Parents Gym coach gets 20 yrs.

[munchkin3]

A case in Florida, where a gym coach got 20 years for molesting kids.....sick!
i was trying to explain to my kids that adults usually don't hang around places where there are kids unless they have a reason. My child said that since what the gymnasts do is so cool, he could see why someone would want to watch.....I dont know.

in our case, our gym is part of a large athletic facility, where there are adults. This is why the kids have a bathroom escort (it is across the facility). All of the parents watch out for each others kids.....and the coaches are worry warts.

what makes this so hard is that it is an employee! A teacher! Someone you entrust your kids to.....

sorry for being overprotective, but I'd rather my kids go through therapy for me being an overprotective mom, than for something like this......

But I totally trust my coaches.......scary!

 

[Seeker]

Gives me chills. I feel bad for anyone who is caught in a situation like that...

 

[Deleted member D3987]

A case in Florida, where a gym coach got 20 years for molesting kids.....sick!
i was trying to explain to my kids that adults usually don't hang around places where there are kids unless they have a reason. My child said that since what the gymnasts do is so cool, he could see why someone would want to watch.....I dont know.

in our case, our gym is part of a large athletic facility, where there are adults. This is why the kids have a bathroom escort (it is across the facility). All of the parents watch out for each others kids.....and the coaches are worry warts.

what makes this so hard is that it is an employee! A teacher! Someone you entrust your kids to.....

sorry for being overprotective, but I'd rather my kids go through therapy for me being an overprotective mom, than for something like this......

But I totally trust my coaches.......scary!

a gymnastics coach? you said gym coach. Ray Adams??

 

[iwannacoach]

Ray Adams....... I just read the news.

 

[Deleted member D3987]

yes. he's a bad guy and has been for years. he got his start molesting kids, and his own family members some 30 years ago down in southern Illinois and St. Louis. his last incident in Illinois was in 1998. from there, he fled to Michigan, then Texas, then Ohio and finally landed in the sunshine state. ironically, that isn't what got him the 20 years. while is was out of jail and on bond for what he did down at Bieger's, he was busy with child porn and such on his computer. the Feds love that stuff.

his own mother reached out to several former gymnasts that he touched...i mean coached, and pleaded with them to testify on his behalf at his sentencing hearing. pitiful desperation.

the guy is a dirt bag and then some and i hope he enjoys his stay in prison.

by the way, if anyone down in Florida can send me a recent news article link i would appreciate it. my LN is not working at the moment and i can't search and pull up anything at the moment. thanks in advance.

 

[Seeker]

This article is from a while back....March 2013

Raymond Adams: New child porn charges for Deerfield gym coach - Sun Sentinel

This one is from yesterday:
Former Boca Raton, Treasure Coast gymnastics coach sentenced... | www.palmbeachpost.com

 

[mimi]

http://articles.sun-sentinel.com/20...ral-child-molestation-charges-federal-charges

 

[emorymom]

New arrest in tx too.

Sent from my SCH-I545 using ChalkBucket mobile app

 

[MaryA]

There was lots of stuff in the news during the whole Sandusky thing about him "grooming" the boys... doing something just a little bit out of line and waiting to see if there's a reaction from the kid or from his parent. As parents that tells us that we can't let our fear of being labeled a CGM (or CGD) keep us from speaking up when something seems "off."

 

[BlairBob]

Regarding the Sandusky case, Law & Order SVU made an episode about a basketball coach that was not long after Sandusky. Seen it twice here since I've been in CO (since my dad watches L&O a lot).

It is very EEW if you ever find out a coach you knew was guilty of that. I did once some years ago though I didn't find out till after he had been coaching at our gym. It was very WTH.

 

[Deleted member D3987]

Regarding the Sandusky case, Law & Order SVU made an episode about a basketball coach that was not long after Sandusky. Seen it twice here since I've been in CO (since my dad watches L&O a lot).

It is very EEW if you ever find out a coach you knew was guilty of that. I did once some years ago though I didn't find out till after he had been coaching at our gym. It was very WT?.

maybe change that to WTH?

 

[MaryA]

A teacher at a school I taught at was accused (I don't know if he was convicted or not... it happened after I left). It was a very warm fuzzy private school, but even when I taught there I remember thinking that this teacher spent too much time alone with some of the older (5th-6th grade) girls. I didn't think (though maybe I should have... I was a teacher but not yet a parent at the time, plus he was such a "nice guy") that there was anything amiss going on, but more that he should be careful because any one of those girls could say anything and it would be his word against hers and his career would be over.

Bottom line, anyone who works with kids knows that this is an issue so the smart ones go out of their way NOT to be alone with kids. Classroom doors get left open, other adults are around, etc. Anyone who seeks out time to be alone behind closed doors with a kid who is not his/her own is suspect, IMO.

 

[munchkin3]

It can happen anywhere, anytime.....these sick people look for certain traits in kids.....

this guys was really bad. I know people who were around during the whole beiger thing and the worst part, is that the brainwashed people and kids really bought into him being the best guy in the world!
that is sooooooooooo terrible!
imagine something like this happens, and nobody from your 'family' believes you????

What I want to know is how he kept getting hired??? Doesn't everyone do a background check?

Apparently he has another case pending and if he gets charged, he will be in for life.

Here is the article....

http://touch.sun-sentinel.com/#section/-1/article/p2p-76795688/

 

[wallflower]

I sadly have first hand knowledge of a gym coach doing this. Thankfully not a coach at my kids gym or my kid. In this situation the parents of the girl allowed her to be alone with him,
ride in the car with him, even go to his house alone. Her mom admits in retrospect that she was blinded by all the special attention the coach gave her DD and the promises he made regarding her gymnastics career. The mom played right into it. Trust no one. Not even family members. I have no problem being the overprotective mom and looking crazy for it.

