Women How to improve work ethic in my athletes?

[CanGymCoach]

I've started coaching a new group of girls this year and they just have terrible work ethic from having coaches that don't care in the past. They lay down between their turns, spend forever getting chalk or just standing on the beam watching the rec groups for up to 5 minutes before taking turns. I've gotten mad at them, threatened with and gave them rope climbs, set up more stations, told them to 'go join the rec group if thats were you want to be' and even banned one kid from the chalk because she just plays in it (and she's almost 11). They've improved a bit, but I am at my wits end right now. I'd be very grateful for any ideas on dealing with this! Thanks

 

[gymdog]

Have you tried a structure where everyone works at the same time rather than using more stations? I know everyone loves stations, and I love stations in theory too. But I also take all who come who can be gymnasts, whether they have ADHD or whatever or not, and the structure of stations does not really work for our team generally. Instead I tend to do a structure where everyone is working on the same specific thing at the same time with very specific cues and instructions. If I don't have enough of the setup, they work with partners and have a specific responsibility to their partner such as counting for their partner or checking their partner for whatever form aspect the drill is intended to achieve. This way they never have any downtime and are always responsible to someone if I am working with someone else. Obviously that would be for something that is safe for them to work on, such as split jumps for compulsories.

I use stations sometimes, in some areas. But when I do, typically the kids stay at their station and work on it repeatedly until I tell them to move to the next one. This solves the issue of them running through the station without really doing it and allows me to work with each kid at each station for at least a minute or two. I don't really have a laying down issue (we have kind of the opposite), but do have other behaviors that relate to not attending to the task at hand (jumping, climbing, doing another skill) and it is best solved by giving the child a responsibility to do at that time (as I said before, count for their partner). They can rotate through the stations with a partner.

Also give them a task or challenge or number of something they are trying to achieve, such as making ten of something or whatever. If they do that they will earn a privilege such as being able to work on an upgrade at that station for the next level. Then let them know if the rotation gets out of control the rotation will pause and be "frozen" for 30 seconds at first, then one minute, etc. Remind them this will lose their time to earn their privilege and they should work together as a team so this does not happen.

If they are 10 this is very fixable by implementing the right structure to practice.

 

[Deleted member D3987]

this is one of those times where the parents may have to get involved. i agree with Gymdog also.

in my travels doing clinics and such i have seen what you are talking about. it's not only disrespectful to the coach and teammates but also disrespectful to the sport of gymnastics.

often i find out their behavior has been long standing and the coach(es) are working toward breaking that pattern. and for the exact same reason you just stated "from coaches that don't care in the past".

i've seen it so bad, like laying around on the floor, or drama landings where they lay there and look like they are modeling, etc; excessive talking, chalking over and over, backs turned to the coach and event, and on and on.

this may be one of those times that you will have to send a note to the parents and appeal to their sensibilities on how they want their kids to behave and represent themselves in the sport of gymnastics.

most parents just won't put up with what you have described.

 

[Redford]

Gymdog has given you some great advice.
You will have to be careful with who you pair up though.
Also, if someone lies down various times don't just threaten. Take a mat and put it somwhere where it's not in somebodies way. Tell the gymnast to lie down and wish her a very good rest. Walk away and continue working with those who are willing to do so. If she gets up, send her back to her "bed" until she gets the point. If she doesn't have a talk with her in private and ask her why she goes to gym in the first place. Maybe competitive gymnastics isn't actually her thing.
There are lots of possibilities of this kind. Someone is playing with chalk? Get her a sheet of paper and some coloured pencils! Alternativly you can send her to count foam blocks! Someone spends hours watching the rec kids? Let her stand on the side and give her some spyglasses so she can watch better. Can you talk with the rec coach and actually send her one of your gymnasts if they are not behaving like a team gymnast should behave?

 

[B.Gold]

this may be one of those times that you will have to send a note to the parents and appeal to their sensibilities on how they want their kids to behave and represent themselves in the sport of gymnastics.

most parents just won't put up with what you have described.

Please explain what a parent can do sitting in our living rooms, other than back up any disciplinary action a coach might take, or pulling our kids altogether.

I know how I want my kid to behave, and I know how I would firmly correct her behavior if I were there. And trust me, I'd be effective. But I can't effectively discipline my kid from miles away. I'm counting on you to do that. And then I'll back you up.

