What goes through parents minds when letting their kids trash the gym?

[aerialriver]

Mostly a question for parents but anyone can weigh in. I am really curious about something. I went to the gym early this morning and spent a good 2 hours cleaning. We had a pre school class for 45 minutes and when they left all of 3 students plus parents and siblings in the halls the floors were trashed (food smashed on the floor, juice spilled), there was garbage everywhere (juice boxes, wrappers) and all the books and magazines I had put nicely back on the shelves were everywhere including the floor. And this happens every day, not just today. I also find an awful lot of coffee stains all over the new carpet we put in last summer. (Not many 3 year olds I know drink coffee so that is the parents.)

So my question is and I really am looking for honesty do people think because they pay for their kid to attend gym class that it is full service? Like it is okay to dump food everywhere and leave garbage everywhere and it is somehow the gyms responsibility to clean up after you and your tot? Or is it I clean up enough after my kid at home so I'll just let him go wild at the gym and let someone else deal with the aftermath? I am actually curious because obviously people think it is okay and they must rationalize it somehow. So what goes through ones head when little Suzie dumps her animal crackers all over the floor and starts stomping on them? Personally I think it is completly disrespectful but I don't have kids. Is it just an overwhelming thing? I know if I drop something all over I pick it up, and if I spill a drink the least I would do is alert someone so that it doesn't ruin the carpet. Any thoughts or ideas?

Oh yeah I forgot to add these pre school parents are the first to complain, in just the last week I have heard, the carpet needs to be vaccuumed (it is twice a week, why do you let your kids throw food on it?) the windows are smugged and I can't see (Why do you let you kids suction cup their faces to them?) and my favorite, the paint is peeling on the window seals, why is it peeling you ask? Because people let their kids pick at it.

 

[bogwoppit]

I totally get where you are coming from. The same kind of parents who behave that way are the ones you meet in hotels who let their kids run wild all night, slamming doors and throwing stuff all over. Please don't get me started on kids on planes or in restaurants!!!! Some people just do not have basic manners or respect for other people. In the end it is common courtesy to pick up after yourself and your kids when you are out, even if you know someone will come and clean.

I think some folk should spend a bit more time teaching their kids how to behave in public and less time watching soaps or on the internet.

 

[coachmolly]

I feel like too many parents think the gym, especially one without clearly stated rules, is just a free-for-all for the child participating as well as any siblings who are waiting around. I have had so many problems lately with parents allowing their children to play on the equipment or just wander the gym as they wait for their siblings or carpool members to finish with class. The parents just stand there and watch as their child runs around, jumps on the tramps, gets in the way of other classes and don't say a darn thing. What on earth would make them think that that's a good idea? We've also been having problems with parents dropping their kids off 10-15 minutes early and allowing them to wander into the gym and start running around. No matter how many times we lead them back to the waiting area and tell them it's not okay, they just keep doing it. It's really frustrating, not only because they are messing up stations which have been set up for classes, but also because it's a liability issue. Would a parent think of tossing their kid in the pool unattended at swimming lessons? Or tell their younger children to play around in the pool until Suzie's class is over? I honestly don't know what makes someone think the gym is so different.
As far as leaving messes, I think that's just the way some people are. It's amazing how many people intentionally leave trash at their seats at sporting events or movies, expecting someone else to clean it up for them. What a great lesson to teach your children!

 

[Bajanswife]

I have absolutely no idea, it's totally foreign to me how people could leave that kind of mess. I am somewhat messy at home, but I would never dream of leaving a mess anywhere else! Home is MY space, and I can treat it how I like, but I respect all other space. I am very aware of my kids when they are with me too, in respect of how they are leaving the space they were in. We always look for garbage cans, and we will actually pick up other people's garbage if it is nearby. If I spill something liquid I run to the bathroom to get tissue to wipe it up, unless it's just a little water that I know will dry quickly. We actually don't eat in the gym at all, except for one day a week when DD has a longer than usual class and they have a snack break - but then the girls eat together in one spot and they are careful not to leave a mess (the HC won't let them lol). I remember one time DD's sister had something a little messy she was finishing off when we arrived at the gym, and I made her stand just outside the door at the top of the steps so that if there were crumbs they would not fall inside the gym.

I would be so annoyed if I had to go through what you do - I think I'd be putting up signs! lol

 

[Azgymmiemom]

I can totally relate to this. We have one mom in particular who has a dd in one of our developmental classes(2hrs 2xper week) and she always brings the younger sibs...boy about 4 and girl about 20 mths. She watches her gymmie and lets the other two do whatever...we've caught them throwing things into the toilets!!! When I am working the front desk, I am too busy to babysitt...not my job, anyway, but we are trying to protect our new facility!! These kids throw food everywhere, spill everything, she just ignores them. We have spoken to the owners and I hope they do something about it. They aren't the only ones, but they are the worst and like this week after week. I have asked this mom to keep a closer eye on them so they stay out of the bathroom and she just glares at me and doesn't respond. She just doesn't care. Some people are like that. Go figure.