 

[txgymfan]

Not about a coach but a co-worker. A guy I worked with on a very limited basis needed something from a remote, donated warehouse. I went with him alone, with no cell phone to the space and felt very very creaped out. I gave him his stuff as fast as I could, drove back to the office and told a male colleague that I would never be alone with the guy again. I could not verbalize a reason but the feeling was extremely strong.

Later he dated a friend of mine and beat her bloody. It took a few times before she left him. Always pay attention to that creapy feeling.

 

[Deleted member D3987]

no matter how you spell it...creapy or creepy...i"m sincerely happy to hear that it was not you and you telling us that it was. sorry about your friend.

 

[txgymfan]

Thank you. That was the strongest feeling I have ever had about anyone and it left a lasting impression.

 

[Canadian_gym_mom]

These stories kill me a little more inside every day. Just recently here, a boy ( well man now) that I skated with came forward to tell of abuse he endured at the hands of one of our coaches.

I have a hard time with trusting but I do trust my dds gym coaches 100%.

 

[BlairBob]

I like this new spelling, "creapy".

maybe change that to WTH?

Dunno, I changed it. Somehow I never curse when coaching, however when training let's just say I did lots of pushups. Man, I used to hate that.

 

[iwannacoach]

....... It was a very warm fuzzy private school, but even when I taught there I remember thinking that this teacher spent too much time alone with some of the older (5th-6th grade) girls. I didn't think (though maybe I should have... I was a teacher but not yet a parent at the time, plus he was such a "nice guy") that there was anything amiss going on.......

Bottom line, the smart ones (mentors teachers, coaches, and all) go out of their way NOT to be alone with kids. Classroom doors get left open, other adults are around, etc. Anyone who seeks out time to be alone behind closed doors with a kid who is not his/her own is suspect, IMO.

It can happen anywhere, anytime.....these sick people look for certain traits in kids..... the worst part, is that the brainwashed people and kids really bought into him being the best guy in the world!

In this situation the parents of the girl allowed her to be alone with him,
ride in the car with him, even go to his house alone....... Her mom admits in retrospect that she was blinded by all the special attention the coach gave her DD and the promises he made regarding her gymnastics career. The mom played right into it. Trust no one. Not even family members. I have no problem being the overprotective mom and looking crazy for it.

I went with him alone, with no cell phone to the space and felt very very creaped out. I gave him his stuff as fast as I could...... I could not verbalize a reason but the feeling was extremely strong....... Later he dated a friend of mine and beat her bloody.

What I want to know is how he kept getting hired??? Doesn't everyone do a background check...... munchkin3

As far as I know, and in my opinion.......

The problem with the background check is they rely heavily on two things, public records and internet searches of those records. That's all fine and dandy except for two things, the number of county and federal court houses would require something like 3000 different searches, and the fact that there are volumes of records that date back to times before everybody archived records on the internet. So as everyone knows..... if it isn't on the internet, as a practical matter, it doesn't exist.

The only way the companies can economically conduct searches is to focus on the counties in which an applicant has lived or been employed. Well that ought to work but for one thing, they only know where to look based on disclosures made by the applicant. So you tell me what you would do if you were Ray Adams. Would you disclose those, if any, convictions....... or those instances where moving on was the best way to avoid allegations getting to the point of a criminal investigation? Yeah right, like that'll ever happen. I'll let you draw your own conclusions about the reliablity of companies that do these background checks.

Whether you trust background checks or not, the best defense against these creeps is you. As your read through the thread you saw statements like the above I put in bold. Much of what's said can be seen to some degree at every gym, but it's not a clear indication or cause to suspect the coach who pats kids on the back or gives a shoulder hug when they are appropriate expressions consistent with what's taking place..... like making it through a routine or skill for the first time, or consoling a kid who's pet hamster escaped and.... well, you know.

So what should set off your creeper alarm??????

When a coach pats or hugs with no cause. Really, how often does a kid do something great or suffer a personal tragedy? Maybe once, possibly twice a day for the great stuff, and few kids have tragedies they need to be consoled for.

When the patting moves over time from an acceptable landing spot, on the middle or upper back, and creeps a little bit lower each week, or moves off center and closer to the side of their body than the center.

When they seem to good to be true to certain kids, but not to everyone else. Genuine goodness gets shared with everyone, but creeps are too busy focusing their attention on the select few. Oddly, these kids seem no more skilled for the attention they recieve.

When they come to 'the rescue' so often you feel obligated to them in some way. The irony of this one is that you sometimes express your thanks by including them in some activity that includes part or all of your family..... like maybe something simple like "Hey, we were just going to get pizza, and we'd love to have you along.

When you get "that feeling"...... maybe because.........

You keep getting told how well your child is doing, but they don't shine the same way at competitions. Hey, now *there's* another chance for a consolation hug that more resembles a 50's 'first step' at the movies.

Great coach..... but kinda clumsy and moving the wrong way *all the time*...... Whoops!

There's probably more but that's all that comes to mind at the moment. Feel free to add to the list.

I just want to add that the profile of the victim is not consistent with with respect to age or skill level. I know of a few instances where the child was an extremely accomplished gymnast, so don't assume these people can't walk and chew gum at the same time.

Keep in mind that there are *thousands* of gym coaches and very few instances of abuse. Please don't suspect every coach with one or two quirky behaviors....... So wadda you do? Don't trust them to be alone with your child no matter the circumstance, tell other parents that you've seen this or that so they can be on the lookout for any of these behaviors, and if your observations go beyond the point of that's 'peculiar,' take a moment to chat with the owner, head coach, or the peculiar individual. All you really have to say is..... I'd prefer, for everyone's benifit, that this wasn't done.