 

[coachmolly]

Please explain what a parent can do sitting in our living rooms, other than back up any disciplinary action a coach might take, or pulling our kids altogether.

I know how I want my kid to behave, and I know how I would firmly correct her behavior if I were there. And trust me, I'd be effective. But I can't effectively discipline my kid from miles away. I'm counting on you to do that. And then I'll back you up.

It's not about disciplining the child from miles away, or sitting in the gym waiting to step in if your child acts up. But laying out expectations for your child before hand. Letting them know they are to be respectful of their coach, and exactly how that should look (looking at coach when he/she is speaking, following directions, working to the best of their ability) as well as what the consequences are for when the coach reports back to the parent that their where problems in the gym. Also, keeping an open line of communication with the coach if you know your child is prone to certain behaviors in the gym and give them ideas on how to deal with those behaviors (sitting out is a great solution for some kids, for others it just exacerbates the problem).

As for the OP's gymnasts, I have some groups who have gone through spells of similar struggles. If it is a safety issue, I tell them they need to get down or sit out until they are ready to focus on what they are doing because I am not willing to see them get hurt. If they pop up for their next turn I let them give it a go, and if they continue to be sloppy or lacking focus, I tell them to get down and repeat myself. At least for my kids, this usually works.
For some kids, if the behavior is not safety related, I will sometimes just let them go and ignore it. When they realize they aren't getting attention for acting out, they get back to what everyone else is doing and I start working with them again.
I also try to give lots of praise to kids who are following directions, listening, working their hardest so the others can see that you get attention by being hard working and respectful.
I also try to remove distractions as much as possible. While this is impossible for distractions like rec. classes, it can be done with mats the kids like to play on (for us the round bhs mats are a HUGE distraction) or other odds and ends that can be found around the gym. Though this is more a problem with my 5-7 year olds than my 8-12 year olds. And like gymdog, I have more overly active kids who race through everything and jump around during instructions than kids with lie around or take extended breaks.
For my pre-team kids (ages 7-12), I have on occasion sat them down and talked with them about behavior expectations and consequences for not behaving appropriately.
All kids are different, and sometimes it takes different steps to get all kids to respond. But I've found that once you get the majority of kids on board, the remaining few will either shape up or see themselves out.

 

[Deleted member D3987]

Please explain what a parent can do sitting in our living rooms, other than back up any disciplinary action a coach might take, or pulling our kids altogether.

I know how I want my kid to behave, and I know how I would firmly correct her behavior if I were there. And trust me, I'd be effective. But I can't effectively discipline my kid from miles away. I'm counting on you to do that. And then I'll back you up.

i understand you can't see this from where you sit. but the note and possible meeting would be to facilitate precisely what you have stated which i have put in bold.

as i stated, i have seen some pretty bad programs from a behavioral point of view. sometimes the coach will have to solicit the help from the parent.

and again, for the reason you stated. more often than not, and you can see this here at CB, coaches sometimes fly by the seat of their pants and are inconsistent in what they do and pretty much piss off parents all over.

if the coach and the parent sit down and see eye to eye about what the coach is seeing, the coach needs to know that they DO have your support and that you won't go whining to the owner and possibly get them fired if they follow thru on a course of discipline that both parties agree to. this is a huge problem in our industry and many here will confirm that truth.

 

[gracyomalley]

I do think parents can make a difference (at least I hope). My 10 year old boy is a goof ball much of the time - and my kids are level 6-8 so I am long past the point of watching practices often. I do, however, check in with coaches frequently about his behavior, stay until practice starts rather than just drop off (his sister starts 30 minutes before the boys do - he can get into lots of stuff in that time - generally harmless, but I figure I'm giving him the message that I'm ON HIM....) Whatever the coach tells me about my kids behavior, I try to support them...I expect them to be working hard, being respectful, kind, etc - or not be there.

I also know what happens when parents don't back up the coach - as there is an almost 12 year old girl on the team who is rude, pushes kids off beams and other equipment, calls girls fat, walks under the higher level boys while they are doing high bar and gives them dirty looks when they get miffed because they have to stop their release moves to avoid hurting her, etc. She has been this way for years (she's one of the reasons DD stayed away from this gym in the past, honestly), and there have been many complaints, and coach meetings, etc. She's a reasonably good gymnast, and fearless (obviously) but no future Olympian - and she's made other good gymnasts quit, or hold back, etc....I know the HC has tried repeatedly to hold her accountable, and basically the parents of the other upper level girls REQUIRE our girls to treat her with respect and kindness - but we no longer encourage them to try to befriend her, work with her, etc....

