Starting her Period - What to do?

[amykeane]

My daughter is devastated that she has started menstruating. The first one was okay as it was just 2 days and very light, but her second period was a full week and heavy for several days. She loves gymnastics and has been involved since she was 6 and lives for it, but suddenly is telling me she isn't sure she is very good and finding other ways to devalue it. We played the "sick" card during her last period to buy some time but she is very embarrased about it and had no luck with trying tampons. I am sure others have been through this and would welcome your wisdom.

 

[zemirah]

Poor thing.. I would persist with tampons, she'll get the hang of it and it will be worth it to have her freedom back. Other option I guess is to talk to the coach and see if she can wear shorts over a leo and use a pad for that week. I would probably have been mortified to do it that way as it would be so obvious that she has her period, but if she's really not comfortable with tampons it might be an option.

 

[flipandtwist]

I suggest her using a pantyliner and dark colored leotards. Change the pantyliner every hour or so and even if it goes through a little no one will see. I would also suggest talking to a female coach to see if she can wear shorts for that "time of the month". Continue trying to use tampons. Although some people never seem to get the hang of it.
Hope I helped.

 

[Linsul]

My mom let my coach know without telling me, and told me she told the coaches I was sick those weeks. I don't know if you're ok with deception, but my mom had to do that or else I'd have been mortified. We joke about it now though...which is weird probably but hey whatever lol. A few weeks of learning how to cope with menstruation and all that comes with it isn't asking much I don't think; it pretty much changes the nature of a females existence.

Explain the practicality of tampons, especially with summer coming up. No tampon = no pool! The tampax pearl ones have a very simple applicator that is pretty much the easiest ever to use. Maybe try a light one in combination with a panty liner and let her get used to it. There's no easy way to say this, so I'm just gonna say it: Make sure she knows how much to insert it, or she will feel it as she moves. I had string-loss anxiety so barely inserted them, and of course feeling it resulted, which made me hate them. Proper use of them counts a lot towards winning a person over through their utility!

 

[Shelovesthebars]

My teenage daughters now refuse to use anything other than the playtex Sport variety of tampons and they have been happy. They say that they are easier to use and the best for moving and flipping.

 

[CreateMagic]

I was on swim team when I first started menstrating, so there wasn't much of a choice whether or not to use them! I would echo to try the tampons again--maybe buy a few different brands so she can decide what she likes best. I've always used OB, but they don't have an applicator. It was what my mom always used, so I didn't really know any different. I also don't see anything wrong with taking a night or two off during the heaviest parts of her period. Its a lot for any girl to adjust to. Good luck!

 

[gymnut1]

she will probably find that after the next one or two they will settle down and not be so heavy. Definitely speak to her coaches (either with or without her permission) Lots of girls drop out during this time and they should try and help her adjust. A dark coloured thick velvet leotard is her best bet. Using panty liners and changing them hourly is also a great idea. Shorts are such a help when girls get to this age. Could she wear them? Get her to practise with tiny tampons at home. She could wear a panty liner with them for extra security and keep checking if she needs to change that. Tell her every woman in the world is on her side. Is there an older girl in her group she could confide in? It might help to have some 'on the spot' girl support during sessions. Just someone to cover her back and fend off comments about her keep going to the toilet or wearing shorts. My heart goes out to her. Hang in there. It will get easier.

 

[Bobby]

Gosh ladies - we're living in a new millenium.
Gymnastics, swimmers, and the like need to be water tight and not have to stress about strings, leakage and other nasty things.
Toss the tampons and go for the cup. I personally like the Lunette, but I have friends who love the Diva Cups and Mooncups.
Google them.
Anyway teenaged girls generally have an easier time with the cups. And save a whole bunch of $s too over monthly purchases!!!

 

[Aussie_coach]

Oh dear, is her coach female? It might help to point out that her coach goes through this as well. Point out the older girls in the gym and explain that they go through it too.

Is there an older girl she would feel comfortable talking to about it, and asking how they deal with it. I always had a lot of younger gymnasts come to me when I was competing and ask about it. It made a big difference to them to hear that it was fine and you get by OK.

Do keep trying with the tampons, they will make her life so much easier. Explain that it isn't working because she is too tense and talk about relaxing the muscles or it won't go in. It might be worth looking for the tampons that come with an applicator as they are much easier to use.

You can also find pads that are small enough and no one will notice. I often used a pad with a leotard when I was young and no one ever noticed/. I just trimmed it down a bit to fit perfectly inside the leotard.

 

[CreateMagic]

Gosh ladies - we're living in a new millenium.
Gymnastics, swimmers, and the like need to be water tight and not have to stress about strings, leakage and other nasty things.
Toss the tampons and go for the cup. I personally like the Lunette, but I have friends who love the Diva Cups and Mooncups.
Google them.
Anyway teenaged girls generally have an easier time with the cups. And save a whole bunch of $s too over monthly purchases!!!

Great idea! Hadn't even crossed my mind, but I know women who have great success with these! Isn't there a lower risk of TSS with this too?

 

[fishchimes]

I just got mine a few months ago; I was horrified! It was a lot heavier then I expected. Mine seems to go in cycles- one month it is VERY light, the next heavy. I never wear tampons; we just don't have them around the house as my mom doesn't wear them.

