Parents forced a gym switch -are they happy?

[SHELOVESGYM]

I have posted previously about my parental guilt about moving DD to a new gym. She does not want to leave her friends -so it's tough to force this on her but I KNOW it's the right decision. If you moved your gymmie against their will how did the adjustment go? Were they happy in the end? How long did it take for them to start liking the new gym?

 

[MILgymFAM]

I've moved my ODD against her will 3 times. Every time she has adjusted, and neither of us regret any of those moves. Once was for what I perceived as a safety issue, once due to emotional abuse, and this last time I forced her to switch out of artistic altogether. Even the last one she has adjusted to.

My YDD I forced to switch once as well. She was deeply unhappy but couldn't make that leap on her own. She's so glad I forced the issue now that she's settled- and the settling took far less time than either of us thought it would. Kids are resilient and sometimes we have to put our foot down and do what we think is in their best interest.

 

[beachgirl]

Mine is 18 months in the new gym. She wishes she would have switched earlier. The initial switch was very hard, but after just a few days I could see the change in her and after a few months it was like the old gym never existed.

 

[momto2js]

I explained that there were some adult problems at the old gym (my son had 14 coaches in 3 years) and I needed to make an adult decision to find a place that was a better fit for our family right now. I had him work out at 2 options and considered his input in making the final call. He called the new gym home almost immediately.

 

[Deleted member 18037]

We changed when my daughter was 7. She was miserable about it. Cried, begged and bargained not to change. I feared I was scarring her for life. Had to be done.

Cried for 3 solid hours until she fell asleep the night before her first practice at the new gym. Went begrudgingly the first 2 weeks. Professed the gym smelled (as in bad). It didn't smell bad, it did smell different. At around a month she was liking it, making new friends, and was clearly getting better at her gymnastics.

By 12 weeks, it was Christmas, her first Team Party, and a couple of meets under her belt and she was fine.

It is now going on her 4th yr out. She loves her gymmie friends. Her closest friend from the old gym followed us here. And there is still another friend that she misses. There is just no time to get together. She understands that and still misses her friend. These things are a part of life.

 

[GymDad9.9]

We changed when my daughter was 7. She was miserable about it. Cried, begged and bargained not to change. I feared I was scarring her for life. Had to be done.

Cried for 3 solid hours until she fell asleep the night before her first practice at the new gym. Went begrudgingly the first 2 weeks. Professed the gym smelled (as in bad). It didn't smell bad, it did smell different. At around a month she was liking it, making new friends, and was clearly getting better at her gymnastics.

By 12 weeks, it was Christmas, her first Team Party, and a couple of meets under her belt and she was fine.

It is now going on her 4th yr out. She loves her gymmie friends. Her closest friend from the old gym followed us here. And there is still another friend that she misses. There is just no time to get together. She understands that and still misses her friend. These things are a part of life.

Does the gym still smell different?

 

[Deleted member 18037]

Does the gym still smell different?

She was over that by Christmas too It just smells like "the gym"

 

[scgymmom322]

I forced a gym switch on my two daughters 8 months ago. One was almost 5 and one was 7. Both were in development groups-the 7 year old was going to be moved up to level 3 soon, and the 5 year old was supposed to move up to the next development group the day after we left. My 5 year old had an amazing coach, who she had been with for two years-all of her gym career besides the single month she spent in rec. Her coach was leaving our gym and she was literally the only reason we were there. As soon as I knew she was leaving, I knew we were leaving, too. Unfortunately, we couldn't follow her, but a gym change had to be made. We weren't happy with the coaching my 7 year old was getting, the owner was extremely difficult and stressful to deal with, and they wanted my 4 year old to move up to 12 hours! The girls did not know that we were even switching gyms--the old gym owner would have made all of our lives completely miserable--we just left one day and never went back. Our old gym was only 15 minutes away, and our new one is 45, but still worth it!

Both girls cried and cried about leaving the gym, but my 7 year old was in love with her new gym after her very first practice. She missed her friends, but even she could tell an immediate difference in coaching! She made new friends quickly and has an amazing group of girls on her team! Her skill level has increased drastically since we left, and I am so proud of how much she has grown. There is no question in my mind that this was the right move for her.