 

[sportzmomov3]

The parents with the little ones are the worst. They stay during the entire class, bring the siblings of gymnast, are watching their future superstar gymnast child-resulting in being completely oblivious to the behavior and actions of the other children they brought. I feel your pain and could tell you some disgusting stories about things that happen in the restrooms (I'll leave it at that, I think you all can imagine for yourselves.)

This is what I would do - post BIG signs up in the seating area that clearly state: PLEASE BE CONSIDERATE OF GYM STAFF AND CLEAN UP BEFORE YOU LEAVE. PLEASE DISPOSE OF YOUR TRASH PROPERLY. PLEASE MAINTAIN SUPERVISION OF YOUR CHILDREN AT ALL TIMES - WE ARE NOT A DAYCARE. FAILURE TO DO SO WILL RESULT IN A WEEKLY ASSESSMENT FEE OF $25 TO COVER ADDITIONAL CLEANING & MAINTENANC EXPENSES WHICH WILL BE APPLIED TO ALL FAMILIES. THANK YOU FOR YOUR COOPERATION.

Not that I'm really suggesting the assessment fee (well, maybe for some!), but if there isn't a consequence, parents won't get that THEY are the root of the problem.

Good luck!

 

[NGL780309]

It's so funny that you posted this because it's been on my mind and I just left a comment at DD's gym in the comment box. I bring my almost 2 year old all the time and she sometimes makes a big mess. She'll drop her snacks and yes step on a few before I can get to her. She spills her juice sometimes and then it's sticky on the floor. I always pick up our trash and try to pick up crumbs and use her baby wipes to clean up, but sometimes what I really need is a little broom to really do a good job of cleaning up. So I left a comment that it would be great if the gym would leave a little broom and dustpan upstairs for us to clean up after ourselves. There are bathrooms upstairs so it could easily be put in there for our use. I always have baby wipes in my purse, but some paper towels to clean up sticky accidents.

You are right that some people are just slobs and don't care. It happens at DD's gym too. But if you made some basic cleaning supplies available to parents many, like myself, would use them.

 

[Tumblequeensmom]

Unfortunately, this happens EVERYWHERE! I am seriously concerned that we are raising a bunch of people who have such a sense of entitlement that nothing will get done in the future because it will always be "someone else's job" to do anything! The parents are totally to blame for not teaching what's right and wrong!!! The messes that are left behind at my school are just as horrendous! It's funny... during school hours when the kids are "ours", they behave quite respectably for the most part because we demand it. BUT when there are after school activities w/parents present, it's a totally different story!

 

[mariposa]

Drives me crazy, too. We have a few moms that don't watch their kids while they are there watching siblings and it is really irritating. I keep my kid busy or we don't stay. I feel very bad for kids that "grow up" unsupervised in the gym's lobby. So sad. I wish we had a policy on it. I don't like having to babysit other people's kids when I do get the chance to stay and watch.

As to trashing stuff, that is horrible. I always clean up my mess (and also pick up other messes I see) because I want our gym to look clean. Some people just have no respect for other people's property or space. Sad. And of course the kids learn it from the parents, so the cycle continues.

 

[CoachGoofy]

It seems one of the current trends in parenting is "my child can do no wrong". Extensions of that are "look at the expressiveness of the animal cracker spit painting!" (seriously. Saw it. Threw up a little) and "if I ever say no to my child, their self esteem will be destroyed forever". I know at least 10 kids who never heard the word 'no' before I said it to them.

Parts of it also seem to be extensions of "I am paying for this" mentalities. Yeah, you are paying for me to teach your kid. You are not paying me to be their maid as well. And there's a whole lot of whatever-the-proles-can-do-it that goes into that too--there are some seriously entitled families out there. I worry for their kids when they grow up.

 

[Sunobo]

I am seriously concerned that we are raising a bunch of people who have such a sense of entitlement that nothing will get done in the future because it will always be "someone else's job" to do anything!

Oh my this is so true. I'm totally blown away by the lack of consideration the "Not my problem" uncaring people have. When my kids were younger, I made sure they had their entertainment bag but I also made sure they didn't disturb other people in the area. They had things to play with but they had to stay by me and play "quietly". They cleaned up their own messes and those they couldn't clean up, I did. Too many kids are out of control and the parents can't be bothered to reign them in. I just hope those of us that do care will continue to outnumber those who don't.

As far as the problem at aerialriver's gym, I would hand out a note about the issue and ask that parents please clean up after themselves and their children and if the problem persists, bring a trash can to the group and announce, "Here is a trash bin in case you need to throw away any trash you may have".

 

[gymcoach26]

We have a sign up that says ...

PLEASE CLEAN UP AFTER YOURSELVES-
Our coaches are here to teach your children, not clean up after them .

Yes people talked about it at first, but honestly they started cleaning up a bit. I think it just made them realize who actually get's stuck doing it when they don't. When they forget, I will make a point to go in the waiting room and grab the wrappers that are on the ground, sweep the crumbs away etc all while they're child is waiting at the door to go in. This usually sends the message.

 

[emorymom]

The "entitlement to messy snack" that some kids are accustomed to is very strange to me.

