WAG Normal coaching behavior at meets

[bogwoppit]

A very good question and one I have asked myself many, many times.

 

[Seeker]

Maybe a good opportunity to talk to your daughter about the fact that just because someone is a grown up doesn't mean they always make good choices or do the right thing. Encourage her to work hard and listen to her coach.

ETA: just so it's clear -- listen to the coach she works with daily

 

[iwannacoach]

Here's the deal.......

Pointing toes and keeping legs straight is a matter of choice....period!!! I had lousy leg form in high school and on a national scale was closer to the bottom than the top. I fixed that upon going to college and having the coach tell me he'd send me home if I bent my legs, hooked my toes, or let my legs separate.

He explained that violating the perfect form rule was an indication of not "caring" or fatigue, and in either case the best place for me was anywhere but the gym. He told me the skills weren't important and missing any or all of them was just fine as long as I had perfect form. So guess what...... I got it, and after missing many skills the first week I found that during the third week all my skills were easier than ever.

That year I went from the bottom half of all high school seniors to the top group of all collegiate gymnasts in the country.

It's that important.......

 

[MILgymFAM]

Taking it off topic slightly, but it's presumption to assume that bent knees are a choice. My DD is physically incapable of completely straightening her legs- well, she is straightening them but they look bent anyway. I am not saying that's the case for the OP, but it's not always "fixable".

As for the original problem- what does kicking a girl out of the meet after the event in question (bars) solve? I could understand not allowing her to compete that event (maybe) but why take away the other events?

 

[gymdog]

Yes, I have been warned by others (even Dunno knows him) that he can be verbally abusive but I have not seen that side of him until now. He is very good at hiding it.

Hold on. This is the relevant information.

 

[bogwoppit]

Hold on. This is the relevant information.

My point exactly. This has nothing to do with bent legs and pointed toes.

 

[Deleted member 14190]

Coachp I've been on this board long enough to know how much you love to play devil's advocate. Of course I don't know the exact words that were said. However, I did sit at the judges table to time for another session at this meet and heard him make similar threats to other gymnasts that he coaches everyday. He is also notorious for not allowing his level 9s and 10s compete if they are even a minute later than 30 minutes early to a meet. Perhaps he realized that it wasn't his place to make the threat and decided not to follow through. And, yes, of course I know that bent legs need to be dealt with but not at a meet! I'm starting to sound like a broken record...

So you only want people to respond that agree with you? As for me, I don't play, everything I post here is an attempt to help and possibly dig for info. I always 100 percent have the best interest of the child in mind. Best of luck to your child.

 

[curlymomof3]

No, I don't mind if people disagree with me. Perhaps my attack was out of line and for that I apologize. It has been a long weekend of reassuring Dd that she is an amazing gymnast despite the HC's comments. So to hear someone justifying his actions kind of struck a nerve. I just think that sometimes coaches don't realize the power of their words on these little girls. Thank you for the good luck wishes! At this point, I am just working on getting Dd to her next practice with this coach. Baby steps...

 

[Seeker]

So you only want people to respond that agree with you? As for me, I don't play, everything I post here is an attempt to help and possibly dig for info. I always 100 percent have the best interest of the child in mind. Best of luck to your child.

...and that is the key there -- you (and many other coaches here) do have the child in mind, but there are a lot that don't. Not even close. So while it is important for parents to be sure we have the full story, it's also important to know who you're dealing with...sounds like she does though.

 

[Uglybetty]

I'm not experienced enough to advise the OP, but I wanted to say to the coaches (although you probably know this anyway) that coaching behaviour at meets can lose you gymnasts. Several times over the last year I have heard "new" parents at my DD's gym cite the negative behaviour of their old coaches/positive nature of our coaches at meets as part of the reason they decided to move to our gym. Parents viewing a meet notice this stuff. Often this will be a low level gymnast and I can well imagine the badly behaving coaches think "who cares". Most recently however our gyms positive coaching at meets was mentioned by the family of a neighbouring gyms top elite gymnast (and I mean elite not elite path) who has decided to move to us.

 

[GlobalNomad]

If they are not hitting a certain skill, I've seen kids get scratched from an event. I've also seen scratching an event used in a threatening or punishing manner, as in: "If that's the best vault you can do in practice, you're not vaulting at the next meet." I don't know if it's normal, or if it's effective for the majority of kids. It's not a good tactic for my kid.

I do wish there was a completely anonymous way for parents and gymnasts to comment on particular gyms and coaches. It would be good to know which specific gyms and coaches do these things.

 

[Deleted member D3987]

Hi all,
My Dd had her first optional meet a few days ago. Her normal coach was there as well as the head coach who never works with her. She is still a little weak on bars due to bent legs and is working to improve. During warm-up on bars, the HC noticed her bent legs and told her he would throw her out of the rest of the meet if they were bent when she competed. Of course she was a little shaken up by this and it got in her head, causing her to perform poorly on both bars and her last event, beam. She told me she was so worried about making the HC upset that she just wanted to get off the floor and is scared to work with him in the future. Is this normal optional coach behavior? I expected the expectations to be higher but my gut tells me this is not acceptable. I did email the HC about my concerns and he says he doesn't recall saying that to Dd . What do you think?

ummm....YIKES...stooooooooooooooooopid coach...............

 

[profmom]

If you are kind of stuck with this gym, I wonder if talking to the coach directly would help. We had a coach for two years who at times did not handle giving negative feedback well. Individual parents talked with him a few times about this and explained the impact on the boys, and he did improve (though he would sometimes backslide and need another intervention). He loved and believed in his athletes, but was not always great at letting them know that, so it was just a matter of encouraging him to let those messages come through too. I suggest this because your coach has indicated that he wants to work on this and be a better coach.

Definitely something to watch for the future.

 

[CanAmGymMum]

Pointing toes and keeping legs straight is a matter of choice....period!!!

I agree with this 100%. And, this is something that should continuously addressed in practice. I always tell my gymnasts, if they're not willing to put forth the effort in practice, then don't expect miracles at a meet. And, there's a good chance that if they decide to straighten their legs for the first time at a meet, they'll make a mistake because straight legs could change the timing of the skill. If this gymnast's routine wasn't up to club standards to compete, then she should have been told ahead of time that she would not be competing bars. To threaten a gymnast at a meet, who clearly wasn't aware of the criteria, serves no purpose other than to humiliate the gymnast. There are circumstances in which I would scratch a gymnast. However, warming up similar to what she does in practice everyday, after been cleared to compete, would not be one of them.

 

[CanAmGymMum]

after being cleared to compete...couldn't edit

 

[aerials]

My point exactly. This has nothing to do with bent legs and pointed toes.

Exactly. Those only talking about point toes and bent legs are missing the point. (no pun intended )

 

[curlymomof3]

Just an update! I emailed the HC about our concerns and things have improved a lot since then! Dd had another meet last weekend and it was like he was a different coach! I could tell he was really trying and Dd's performance definitely reflected it. Apparently he has been a lot more positive at practice too; so much so that Dd told me I need to email him and tell him what a fantastic coach he is ! Hopefully it continues!!