My now 5 year old still cries daily about missing her old coach. Her coach is no longer at the gym we were at, and isn't at a gym we can go to, so I think whether we had stayed at the old gym or moved, she would still be feeling this way. My daughter is excited each day to go to gym, but talks constantly about how much she misses her old coach. I don't love the program that my 5 year old is in at the moment, but I know that it is better than what she would have had at our old gym. She is only 5, so she will be fine. I am looking forward to move-ups in a few months so that she will be with my older daughters coaches, who are great!

Overall, I know we made the right decision to switch gyms. I have never doubted moving gyms, and even though there are some things I don't love at the new gym, I am very happy with our decision.

 

[gymbeam]

I initiated a switch when my daughter was 9. She was very nervous about it and initially said she did not want to switch. However, once she saw what the girls in the new gym were doing compared to the old gym she was on board.

 

[glad2bgymmom]

I posted a very similar question back in early September. I had so many reasons for moving my daughter from one gym to another, but she did not want to move. She was pretty upset the first week and resigned the second week. By the end of the month, she even realized the move was a good thing. She is much happier now. Although the gym move was tough, it was worth it. Good luck to you and your daughter.

 

[SHELOVESGYM]

I posted a very similar question back in early September. I had so many reasons for moving my daughter from one gym to another, but she did not want to move. She was pretty upset the first week and resigned the second week. By the end of the month, she even realized the move was a good thing. She is much happier now. Although the gym move was tough, it was worth it. Good luck to you and your daughter.

This and all of the other replies are so encouraging. Thanks to everyone who has responded to this thread. Do you remember the title of the thread you posted? I would like to find it. Thanks!

 

[MaryA]

Yes, was happy almost immediately. She was 10 and made friends quickly. It would be harder to move her now at 15.

 

[JoyAvenueMom]

The older they are the harder it is. At 8 years old, I just told her "you are switching". She cried for hours, and I felt horrible. After 2 practices at the new gym she told me it was the right thing to do. Now that she is 12, it would be very hard to move unless she was on board. I understand how sometimes it must be done regardless, but so much harder when they "own" their gymnastics and have strong bonds.

 

[SHELOVESGYM]

Should she be aware that she's there for her last practice? Or do we leave for our one week trip and not go back to old gym?

 

[Deleted member 18037]

I told my daughter we were thinking about changing so it wouldn't come out of left field. But I didn't tell her it was a done deal until after her last practice.

 

[txgymfan]

Should she be aware that she's there for her last practice? Or do we leave for our one week trip and not go back to old gym?

Nope! Have her clean out anything normally left at the gym to be cleaned and tell her after you leave, whenever and whenever she is most receptive to talking and listening.

 

[MILgymFAM]

Should she be aware that she's there for her last practice? Or do we leave for our one week trip and not go back to old gym?

We've always made sure DD had her grips before leaving the last practice, even if she didn't know it was her last practice. For one gym switch we actually timed her leaving with the last meet because meets were the only time girls would take their grips home and not cause suspicion. Other things have been left behind accidentally and we just let them go. They were little things like weights and bands. I felt the cost of replacing them was worth not having a scene to go back and get them.

 

[momto2js]

Nope, "make sure you have your stuff tonight". The day before the first workout at the new gym tell her. Also be prepared to pay for a month at the old gym, your 30 day notice, and a month at the new gym. Under no circumstances is it a good idea to give notice and then send your kid back to the old gym, short of you are moving far far away for a reason other than gym.

 

[Mommyo2az]

We are 6 months post parent initiated gym switch. Old gym was fraught with safety issues, 16 year olds coaching team, and a host of other issues. I took DD for a trial at another gym - and she immediately knew she needed to leave. Sadly all hell broke loose at old gym so DD was kicked out and never got to say goodbye.
All is well though - she made friends quickly and instead of repeating lvl 4 she will be competing lvl 6!

 

[glad2bgymmom]

This and all of the other replies are so encouraging. Thanks to everyone who has responded to this thread. Do you remember the title of the thread you posted? I would like to find it. Thanks!

I guess my question was a little different, but it was called "Adjusting to New Gym".