She is a distraction to most of the girls in her age group (the high school girls have simply learned to completely ignore her), and often makes or breaks work outs for them. I fully believe in giving kids a chance. I know from having 3 kids and being a pediatrician that many kids lack in social skills and that if parents don't reinforce boundaries at a young age, its hard for a kid to learn them sometimes....I know that on and off its one of my kids pushing the limits - but I try to catch it and get them through it....make them apologize to the coach, teammates for being distracting, etc. (usually playing too much for the youngest and worrying too much for the middle)...Most of the team just wishes she would move....which is a sad statement.

So, do please set standards that parents can help kids stick with - MOST of the team/parents will rise to it if you point out the goals that will be reached sooner with stricter practices, etc. Consequences can be creative (like the nap on the mat) and work outs tailored to keep the distracted kids more focused - but if you don't do it now, then the kids who want to really learn something will get lost in the mess.

 

[profmom]

If a coach ever told me my kid was screwing around in practice, I'd come down on him/her so hard with both feet s/he wouldn't know what happened. I and the other parents are paying too much money for them to be disrupting workouts and interfering with other kids' progress. If they don't want to be putting their full effort into gym, there's laundry and cleaning and all kinds of other productive things they can be doing at home.

 

[myliljunebugs]

My DD is one of the younger in her group and so therefore her coaches would tend to baby her a bit. She is also a bit flighty, but can control it when needed. But because they were babying her she would go off in lala land a LOT. I came down pretty hard on her (it was affecting her gymnastics and to a point everyone else because they would have to call her name several times to get her attention for her turn on an apparatus, so others were having to wait even longer for their turn). Between the coaches and I, we decided that if they had to call her name at all to remind her that it was her turn she would have to do 10 pushups every time at the end of practice. She stays focused now (and she's a lot stronger LOL). Parents CAN help without even being there just by supporting the coaches and letting the kids know that they are the boss when mom isn't around. Sometimes kids need to hear that specifically. Even if they aren't a "bad" kid.

 

[samsmama]

If a coach ever told me my kid was screwing around in practice, I'd come down on him/her so hard with both feet s/he wouldn't know what happened. I and the other parents are paying too much money for them to be disrupting workouts and interfering with other kids' progress. If they don't want to be putting their full effort into gym, there's laundry and cleaning and all kinds of other productive things they can be doing at home.

Yes, this!

I deal with the other side of this with DD's tennis lessons. The poorly behaved kids are really frustrating to DD and to me because she isn't getting as much quality instruction as she should because the coaches are dealing with these kids. The worst part is that the parents are usually there and know full well how their kids are acting. This is a "high performance" program and really expensive. I am about to say something to the coach, he is not a pushover at all, so I am guessing management is preventing him from kicking these kids out.

We don't have this issue in gym, fortunately. We got a new teammate a few months ago who was goofing around a lot and DS and his team just ignored it until this boy finally stopped because he wasn't getting a response.

 

[lovemygymnast]

At my DD's gym, that make them sit out if they aren't trying or aren't doing what they're supposed to. That's a HUGE punishment to my dd. She isn't one to goof around or not pay attention but there are certain girls who gab a lot. Although, I've never seen any of them do anything like you describe. I can't imagine having to deal with that as a coach. Do any of the parents stay to watch? Because as a parent paying A LOT of money, that just would not fly with me! I don't stay to watch but I do catch the last 15-30 minutes when I'm picking up & if I witnessed my dd being that disrespectful, I would handle it without a coach having to ask.

 

[skschlag]

Parents have a huge influene on this.. I was just talking to a parent today as our boys are being a bit difficult. We talked about the behavior, and how we are talking ot the boys. Then we started talking about gym clothes. Our boys have started wearing tshirts. (I see them wrappign around the bar, they come over their heads, etc). I have told D that if he is going to do gym, he is going to wear gym clothes. This parent, though, said, well, coach will have to enforce that if he wants them to wear compression shirts. I said, no! M son does not do gym unless he is dressed for gym Parents do have a lot of say in this.