WAG Judgement from others

[gymmee mumme]

Hi, Im new here, another parent put me on to this site so here I am. I just had another horrified and judging look from a parent when she saw my daughter training. The coaches were doing stretching with the girls and particular the back and shoulders whilst they were in the splits. My daughter is six years old and in IDP 1 and trains around 9-12 hours a week. I get the same look from other parents when they find out how many hours she is doing and have been told off by a teacher at school once and her Ballet teacher. How to I explain to them that's its ok, you cant make a six year old train like that if they dont want to and that elite training is pretty tough without looking like an Abbey Lee dance mum or a mental parent who is allowing their kid to get abused?

 

[Dr Maleficent]

It used to bother me too. Now I just smile knowingly and say "well, better he spends his time doing that than playing video games"

 

[kandkfunk]

And, it's the cheapest baby sitter you'll ever find. Especially when they are a teenager

You'll get used to it and you eventually won't care. I learned to just state my DD's schedule matter-of-factly, in a way that did not invite comment. And if someone still chose to comment or ask questions, my go to explanation is that it's a safety issue. The level of difficulty mandates the schedule. Most people don't question beyond that.

 

[BlairBob]

Just say my kid is gonna get hecka SWOLE and cut.

Jacked and Tan, Jacked and Tan!

 

[Dka]

It's funny you write this.. Another sports parent said the same thing to me, that I was pushing her and she needs to be a kid. My response to this football dad, was .. In our state to do decently well at highschool( ie: varsity letter) the girls need to go atleast 12-20 hours a week since the time they were 10. If you even think you can compete at div 1 you are talking 20-30 hours a week from about age 12...I tried to explain that it was four sports in one and they spend an hour or more of conditioning each day... I think non gym parents think we are crazy! my dd is a fifth grade level 8, and is loving every minute of her school straight to gym schedule.....

 

[gymmee mumme]

Just say my kid is gonna get hecka SWOLE and cut.

Jacked and Tan, Jacked and Tan!

Thanks Blair Bob, I have no Idea what this means but Im sure its positive lol

 

[Jenny]

It's funny you write this.. Another sports parent said the same thing to me, that I was pushing her and she needs to be a kid. My response to this football dad, was .. In our state to do decently well at highschool( ie: varsity letter) the girls need to go atleast 12-20 hours a week since the time they were 10. If you even think you can compete at div 1 you are talking 20-30 hours a week from about age 12...I tried to explain that it was four sports in one and they spend an hour or more of conditioning each day... I think non gym parents think we are crazy! my dd is a fifth grade level 8, and is loving every minute of her school straight to gym schedule.....

wow that seems so over the top compared to here. Yes gymnasts do a lot here but most other sports don't. 20 - 30 hours from the age of 12? That is one hard core state you live in.

 

[gymmee mumme]

My DD just mucking around at home sits in the splits between the chairs and leaps of the sofa so If she wasnt at Gym, could you just imagine what would happen! We'd be in the ER every second say lol

 

[Terry]

Hi, Im new here, another parent put me on to this site so here I am. I just had another horrified and judging look from a parent when she saw my daughter training. The coaches were doing stretching with the girls and particular the back and shoulders whilst they were in the splits. My daughter is six years old and in IDP 1 and trains around 9-12 hours a week. I get the same look from other parents when they find out how many hours she is doing and have been told off by a teacher at school once and her Ballet teacher. How to I explain to them that's its ok, you cant make a six year old train like that if they dont want to and that elite training is pretty tough without looking like an Abbey Lee dance mum or a mental parent who is allowing their kid to get abused?

You need to learn to basically ignore that sort of judgment. People who achieve greatness in this sport train very long and very hard and do not worry about what other people think. (this is not so different from people who achieve greatness in anything)

 

[gymmee mumme]

wow that seems so over the top compared to here. Yes gymnasts do a lot here but most other sports don't. 20 - 30 hours from the age of 12? That is one hard core state you live in.

I think thats about right I think here in the IDP program they are looking at 30+ hours by that age but by then they are going to the Australian Institute of Sport instead of a regular school

 

[EastCoastGymMom]

I usually don't tell people the hours my dd trains at the gym. It's really not that many for her level anyway, compared to other gyms, but people still seem shocked. Instead I say she goes 3-4 days a week and that doesn't seem so crazy to them. When pushed further, I will tell them that there is also a lot of standing around in line, stretching, warm up, watching demonstrations, rotating to other events, etc...

 

[ladybird]

I am betting the same people that stand in judgment also watch the Olympics and love it when we have successful gymnasts on the podium. Well guess what, this is how they are made!

 

[Terry]

I am betting the same people that stand in judgment also watch the Olympics and love it when we have successful gymnasts on the podium. Well guess what, this is how they are made!

my point exactly.

 

[Fliptwisttumble]

I get looks, I get scolded by family, people think I'm nuts to let DD do what she does. Then I show them a video of what she is capable of. More often than not, they shut up. They had no idea and assume she's doing headstands and somersaults for that many hours.

 

[cbifoja]

I refuse to minimize my daughter's dedication to this sport. If someone tries to criticize the choices that she makes and I support, I can shut it down very quickly.

If someone talks about her having a "normal" childhood, I can counter with she is having a "special" childhood. If someone talks about her being a normal kid, I can counter with normal these days equals lots of screen time so no thank you. Why take "normal" when you can have extraordinary??? These kids are extraordinary!

When she becomes a teenager, I pray to every deity known to man that she is very much abnormal. I teach teenagers. I know what "normal" means. Again, no thank you.

 

[BlairBob]

SWOLE as in swollen. Big muscles.

Jacked as in shredded as in rippling muscles while lean. 6 pack abs, guns for biceps and traps like a bull neck.

Tanned as in bodybuilders who love getting tanned.

Basically it's something to just ridicule other parents and that teacher.

 

[GYM0M]

So sorry you are experiencing these issues. I would love to tell you this is as bad as it gets, but sometimes it gets much worse. My 6 yr old worked out 18 hours a week during 1st grade, 27 hours per week over the summer, and now, as a 7 year old works out 22.5 hours on top of going to public school. I get the looks, too! If someone says something, I usually just say something like "We follow her lead. If she wants it, she does it. If she doesn't, we don't." I feel that her gymnastics has given her a great amount of maturity and I trust her to make her own decisions about training.

 

[rjb123]

You know, as soon as you get pregnant, have a baby or adopt a child you get judged. Bottle or breast. Working or staying home. Private or public or home schooling. Helicopter or free range parenting. IMO it comes with having kids. As far as gym, I don't really give a hoot what other people think- if they were not making comments about the hours she spends at gymnastics, they would make them about something else! I also don't really share with people who are not close friends the number of hours that DD is at gym (around 18). They probably WOULD think I am nuts! Heck, "I" think I am nuts for letting her do this at times!! Close friends are aware, and are supportive. They also know my DD well and understand that SHE is the one driving this bus, not me. They are also able to see the many positive benefits that gym has had for her.

 

[berrisweetness]

What does IDP stand for?

 

[Dka]

Cbi - I teach teenagers too.... I hope my daughter is still going 25 hours a week when she is in HS I will have a Lot less to worry about!