet is not in any way a big deal in the long run. If he is still feeling ill or weak, forget it. Explain to him the wisdom of living to fight another day.

 

[cadybearsmommy]

Bless you for keeping him at home! I've seem gym moms who have their kid at a meet or back in the gym for practice less than 24 hours after being diagnosed with the flu, strep, etc. No thought or care in the world as to how that decision affects everyone else around that child (flu outbreak at the gym anyone?) or how their child will be able to practice safely while being so sick. I know that often times it's contagious before they show symptoms and in that case you really can't help it, but sending a kid that is definitely still contagious to school, practice, etc, puts everyone at risk. This year's flu is a WHOPPER and the shot is only 10% effective, so anyone is fair game. My dd has asthma and a bad case of flu could very likely put her in the hospital. So it really does warm my heart when I hear from moms like you that do think about others and are willing to do what is best for their child, even if it's not what the child necessarily wants.

With that being said, it's possible he could compete Sunday. Even if he's not ready for practice on Thursday, he could possibly still compete. Now will it be his best meet ever? Probably not, it just depends on how weak his body is from fighting it off. Keeping lots of fluids, and especially electrolytes in him the next few days will be important. I also think it's different according to what level they are....like the pp whose daughter competed after the flu as a level 2, a level 2 that feels better, has no fever, etc but that is not quite 100% can likely compete safely. I would worry about sending a level 9-10 out to compete unless they were 100% or close to 100%.

 

[strawberries]

Of course trust your gut, the same way you would decide when to bring him in to the doc or the ER or keep him home from school. Always trust your gut. There are many reasons to keep your parent instincts intact.

That being said, you don’t have all the information today, so don’t make the decision yet. The day of the meet you will have a lot more info about how he’s doing and it makes much more sense to make the decision then. It’s like how you might plan for nasty weather b/c of the forecast and then ditch the scarf walking out the door b/c it’s sunny and warm.

 

[Mommysunshine]

I am a gym mom and a family physician. Had similar with my DD over Christmas break. Kept her out of her first meet. She was not happy that I kept her out but it was the right thing to do. She was not qite back to 100 percent. Had not been to practice in a week. I did not want to potentially expose anyone else. Felt hard at the time but now a couple weeks later it doesnt seem like it that big of a deal to miss one meet. This is her 4th year competing and really our first bout with being sick enough to miss more than one day of practice, let alone a meet.
So yes, keep him home. Let him recover. There will be more meets.

 

[jenjean70]

DS has his first meet of the season on Sunday, and yesterday (Monday) was diagnosed with flu. He is taking Tamiflu (he was in time for it) and he did get the vaccine this year - both of which, according to the doctor, should shorten the duration and severity of the illness. He is better today but still ill and running a fever, so won't make it to school tomorrow for sure. He obviously didn't go to gym last night nor will he tonight - the only other chance this week would be Thursday.

In trying to predict the future, he will likely no longer be "ill" (or contagious) by meet time. However, it is my opinion that he is 99.99% likely to still be weak and therefore potentially unsafe to compete. Everyone else seems to think I'm crazy, but I think maybe they aren't getting that I do mean honest-to-goodness influenza (tested and proven by lab) that knocks you on your butt for a while, and that they just aren't used to ever seeing him ill. (He had perfect attendance at school the last 2 years, for example.)

I have not declared an ultimatum yet (he could always suddenly get way better and make it to Thursday practice and be fine) but everyone here seems to think I'm being a pessimist. I say I'm being a realist. I don't want him to miss this meet for several reasons (one reason being that he already didn't have many meets scheduled), but it's not the Olympic trials for crying out loud! Validate me, please! (Or not, if you do disagree!)

Last year we traveled to Chicago (our first time to do the optional travel meet) and my gymnasts twin was recovering from the flu. I begged the Dr to give him tamiflu just in case and the Dr and hubby said no. The Dr said we could call it in if he gets sick while we were there and he should be fine to compete....with the FLU- What?! Anyway, he did get sick, got tamiflu and did NOT compete. He was not feeling well at all and I was not going to chance an injury over a meet. We did get a mini vacay to Chicago but no competition. Hopefully your DS feels 100% by the weekend and is able to compete. My son's competition was the day after he started the tamiflu so not enough time to feel better.

 

[Sk8ermaiden]

Yes, all you can do is wait and see. DD came down with the flu HARD. She was sicker than I've ever seen her, I was worried about what it could possibly be (meningitis?). Flu 11 pm Saturday; Tamiflu by 11 pm Sunday, fever broke Monday night, begged to go to gym Tuesday morning; I finally let her go Wednesday evening. She was more than totally recovered by then. I think it was ALL about being on the Tamiflu within 24 hours.

She also is NOT high level. I don't know how that would work. But her energy was 100%.

 

[rosiekat]

Just to answer a few questions, it does require a 3 hour drive and we'd have to stay in a hotel the night before because he has an 8 a.m. start. I don't think our gym has any official policy on scratching, I just figure if he can't at least give it a shot at practice Thursday, it's too much to cram in without knowing if he'll even be ok to compete. I *definitely* will not send him to school or gym or meet if he's still seeming at all sick or less than 24 hours post fever, etc. Having said that, he was fever free this afternoon and evening without meds, and he's actually beginning to bounce around some, though clearly not like normal. (Definitely not like me last time I had flu!) He's home from school tomorrow for sure to play it safe, then I guess we'll see. I'm beginning to think he might be the lucky one like some of your kids, but I'll just see. (Practically speaking, I suppose it also requires at least one healthy parent, which we have so far but I don't want to jinx!)

 

[rosiekat]

And just to reiterate, there is NO WAY I'm taking him around people until I'm confident he's as virus free as possible. If there's any doubt there, he's definitely not going anywhere!

 

[l.c.o]

Last spring, my DD had strep and then was immediately hit with the flu (strep fever broke, then flu fever started within like 36 hours). She was down a total of 9 days, IIRC.

She went to school on day 10, and then tried to go back to practice - she’d looked so much better to us, but they sent her straight home (!) because she looked so awful.

Took her a week or two to get close to full strength. Somewhere in those couple of weeks she competed regionals and did OK... though it wasn’t amazing.

That said, each kid is different! Your kiddo may surprise you - I hope he does.

 

[SurpriseGymMom]

I think a lot of that is totally individual. Some kids would be fine to compete if they were feeling better, and some kids would not. A lot depends on level and scariness of skills.... I wouldn’t hesitate to make a L2 or 3 compete, but I would be wary to let a L9 do it, KWIM?

At our gym it would be a moot point. If you miss most of the week leading up to a meet, you’re not competing.

 

[duyetanh]

I think a lot of that is totally individual. Some kids would be fine to compete if they were feeling better, and some kids would not. A lot depends on level and scariness of skills.... I wouldn’t hesitate to make a L2 or 3 compete, but I would be wary to let a L9 do it, KWIM?

At our gym it would be a moot point. If you miss most of the week leading up to a meet, you’re not competing.

This. Our coaches would not let our girls compete either if you are missing practice during meet week. It's honestly a safety issue. Even at level 2, kids can and do get hurt....but the higher level, the bigger the risk. For us, the risk does not equal the reward. And even if they feel fine, their body has taken a beating. Which is why I am glad the coaches call the shots, this way I am not mean old mommy denying her from comps....