I don't think it's normal, polite or healthy for the child, for kids to be carrying around munchy carbs on demand in the 0-6 years. I don't understand it. I was never the mom with the desirable purse full of snack food. I don't think the French pull that crap and they aren't fat.

My kids say they are hungry, I say you can wait until dinner. I see lots of moms that jump to work when their kid says "I'm hungry" even when it couldn't possibly be true. Am I the only one who calls my kids on that? My kid packs a snack bag for gym practice and gets out an hour before her brother. She snacked at 5pm. If I hear that she is hungry when she gets out at 6pm, I'm not stupid. She just wants to see if I'll buy her crap from the vending machine. She can eat at 7pm when we get home.

I would like to whine "I'm thirsty for a margarita" every hour but it's not like my mom is going to show up to give me one.

 

[Pineapple_Lump]

I would like to whine "I'm thirsty for a margarita" every hour but it's not like my mom is going to show up to give me one.

Brilliant!

How about banning all food and drink after a nice warning?

 

[NGL780309]

There are a few parents at DD's gym that don't watch their kids and it drives me crazy. Three in particular that come to mind are a 3 year old boy that will be in a completely different part of the gym than his parents, bumming food off people, annoying everyone and his parents just ignore him. One parent said something to the mother one day and she acted like that parent was being a jerk. The other is one of the coaches kids and he runs around upstairs making messes, being loud, taking toys away from other kids etc. One day he was taking my 18 month old's toys and I finally told him to go away. Then someone told me it was the coaches son and I felt bad. And last, but definitely the worst is a girl who is in Level 5 with my DD, but she is in the other group that has a different schedule. She comes on her off days with to watch her sibling and she's so annoying. She is constantly bothering my youngest no matter how many times I've asked her to not pick her up, please don't carry her, stop taking her toys etc. Just because you are a member of the team doesn't mean you have fee run of the place.

As to the person who doesn't think people should be feeding their kids at gym, I have to disagree in some cases. DD has 4 hour practices. I drive 1 hour and 15 minutes to go get her and bring her to gym. I can't afford to eat out every night and I have to pack something for me and my little one to eat. I come straight from work and we don't get home until after 9pm. I'm starving and so is she. The trick is to just clean up after your child and try your best to not let them make a mess in the first place. You don't even want to know the story of the 3 year old I mentioned before running around eating a Gogurt without any supervision!

 

[busymomof4]

Sounds like these are the same type of parents/children that I experienced tonight at the ballfield. (The ones that don't want to be bothered with watching after their children.) There were several little boys ranging from 4yrs old to about 8 years old running up and down the metal bleachers the entire game and I never once saw one of their parents tell them to behave. We couldn't hardly watch the game from the noise and the kids running in front of where I was sitting. Some parents need to learn how to respect others and then teach that to their children!!!

 

[3rd_time_around]

Our gym outlawed food even in the waiting areas after someone had peanuts and left the shells all over the place.

What gets me is that we have a double-door glass door upstairs that the sun shines right in and in the girls faces on bars. We had hanging blinds, but they got torn up. So we put a mat against it, but the kids wouldn't stay off. So a dad who tints glass for a living, came in and for free put tinting on the glass. It lasted less than a week. One kid used their little fingernail and made a small scratch in it. That was it. I had to peel the rest off last week because it was hanging in strips and there was a big hole. The glass on the right still had the tinting intact, I even thought "at least that side still looks good." Well, yesterday I went upstairs and yep, there was a 2" scratch right in the middle of it! I was so mad. I put a sign right in the middle that said, "Do not touch the window." I will check every day and I had better not catch ANYONE tearing it up. The parents complain that the gym is trashy and messy, but when we try to do something to improve things, they let their kids tear it up.

 

[emorymom]

Oh NGL, I totally understand. I'm exaggerating a bit towards my point which is that there are some parents who allow their kids to demand food 24/7 (and obviously the kids never have to clean it up). It makes me wonder, do they insist that the schools allow them to carry around a bag of potato chips and a gatorade on demand in kindergarten? I will pick up a child from her house to carpool somewhere and the child will pull out crumbly cookies from the previously innocent looking backpack thirty seconds after getting into my car. Oh honey, I don't allow eating in the car under these circumstances. "But I'm hungry." Well didn't you just leave your house after a two hour break since school got out? And is this not a ten minute trip?

My kids do snack and we do sometimes have to plan ahead to / from the next thing, and we do snack in gym lobbies at times. But given that the whole reason they need to eat is that they are taking so much exercise, when I am grabbing things, it is usually string cheese and an apple.

There is justifiable eating in the lobby, and there is eating that probably should stop.

 

[aerialriver]

Thanks everyone! I think I am finally starting to understand what they are doing. So parents are becoming more like parents of most reptiles, just kid of pop it out and let it do what it wants cause you have better things to do then watch it. And number 2 a toddler has this somewhat annoying hole in their face, the hole makes noice, screams, and cries but instead of paying it attention and parenting it you shove food in it 24/7 because if food is entering it it is harder to make noise through it.

 

[bogwoppit]

Hmm I wonder why so many gyms do not encourage viewing?