Here are 3 strategies for when you are menstruating heavily.

1. Wear a thick pad and baggy shorts (not the formfitting kind). You can also talk privately with the coach and ask to wear pants.
2. Wear a thin pad and change it between events (I usually do this).
3. Tampons, cups, etc.

If you are getting bad cramps, DO NOT go to practice. Stay home with a hot water bottle (they really help).

 

[CreateMagic]

If you are getting bad cramps, DO NOT go to practice. Stay home with a hot water bottle (they really help).

fishchimes, sometimes the best thing you can do for horrible cramps is go to practice! Exercise releases endorphins, the feel-good hormone, and it can actually help your cramps. In jr. high/early high school, I used to walk around the building when they started up.

 

[Linsul]

fishchimes, sometimes the best thing you can do for horrible cramps is go to practice! Exercise releases endorphins, the feel-good hormone, and it can actually help your cramps. In jr. high/early high school, I used to walk around the building when they started up.

Seconding this! I stayed home from gym/school a couple of days during my first and second period. My mom finally was like 'get off your butt, you're gonna have to deal with this the rest of your life so start coping!' The stretching portion of gym really helped though it hurt a lot at first, and by the time it was over I was ready for practice. Aside from the random intense cramp here and there it got better the more I did. The less you inhibit yourself and your activities, the more you can learn about yourself and what works, it may surprise you!

 

[ebie2005]

Gosh ladies - we're living in a new millenium.
Gymnastics, swimmers, and the like need to be water tight and not have to stress about strings, leakage and other nasty things.
Toss the tampons and go for the cup. I personally like the Lunette, but I have friends who love the Diva Cups and Mooncups.
Google them.
Anyway teenaged girls generally have an easier time with the cups. And save a whole bunch of $s too over monthly purchases!!!

i am assumiing she is quite young and seens as she hasnt evan started with tapons i think using a cup is a step to far to quick and thay may be cheaper but they are easier the older you are especially if you have gone through childbirth(i dont know why you think they are easier for teens). Let her try out applicator and non-aplicator as some people find one more preferable and although people say aplicators are best for starters, let her try non-aplicator

 

[Pickle's Mom]

The first few months really are the toughest, especially when the body is learning how to deal with the new hormonal surges.

Gently remind her that every older girl at the gym goes through this too, and they all find a solution. It will become easier as she becomes more comforable tampons.

I also agree that physical activity (especially stretching) can be the best solution for moderate cramps.

 

[fishchimes]

Really?? I didn't know it would help! I often feel really nauseous when I get cramps and I thought flipping would be a bad idea. Well, you learn something new every day.

 

[zemirah]

I agree that the Diva cup (or similar) is great! I love mine!! But, I do think it would be a bit overwhelming for a girl that's having trouble with tampons.. if she feels up to trying, I'd recommend it, but otherwise, let her get used to tampons first.

 

[AGM78910]

I just got mine a few months ago; I was horrified! It was a lot heavier then I expected. Mine seems to go in cycles- one month it is VERY light, the next heavy. I never wear tampons; we just don't have them around the house as my mom doesn't wear them.

Here are 3 strategies for when you are menstruating heavily.

1. Wear a thick pad and baggy shorts (not the formfitting kind). You can also talk privately with the coach and ask to wear pants.
2. Wear a thin pad and change it between events (I usually do this).
3. Tampons, cups, etc.

If you are getting bad cramps, DO NOT go to practice. Stay home with a hot water bottle (they really help).

Our gym will not permit baggy shorts or "Soffies" because of safety issues. They have to wear the tight shorts. The coaches fingers can get caught in them when spotting. Tight volleyball or cheer shorts are best to wear over the leotard.

Also, my daughter goes to a female pediatrician who offered to teach her how to properly insert the tampons.

 

[Bobby]

i am assumiing she is quite young and seens as she hasnt evan started with tapons i think using a cup is a step to far to quick and thay may be cheaper but they are easier the older you are especially if you have gone through childbirth(i dont know why you think they are easier for teens). Let her try out applicator and non-aplicator as some people find one more preferable and although people say aplicators are best for starters, let her try non-aplicator

My girls are still babies and admittedly I haven't directly discussed this with my late-teen nieces so am going on what my SIL said about their experiences.
They apparently found tampons difficult because of their dryness, whereas the cups didn't have that issue (especially if done in the shower). But it was also to do with the cup lasting so much longer. When they were learning they would do it in the shower, and just shower morn+after school+at night (but just morn and night most lighter days). I'd imagine most gymansts could insert the cup, compete a full competition (along with a million nervous trips to urinate without ever having to rearrange their sanitary wear or do a full leo strip) and be home before they need to think about the cup again. And that should certainly be true for all but the longest training sessions.

 

[gymdog]

I've heard people who have tried the cup (gymnastics people) say they liked it but didn't want to do gymnastics in it. I have no idea why but since it's not very common among teens I guess it's hard to say. Since inserting it hard if the issue is with that part and not the feel then I guess it might not work. Tampons, try the OB kind, they are smaller, no applicator, although that could make things harder. The Playtex Sport kind are good, but I think the OB is more comfortable. If she's not allowed shorts, a dark colored leo and matching briefs.